I had an eye accident a few years back that damaged my vision enough so that I am not allowed to drive, but can see relatively well otherwise. This is a sticking point for me because I feel like once I get the HBs number I've got no way to move on to step 2. I'm stuck in limbo. I know I could go w/friends and/or tell the HB but would 1) seem needy, 2) look dependent and 3) make me feel stupid. Am I overreacting to this? How can I work around this? Again, this is my biggest sticking point so please help.

apart of moving to a larger city, I cant think of any good idea.

Is there any public transport around you? I honestly feel your pain on this once since when I was younger and couldn't drive I hated living so far from people (it still sucks since for people who cant drive to get to my place is impossible, there is 1 bus a DAY).
If there is public transport you unfortunately have to bite the bullet and take it, there will be issues with it (such as fixed times) but its better than nothing.

Aside from that, Taxi's seem like your only sure fire option. Obviously this is going to be expensive but is the perfect solution.

Apart from those 2, maybe a small place in the city? just as a "weekend" place you can party and crash at would seem like a possible idea (again cash dependant).

Lastly, you could always tell the HB of your situation. It is all about how you word it and make it sound to how she will react. I am thinking something along the lines of "I'll come, you can drive and I will buy the first drinks". That shows your not a cheap ass trying to get free lifts.
Think of it this way, sure asking her might not get good results, but even if you get 10% of the dates, thats still 10% more than you get at the moment?

Madals