Throughout my experiences with pick up and relationships I would say that the most important thing is to be able to truly be happy with yourself no matter who you are with, even if you are alone. If you do not do this, and continually attempt to change yourself, others and world to fit the mold that you have set, you are undergoing a task that is impossible.

Most people start pick up because they are unhappy and feel this will give them what they need to be happy. Pick up should be used as a tool; if you are using to fill a void within yourself you are merely patching a wall instead of fixing the foundation, a temporary fix to a larger problem. If you do not accept yourself, pick up will destroy you. Chances are that day will come when someone or something comes along and shakes that foundation and you are right back to where you started, unhappy with yourself and feeling the same way you felt before you decided to start seeking something more.

That is why if you want to be happy, be happy with yourself and stop setting expectations that can’t be met. You should be enriching your life with things that make you happy, not what makes you feel better about your existence.

I completely agree. In my experience, pickup is what GAVE me the confidence in the first place to start being happy with myself. It made me take a look at myself, and the people around me, and to understand why people do the things that they do. As you say, I guess I looked at it more as a means, rather than an end.

I think the best thing that pickup has made me do was to listen to some Tony Robbins CDs. As gay as that sounds, it has honestly been the best thing that has happened to me since I got in to the game. The most important thing I learned is to make that inner voice be optimistic.

Before, I would always curse at myself for mistakes, and just generally be my own worst enemy, my harshest critic. But now when I make mistakes, I just tell myself what I can do better next time.

Great post, and I hope that everyone will heed your advice.

I use to be a total hater on this idea, but lately I see this. If you can love yourself, I mean truly emotionally believe you are the love of your own life, this will reflect through all your actions.

Things will click, and you slowly lose the importance of the girls, the lays, and all the objective goals of pick up, women will flock you. I'm still struggling with this, but lately I see girls as just that, nothing more.

It's like I'm in a video game, and I can do whatever I want, open with whatever I want, and as long as I stay strong in this mindset it goes over really well.

_________________
I'm addicted to facing my fears.