I just realized that most of my approach anxiety is not related to fear of being rejected by a girl - if I like someone I'm pretty comfortable and easy going about giving it a shot - it's that I am afraid of feeling embarrassed in front of other men. With this I mean my friends mainly, but I decided to write this because I realize I would be intimidated as well, if I was ever to hook up with a PUA (from this site for example) to go sarge. I do so much better sarging if I am somewhere new - traveling, or even just temporarily removed from my friends at social gatherings. I think a lot of this is ego, that I want people to look up to me or something...in a way I have more of a front I show to my male friends, while when I want to hook up with a girl, I'm more fearless to be open and be myself. I mean, I am myself with friends, its just this one area- getting with girls - that I try to impress them with. For all the lay reports I have shared with them, I almost never randomly open someone I am interested in while they stand and watch, unless I have some overt invite. I justify this by telling myself that I am demonstrating value to women who may be looking my way, by just having a good time with my boys, and I will wait for a more subtle chance to open if I think there is attraction...but obviously it is costing me some opportunities that I don't just go for it in these situations - especially in clubs for example.
Does anyone know about this specific frame, and could you please give some advice?
Thank you!
Dano

Don't give a shit.

Any guy who would laugh at your approach wouldn't cold approach a woman in their life. They don't have the balls.

Does it suck to have people watch you get denied? Sure. It sucks to get denied, period. But within the next hour I'm walking out of the joint with another chick to get some Chinese food while we decide whose house we're staying at tonight.

You are going to be laughed at. Accept it. When you don't get a number, guys will laugh to themselves. When you do get a number, guys will laugh to themselves. It's their AFC ways. A cold approach is so foreign to them that it's silly, whether you get a number or not.

Ignore them. They're the ones going home to make love with their hand.

You have to get used to haters and stop caring about what people thing. The more successful you get at anything, the more haters you'll encounter.

WOWWWWWWW..............Another person that's kind of (and thats being nice) closedminded and hasn't grown up yet. How do you know if those people that laugh at someone for getting turned down wouldn't cold approach someone? How do you know if its because of their "AFC ways" that they laugh to themselves if the person in question gets a number or not? Maybe its like this:

*Guy doesn't get number*

Other person(s) *to themselves*: Haha, thats what I thought


or


*Guy gets number*

Other person(s) *to themselves*: Heh, wow, never saw that one comin



See, you have to think before you assume or say something dumb.

haha, thanks for the feedback fellas. But to clarify, I'm not talking about random haters or afcs, Im talking mostly about my good friends. Well, fair enough some of them are afcs, haha, but for the most part they are really cool people, who do fine sarging or have nice girlfriends. What I am saying is that it is on me, I'm the one who for some reason doesn't feel right about sarging random girls in front of them. None of my close friends are my wings, though I have met some guys I didn't know that well who were great wings. I guess that is something I really want to learn, how to be good at sarging with my friends, also so I can help some of them out to meet girls. I am just curious if anyone can identify with this. thanks,
Dano

Dano bro.

try making your buds a tool for openign a set.

Like you can start some debate with your buds about the opposite sex's or maybe one of them is having relationship problems OR SOMETHING.

That's when you'd say "lets get a girls opinion on this" you can then proceed to go to a group of girls(or just 1) and start a convo right there. Make it seem as casual as possible, then the second time around. You can just proceed to sarge. That's what i did. Hope it help. Also The "dont give a shit" thing works too.- Redkid/Evolution

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I'll rise to the top yet. Just watch me.

wow bro i I.D myself with this so much just yesterday i was at the club and i have all my friends around me 2 of them are good looking so they get girls pretty quick. and im just embarrased to go up to a girl and dance with her b/c if they reject me the guys will see that and i just dont like it. i got to dance with about 5 girls all night and thats when i separated myself the problem with that is that when u dont open rite away and u stay with ur friends or u go around just looking around u dlv urself. im gonna go bak to the club next week and well im gonna go all out bro who cares what ppl say or think at the end of the day its a learning process...