getting over AA. and wat to say after opener dies



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PostPosted: Fri Apr 10, 2009 11:40 pm 
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im gonna post this since its like one of the most comon questions... if u dont agree.. dont use it. dont flame tho cuz this works for ppl i have helped and for me in the beginning.....

canned stuff is weak.... if u have to use it to open but fyi.. u can just open with whatever the girl is wearing.. or one of her friends is wearing.. i saw a guy with sunglasses on in a CLUB chat up this 8.5... after 3 mins when he crashed... just walked up to her and said "ud be the best to settle this debate im having.... do u think sunglasses in a club is absolutely ridiculous... "

just fyi. as for where to go after tho... this seems to kill everyone who starts out...

its funny cuz most ppl have soo much to talk about too.... but for ME when i started and with a lot of ppl i think they confuse AA. as in.. you may be a pro at opening.. how can u not be .. heres an opener: "hey I'm Chester"

but if u donno wat to say after.. and you KNOW you dont know what to say after.. then ur not gonna bother opening..... there seems to be the big problem.. if you actually have a fear of appraching girls.. then... thats a problem...

get a piece of paper.. write down as many.. no less than 15 things you enjoy and know something about.... us tellin u stories and crap to memorize is gonna be tough.. best to sell yourself. the real events that are u....

so for instance

psychology
Criminal Minds
Michael Jackson going broke and going on tour again
wanting to work for the FBI in missing persons
song writing
snowboarding
japan
cool watches
languages
motorbikes
owning a house
mini coopers
ufc
rock climbing
kayaking
my blind cat

and the list goes on but i like to think i know everything.... so anyways.. read it over a million times everyday.. still you can recite wats on the list ..then USE it....... all the time. be fun. original and smooth... if those things are the real you then i sure u have at least one (probably 100) stories around each topic listed...

EXAMPLE: (am gonna write this as a run on as it would pretty much flow.. only my side of the conversation cuz at first thats all ur gonna get anyways)

so if i met a girl in a club with an opener about her hair tie looking like a james bond weapon...and say something like

"haha.. no really are you a spy?...no? youre a cop then eh...? u look a lil small to be a cop..but u have a fire in ur eye. do u work out at all?"
"oh yah the gym??.. i dont go to the gym too much. but i spar a lot... u kno wat sparring is? ok ok. sorry... i just had to ask u know..a lot of girls dont .. haha.... u watch UFC? OMG did you see Penn totally get is ass kicked by GSP.... im actually in the same weight class is him..." "no no i dont fight in the UFC... im too dangrous.. they wouldnt let me in.. .. so ur not a cop eh.. what do u do then? have u ever thought about being a cop? thats cool. and ya i have actually. i own my own business but i was thinking about goin into law enforcement.. to join the fbi missing persons division.... u ever watch the show Without a TRace? YA I LOVE IT TOO!! omg... this is crazy do i know you? u sure? ok well... wouldnt you love to be the one that finds that mising child and brings them home.... i was lost in Toronto one time when i was 11 and... its a sad story.. all i had was my little bear and i was running through the city... come here let me tell you about it.....


i have a million things to say about ufc and other crap on my list.. and stuff that isnt on the list.... just dont let up.. memorize your list.. dont memorize stories.. u have the stories memorized.... u can relate anything she says back to one of the many things u have a story or event to talk about.... as long as its not canned specific.... i coulda went into how i rock climb.. snowboard.. kayak.. i was in whistler twice this year... japan's biggest ski resort.. niseko for boarding.... the ppl were friendly.... i actualyl speak japanese (this is shocking cuz im white) blah blah blah....

hope this helps... trust me on the list.... DONT rely on canned stuff too much.. WRITE down a quick list about YOU.. dont copy my list.. make ur own....


then once ur someplace else.. u can do fun things. like the cube game.. is actually a fun game...or ask silly questions like whose ur favourite.. and then tickle or poke gently to get closer...just touch n play until ur ready to kiss... this stuff here should come naturally. it does to me so its hard to explain but if it doesnt. it will when u get there enuff... good rule is..
if YOU feel like now would be a good time to kiss her but ur not sure how she will take it...... then DO IT..... if u feel it... then she prolli thinks the same...

also if the convo does go dry after u iso'd.... as in like 3 seconds of silence passes and ur crashing after doing so well... kiss her.. and if shes shocked.. say "the convo was dying down....now we have something to talk about " then wink


now dont think about any of this shit. just LEARN ur list so its in ur head.. then dont think when ur there. thats the only thing u should remember DONT THINK..
one of the dudes in RSD i watched once said "see hot girl.. get hot girl"

use that as a rule... in conjunction with the 3 second rule... with ur list LEARNED.. u will have things to say on the spot.. just like when someone changes lanes into u.. u honk and move without thinking.. its learned....

enjoy


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PostPosted: Sat Apr 11, 2009 7:44 am 
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um....wtf is your point?

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PostPosted: Sat Apr 11, 2009 10:24 am 
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So what your saying is that interrogating girls until you find common ground, and forcing your company onto them is the right thing to do?


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PostPosted: Sat Apr 11, 2009 11:54 am 
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Nah, i feel what exactly you're saying dude and I totally agree. Before I leave the house to go out I bring with me a list with a few keywords. I think what you're trying to say is there exists middle ground between 100% improvised, unprepared interactions, and 100% robotic, pre-programmed, canned interactions.

And I agree that problems occur after the opener. The problem I face isn't with opening, or even with running out of things to say. Its often with segwaying - if I have too many convo ideas in my head, I'll sometimes bring them in awkwardly. But its never that bad. Any random convo is better than talking about the weather, what they do for a living and how their night is going.

And other dude, I don't know where you got that he's implying what you should fire away all kinds of questions. I hate being Mr.Obvious, but every time he uses "..." in his example conversation, its showing where the girl would respond. When I walk into a club, I'm not dripping of social value, so when I open a girl with social value, I have to use the 90/10 rule, cuz she aint about to try to make the conversation interesting.

Anyways, cool post dude, I'll keep it in mind


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PostPosted: Sat Apr 11, 2009 3:09 pm 
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good advice man thanks.


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PostPosted: Sat Apr 11, 2009 4:24 pm 
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Quote:
um....wtf is your point?
apparently u missed it.. but wtf is urs?
i said if u don't like the advice move on....

Quote:
So what your saying is that interrogating girls until you find common ground, and forcing your company onto them is the right thing to do?
NBT, dirtysoaps comment was good.
Keep in mind whenever u approach anyone with the intention of "getting to know them" you are "forcing ur company upon them".. word it however u want. if she dont want you there tho she will tell u to fuk off right off the bat or part way in...so i dont get how u take that away from my post... what do YOU do when when u approach? "hey ur cute" and wait for them to talk YOU up?.. good luck with that.


FYI i said i was only posting ONE side of the conversation because the responses aren't important and/or understood by my next remark anyways.. as dirty said... there are responses in there... its not interrogating. its a conversation. but i didnt use the ... at ALL points where there should be response. after i finish a sentence she usually responds. so just a . i thought this would be assumed. lol... wow..

my point was exactly to have a list of things that are genuinely you.. so at some point of the conversation you can throw them in...when they relate so its not seeming awkward or forced. my example wasn't an interrogation at all.. and the common ground was the tv show and UFC which she LOVED.. but it would be a bit akward and forced to walk up to a random and say "hey do you like without a trace?" she says "uh.. ya why?" "id love to work blah blah" she says... "thats great... why do i care where u wanna work?" .... its good to lead up to it some way...

but if some other way works for you.. do it up... i like doing it this way cuz i like real conversations and getting real info on the person to see if i actually like them (flirty at the same time)... rather than useless banter about super heroes and flossing...


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PostPosted: Sat Apr 11, 2009 7:31 pm 
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And I think useless banter can be good too if it's genuinely yours. Good post though. A bit difficult to read, I would rather you not type like a little kid...but the advice is pretty solid


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