| Before I start I must say that I do not advocate the use of drugs in any way, shape, or form.
Drugs are not cool. Stay in school. Never play with matches.
Also, this is pretty long but I wanted to make sure I put down everything as it was a very weird night indeed.
Anyway it's about 7pm on Saturday (11th April) and I'm a bit zoned out after smoking some weed with my housemate and I'm playing Burnout Paradise in my break from 4 dimensional vector study which is doing my nut when I get a phone call. It's from a number I don't recognise but I pick it up anyway.
"Hello?"
"Hey! Jacob! What are you doing tonight!?"
"Hey not much, sorry who's this again?"
"It's Kelly remember!? From Thursday!?"
"Oh hey Kelly! Yea, what have you been up to?"
I have absolutely no idea who the fuck this person is.
"Not much hey-but listen! We're all getting together at Fridays you should come! It'll be so fun!"
This girl sounds like an ADHD schiz but hey I might as well, what's the worst that could happen.
"Yea sure! What time is it?"
"Ooh! Yay! OK cool, it's at 9-I'll see you then!"
And then she hangs up. I have a cup of coffee to wake me up and a fucking freezing cold shower, not to wake me up but because the heating's fucked. I pop on my superman tee, the only pair of black jeans I've got, and my smart shoes after having been denied entry into Fridays for wearing Volleys just the other night (seriously, what the fuck is that). I put some eyedrops in that clear up red eyes to mask the pink tinge. I down 4 beers and a Mother and catch the train to the city. I get to Fridays at about 10 past 9, reeling a bit from the weed, on edge from the caffeine and guarana, and with Dutch courage from the alcohol. I don't even know who I'm looking for so I head to the bar outside near all the tables, buy a vodka orange, and lean against the bar surveying who's there. I'm trying to catch people's eye until someone recognises me while slowly beginning to think I might be being set up. Before long I catch a girl's eye and she smiles at me so I smile back in case it's Kelly. She heads on over and says
"Jacoooob! I'm soo glad you made it!
She's got a German accent and she gives me a big hug so I reciprocate but make sure I'm the one to pull away first. She looks alright, about a 6 but with a touch of fat which turns me right off. Anyway we head back to her group and I get a hug from all the girls and big grins and handshakes from all the guys, which I reciprocate. I'm starting to get a little bit edgy seeing as I don't remember these people even though they clearly remember me (there are big gaps in my memory from Thursday night in which I have no idea what I did) but I mask it by enthusiastically talking about random shit. I discover that Kelly is the blonde girl sitting across from me, violently tapping and chewing her hair and nails. Her eyes look huge in her little face and they're darting around all over the place. Her pupils are enormously dilated and I'm conclude that she must be on speed or meth. I end up talking to a shifty guy called Mark and we end up on the topic of drugs. After a little while he says he's got something to show me so we head into the bathroom and he pulls me into a cubicle. I immediately jump to the conclusion that he's gay and trying to fuck me but he pulls out a little bag of coke and a small mirror. We do a couple of lines each and I'm out of the toilet like a speeding bullet. I hurtle over to the bar and slam my palm down on the benchtop.
"WATER!!"
I practically scream it at the guy at the bar who looks a bit stunned and the couple next to me jump a little.
"Please!"
I add. I get the water and knock it back as quick as I can. It doesn't really help the drips in my throat so I go to the toilet again and drink from the taps like a fish, practically drowning myself. I feel a bit better and head back out. Now full of Yuppie courage as well as Dutch courage, I approach a 3 set of 2 girls and a guy. I can't remember exactly what I said but I freaked one of the girls out while seemingly intriguing the other one but the guy dragged them off as he could clearly see I was on something. I let them go and turned to a 2 set of girls sitting right next to me.
"Hey girls answer me this quick question, who lies more guys or girls?"
They just look at me like you would an informercial; bored recognition of the fact that words are being spoken. Tough crowd.
"Why are you wearing a superman t-shirt?"
"I'm sorry what?"
"Ugh, never mind"
And she turns around, effectively blocking me out. This really pisses me off but I see Mark looming towards me in my peripheral vision. The tiny dance floor is predominantly female so me and Mark go over and start dancing. Mark is all over the fucking place but I'm playing it cool making sure I don't look like the cokehead I am. I get dancing with this girl who's probably an 8, however it's hard to tell in that light. I end up with my hands on her hips and hers on my shoulders when some guy comes over and drags her away. He turns to me and says
"You fuckin' dancin' with my girlfriend cunt!?"
I thrust my face into his, nearly headbutting the fucker and shout
"WHAAAAAAAAAAAT!?"
He says it again more aggressively this time, so I grab the back of his head and his shoulder, pull him towards me and say in his ear
"Call me cunt again and I'll get my boys to rape your girl and cut your fuckin' tongue out."
He looks at me like he's contemplating smashing my face in when Mark came up next to me and spits out
"Fuck are you lookin' at"
The guy looked from Mark to me and back again, decided against it, and scuttled off. I felt a rush of newfound enthusiasm flush through me from my over the top threat and started dancing with some more girls. Before long I was dirty dancing with probably a 7. I started doing the triangulation thing where you look from one eye to the other, then down to the lips and back again. She started doing the same so I bit my bottom lip subtly and after a little while so did she. I thought 'now or never' so moved in for the kill and started making out with her. She grabbed me and pushed me up against the wall and started violently making out with me, chewing my bottom lip and biting my neck hard. She started rubbing her pussy on my hip when her friend came over and dragged her off. I was a bit pissed but kept dancing and ended up dirty dancing again with what looked like blonde twins. I was over the moon but like magic they suddenly vanished. I wondered if the coke was playing tricks on my mind so headed back to Kelly's group. All the girls there either looked like drug casualties or they were ugly so I didn't bother.
We eventually ended up going to some other club which can't remember the name of and me and Mark tried to start a fight with a gang of 4 ridiculously annoyingly loud guys who were all up for it till they saw our eyes and flailing, sporadic movements, at which point they hastily decided not to and quickly moved on. As soon as we were in the club, me, Mark, and the dodgiest looking skinny fucker I've ever seen in my life did a couple lines in the toilets. I was off again and spotted a 4 set of 1 guy and 3 girls. The guy was absolutely fucking huge but I was chinged up so I didn't care. I strolled over and dropped myself onto the only seat remaining at their table propping my feet up on the table and leaning back.
"Just a quick question, how much can you deadlift?"
The massive guy just stared at me. I stared back unflinching as we quickly sized each other up. He was several times the size of me but I was clearly off my head. It began to grew awkward and I quickly assessed the situation; if he tried anything violent I could smash one of the many glasses on the table through his face, pick up the chair I was sitting on, and smash it across his head before making a speedy getaway. I was getting way too paranoid caught up in this stare-off until he finally said
"Um, 260"
I dropped my feet off the table and lunged forward, slamming my fist ridiculously hard on the table causing a massive bang that probably the whole fucking club heard and caused the people around the table to jump back a bit.
"FUCK OFF! Is that pounds or kilos?"
"Kilos"
"Fuckin' hell I can only do 100"
"Are you going for maxes or reps though"
"Reps, 5 to 7"
"Oh right well I'm doing maxes that's why..."
We had a massive talk about the gym and eventually ended up talking about the the things I always end up talking about, i.e. the things you're not supposed to talk about (religion, money, politics, war, death, drugs, abortion, censorship, etc). I always end up talking about this shit, usually after about 2 or 3 minutes of boring generic talk like where do you work/what are you studying, where are you from, did you watch whatever, blah blah blah. This shit bores me to fucking tears yet every time I try to move off it most people (especially girls) shut down and block it out. However this massive guy (who's name I found out is 'Silver' or 'Sil' (I was gonna try and subtly ask him if he's a PUA but didn't wanna break the conversation)) is more than happy to talk about it. He's gone from a scary fucker to a pretty interesting guy who's actually smiling now. I haven't even looked at the girls but they keep trying to contribute to the conversation. I knock them back with negs like
"Does she even know what we're talking about?"
"Does she always interrupt like that?"
And a few more I can't really remember. After a while Silver gets a phone call and he quickly leaves with the girl sitting next to him without saying goodbye. The girl he leaves with is ridiculously hot and has an ice cold and intimidating attitude which is why I ignored her the whole time she was there. Anyway I'm left with the 2 blonde chicks who I realise are the 2 'twins' I was dirty dancing with in Fridays. Except they're not twins they just look very similar. They're both around a 7 but their bodies must be 11. I try not to let this bother me too much but it's extremely hard not to stare.
"Don't I know you from somewhere?"
Says one of the girls, the one with blue eyes says (I'll call her Blue for now cus I didn't get either of their names). I pretend to think for a little while and then the other one with green eyes (I'll call her Green) sparks to life and leans in pointing at me
"You're the one from Fridays! You were dancing with us. You were good..."
She half smirks, half smiles at me and then looks at Blue and does the thing girls do where they telepathically communicate something to each other just by looking at each other. Now they're both leaning in and smiling so I lean back a little and smile back. We get talking about random shit and end up on the topic of abortion. We figure out we're all pro-choice but I can smell a shit test coming along which isn't helped by the fleeting surges of paranoia from the comedown of coke. Sure enough it comes from Blue
"So if you were to get your girlfriend pregnant what would you do?"
"I don't have a girlfriend. Well not a girlfriend anyway."
"What do you mean?" Coming from Green. Fuck what do I mean?
"I've got a bunch of close chick friends but none of them are my girlfriend."
"But you've fucked them?"
"Yea a few of them." I can see her thinking about this. Fuck did I say the right thing? Blue interrupts my paranoia
"OK suppose you do have a girlfriend and you got her pregnant what would you do?"
"Well there's not much I can do, its her that's pregnant. I'd support whatever decision she makes but I wouldn't tell her what to do."
I can tell that they're both impressed by this but I was just being honest.
"Y'know that's the most fuckin' mature thing I've heard a guy say in a long time, most guys I ask about shit like that are like 'fuck that abort that shit!', fuckin' cunts."
As me and Blue are talking more about the moral and ethical implications of abortion, I feel a foot rubbing my leg. I look at Green and she's giving me a cheeky smirk so I give her one back and start playing footsie with her while talking to Blue. I eventually work my foot up her dress to the inside of her thigh and start rubbing her pussy with my toe. I can feel her getting wet and she blurts out
"We should go"
Blue looks at her suspiciously
"Why?"
"I'm over this place lets go back to the house and get high. You're welcome to come too." She says looking at me
Blue looks a little bit annoyed before smirking
"Oh I see"
"Nah I should really head home" I say, hoping they don't take my bluff too seriously.
"No! just come back with us for a bit." Green says
Blue just laughs and says
"You can leave after she's-"
"SERIOUSLY SHUT UP!" Green cuts over the top of her before smiling at me
"We're just gonna go to the toilet for a sec, wait right here"
Green drags Blue off and I head to the bar and get a shot of vodka and knock it back. I head back to where we were sitting and bump into Green and Blue
"Where were you I thought you'd ran away!" Green says.
We head out and walk back to their place which is in the Valley so we've got quite a hike. We get talking about random things which get more and more sexual. I ask
"So why do girls hate getting their arse grabbed."
"Well we don't mind so long as it's not some dirty pedo or a fat drunk fuck." Says Blue
"So what if I did?"
"I wouldn't mind." Smiles Blue.
"No I'd love it." Green says, grinning at me.
So I go ahead and kind of lightly spank but grab a handful of their arse at the same time (they were standing either side of me so it was easy) while somehow ending up with both my index fingers on both of their pussies. Green actually gasps and grabs my shoulder but doesn't push me away. I take my hands away and put my arms around Blue and Green's waists. They put their arms round me too and we keep talking about shit. As we're walking back 2 guys walk past us and one of them says
"Hey Superman-" this pisses me off because I've heard it about 50 times that night "-you don't need 2 bitches give me one."
"Fuck off faggot" I retort downplaying my anger
"You calling me a faggot?"
I can feel a fight coming along and I'm still buzzing from the coke.
"Oi don't call my friend a faggot, cunt, we'll fuckin' kill you" The other one says.
I feel a rage coming on at this threat and I don't want to be ridiculed and threatened in front of these girls so, without really thinking, I step in front of Green and punch the nearest guy as hard as I possibly can in the jaw. He drops to the ground instantly and I think I've knocked him out. His friend punches me in the side of the head and, completely unexpectedly, Green grabs his head and slams her knee into his face. I stamp on his leg where his knee is from the side and he buckles to the ground. I see Blue kicking the guy who's already down in the face and we all lay into the other guy who's now on the ground kicking and stamping him till he blacks out too. Normally violence isn't a girls' domain, nor is it attractive to them, but I reasoned that these 2 girls weren't normal so they didn't seem to mind. We all ran off laughing, Blue in hysterics almost unable to run.
We had some more coke from a wrap in Blue's handbag and started ranting over the top of each other. We got some more bother from 4 guys who, again, called me Superman and hurled abuse until Blue chased them down the street with a switch blade. Something strange that happened while we were chinged up: we were walking along ranting about God knows what when Blue grabbed Green and started making out with her, grabbing her tits rubbing her pussy. Then Blue grabbed Greens hand and put it on my crotch where she could feel my growing erection. Then as quick as it happened it broke up and we kept walking as if nothing had happened. We got back to their place and I went to the toilet. I heard the girls talking to a guy and then the front door slam. I got a bit paranoid thinking they'd left or that I'd been set up. To distract myself from those thoughts I looked in the cabinet behind the mirror and saw an incredible amount of prescription drugs, all with different names or no name at all. I took some Desoxyn and a handful of random uppers and also 2 viagra pills and then another, washing them down with tap water. I walked out and saw the girls setting up a bong.
"Who was that guy?"
"Oh he just owns the house. Come sit down."
So I sat down in between Blue and Green and we all took turns on the bong. Then Blue pulled a shopping bag she had near us and tipped it out. It was full of Robitussin DX cough medicine. About 40 or 50 boxes worth of it.
"Apparently this shit gets you high like as if you're on K or PCP. Gotta take a fair bit though." Blue says.
We all have a few 100mL bottles of the stuff, washing it down with some cruisers they've got. They stick the music channel on the massive plasma screen they've got and we watch it for about 10 minutes. Nothing's happening so we have 2 more bottles. I've later figured out that we took 20mg/kg of body weight of DXM (or even more for the skinny girls) which is a ridiculous amount to take. Nothing's happening still and Blue goes off into another room leaving me and Green. I know I have to start kinoing her now before it gets awkward so I say
"Hold out your arms"
She does so I slowly drag the back of my fingers along them and I can see she likes it.
"Ooh that feels so good."
"It's cus you're high." I say and laugh. She laughs too and starts smiling at me.
I sit over on the sofa and say
"Come over here I'll give you a massage, so long as you promise to give me one too."
I start giving her a massage which starts off nice and soft and ends up being hard and powerful. My dick's harder than its ever been in my life and its pressing into her back as she leans back more and more. She's letting out little moans and she's grabbing my thighs as she leans further back. I'm horny as fuck and I simply can't take it so I grab her tits from behind and bite her neck. She swings round and I think I'm gonna get slapped or worse but she starts making out with me and pushes me back onto the sofa. She pulls her dress off and I'm surprised to see she's wearing nothing underneath. Anyway we start fucking like crazy, and, thinking she might be into it, I pull out and slowly side it into her arse. She looks a bit uncomfortable so I stick my fingers up her pussy and rub her clit with my thumb and she starts moaning again. About 10 minutes into it, Blue wanders out in just panties and a bra and sits cross-legged in front of the TV. She switches the playstation on and starts playing GTAIV, gets bored and puts the adult channel on on Foxtel. She starts playing with her tits and then her pussy a bit but gets bored of that too. The whole time she seems completely oblivious to me and Green. She stands up, takes her panties off, and wordlessly straddles my face. While I'm eating her out I go to grab her tits with my free hand but she slaps it away. I start feeling a little bit used but I don't give a shit. Blue half turns round and starts making out with Green. I'm trying extremely hard not to cum, thinking about maths problems in my head and gory things I've seen, maggot infested corpses and beheadings but it's not really working. I instead try and concentrate on untensing all the muscles in my body and my breathing, although it is a bit restricted haha. I strain my face and neck, keeping as much blood above my neck as possible, before releasing it just before I black out, buying me a bit more time each time I do it. Eventually I just can't hold back and cum, but strangely enough I'm still hard so I keep fucking. Blue's watching the TV and then her eyes roll back in her head and her abdomen and her hips kind of spasm, the only indication (apart from squirting in my mouth) that she's came before she gets off, shakes her leg out, and wanders off. Eventually Green cums and screams out so fucking loud my ear nearly bursts before collapsing on top of me. I'm still inside her but I leave it there and switch over to the music channel. After about 10 minutes I start to feel the effects of the cough medicine which is about the time when all the weirdest music videos come on (I swear every time I get high the weirdest shit comes on the TV).
Anyway it very quickly got weirder and weirder and I started getting more and more delusional. I ended up having my sanity severely tested and was teetering on the edge of insanity. I saw and experienced things I cannot describe with words and thought I was talking to God and his angels who were actually aliens and all sorts of other shit. I had no sense of time at all so I have no idea how long I was fucked for but I eventually pulled myself out of it. Blue was lying on the sofa completely naked, staring at her hands intently. Green was lying on the ground passed out. I went over to Blue and waved my hand in front of her face. No response. I slapped her and shouted "WAKE UP!" but still no response. Then I turned around and saw a gun on the coffee table. I froze and thought 'fuck not this shit again'. I very nearly picked it up before realising how fucking stupid that would be. There were a couple of big books on the table and one of them was open. Every page was a sheet of LSD. Now I've been looking for LSD for a long time so I tore a page out and shoved it in a shopping bag along with a couple boxes of Robitussin DX and a wrap of coke from the 20 or so that were on the table. Then quickly got the fuck out of there, got on the train home, and promptly passed out on my bed.
What I've learnt here is that kino is king almost always, not to drink a lot of cough medicine, and dancing is a good way to escalate things with strangers.
However, I'm having a break from going out clubbing for now as I'm starting to get WAY behind with my uni shit and I need to promptly find a job before I completely run out of money.
Also, I'm sick of having either boring as fuck nights where I'm severely disappointed and don't succeed with any girls or bizarre and fucked up nights where I always end with a bunch of psychos and fuck-ups and end up screwing at least one crazy girl.
So for now my sarging nights are over (till I get on top of uni and start getting monies).
_________________
"Has anything you've done made your life better?"
"I watched a snail crawl along the edge of a straight razor. That's my dream. That's my nightmare. Crawling, slithering, along the edge of a straight... razor... and surviving."
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