I tried out that ex-husband routine on this HB (Perfect Internet Game. WOAH.)
I started off with:
heyyy, after rigorously looking over your profile for a few seconds, thought you should know that i have already married and divorced you in my head. thanks for all the wonderful imaginary memories; like our honeymoons in Rome and Cancun, and the funnier ones like when you drunk dialed from your bachelorette party apologizing about the strippers lol.... you will always have a special place in my heart.
your ex-husband,
P.S. keep the house in Hawaii, but half of our money is mine; according to our prenup
She didn't reply, but she did friend request me. I messaged her "give me one good reason why i should accept you" Looking back it was pretty harsh. Three days later she messaged back:
HB: "Hey what's up? I'm sorry but I don't remember you. "
Fauxhawk: "Good, now I don't feel so bad about not remembering you, haha. Your very pretty, but your not my type. Hence, me being your imaginary EX-husband, and we divorced because of your fling with the pool boy, Pablo, remember?"
HB: "No where did I meet you?"
Where do I take this?