Okay so first off, every weekend or so i hang out with some girls and some of my buddies and there is always this one cute girl there. After a few times hanging out with her, you could say i have gotten friendly with her. So one night when i was completely trashed/wasted, i was sitting out side on some girls patio on a bench chair thing, and soon after some weird ugly girl whom i loath comes over and tries to put some moves on me, which was extremely weird at the moment, you know putting legs on me and shit, and i completely realized what she was trying to do, Soon after i go inside and i see this cute girl from earlier and i remember her trying to ask for my number but me acting like an idiot, sorry im trying to remember this and i was pretty messed up, i never got to giving it to her, and so about 2 weeks later i see this girl again, And she seems to be taking interest in one of my friends (a rad gnarly surfer dude type), you know, asking him to be pong partners with her, etc, annoying stupid things like that, but soon after he left, i was with this girl, and she was acting weird towards me, and telling em how she thought this kid was cute and she wanted to hook up with him, but also how she thought i was cute and wanted to hook up with me also, but since that other girl from before when i was out on the patio was trying to hook up with me she thought i didnt want to get with her, after telling her i didnt have any attraction to that girl whom i loath, we ended this awkward conversation and i asked for number and she gave it to me, and as her name she put _______ is sexy, you know the usual drunk girl bull, and she told me to text her the next day to ask if she was coming to my other friends house for a party, and of course i never did text her because im not really smooth unless i have some alcohol in my system, you know, which im not sure if it was the right move or not because she did say before i left that i better text her etc, but now when i think of it i should of texted her the next day, But my final question after that huge long barrage of words is, How do i make myself more desirable over my friend who just so happens to be a rad surfer dude type with a bland personality, meanwhile im an in shape "good looking" kid who is pretty good at guitar, (Not gona lie, this has gotten me places in the past) sorry if i sounded like a deuschbag in my post, im just really tired right now

I would like to say that I have been in your position before. In my early experiences with women getting plastered and watching my game unfold before me from a seemingly numb position was my mo. I cant say I dont reflect on those times with a sense of nostalgia, but they are a part of what brought me here today. This is my first post but I feel I could offer you insite. First off, I would like to recommend that next time all of you hang out together you try to limit the alcohol, thats the sure fire way to level your game into a nosdive to which there is no escape. Unless this girl is obliterated too and you want to take advantage of a borderline conscious girl. Im not saying its a horribly wrong thing to do, but from your post I gather you care a bit about this girl from the description of background and the time spent on the girl. If you cant limit your alcohol consumption then i say avoid it all together. Next, you want to juxtapose yourself from your buddy, the surfer dude, to whom she was also interested. I dont know your style and in my beleifs its best to not try to be someone your not, but that does NOT mean you cant change how you act. My ideas on best approach is next time your all together do NOT immediately address her and act nervous. Most important is to always keep your cool. When you are around her talk to her friends, but avoid the obstacle, the girl who is all over you. Clearly you already have a rapport and need not open with this girl. After a couple of minutes of addressing business as usual its time to make your move. Open to her with a neg, sublte preferably and do not fully face her or lean in to her, always keep your composure. THen return to your other friends and conversation. If she replies open up a little more to her with your posture, and drop another neg, this time however do NOT turn back around but be sure after your drop it that your smilling and maintaining eye contact (vital). If she holds your gaze begin throwing around some fluff about the week and try to establish kino like an arm grab as soon as possible. If she does Not hold your gaze but breaks it and smiles then you know your in control and can manuever how best you see fit. It seems from your story that its just a rush game between you and your friend. These methods can get you an in but if you need to stand out against your friend the best way I think for your situation is the cocky funny approach. THis method is designed to grab her attention and keep it focused on you. Again it involves opening with a neg, then like its nothing ask if she would like to go to a random concert or random event coming up. If she says yes then respond with something like "well good tickets are however much and you can pick me up at 7." If she says no respond with" and i thought you liked going out and having fun". Obviously she will say yes, then you can slowly play this mind game with her until you get her realizing how much of a hippocrite she is. Now you have established presence against the other guy. Its all about being the light in the darkness, stand out among your friends and keep mindfull of the game. Hope this helps

wow haha, that is quite a response, it sounds like a good plan, I will be sure to try that one out next time, I think it would be a little weird for me to act cocky though because i am known as being the nice "sensitive" one, lol, but i think i want to read up a little on kino or what ever its called, sounds like its pretty important lol

shit i think this girl is pissed at me cause i didnt text her or some weird shit like that, She didnt reply to my comment on facebook, what are some good excuses for why i didnt text her? im thinkin maybe changing one digit in her phone number and telling her i texted her so it looks like i had the wrong number, shit, I know for a fact she saw my comment on her facebook because she answered all of her other comments except for mine, FUCK

Well if nothing else you know for a fact that your in her head. She made a conscious decision when she saw your comment, she had to stop and think about YOU individually. Im not a huge fan of dealing with stuff like this on the web however. Thus my recommendation is to talk to her in person, but most importantly the whole time make it seem like everything is just no big deal, do NOT get overly emotional which hints that she has control of you. A good way to judge her opinion on you if you talk in person is if you open the conversation talking to her , but with your body not directly facing her, perhaps at a 45 degree angle. As the conversation progresses if you dont like what your hear gradually shift more of your body away from her. This closes you off from her forcing her to crave more and more of your attention, fundamentaly increasing desire. Also, you should some what shift body weight away while rotating your body's "open-ness" away from her, a subconscious trigger that you intend to leave if she does not present a reason to stay. If all goes well during the conversation feel free to shift SLOWLY toward her, however do not lean in unless you want to go kino to try to escalate an opportune moment. (Going kino(my functional definition)-making contact in a non direct sexual way at precise moments to trigger or escalate the moment leaving her with an increased desire for more contact). Im not one to give any suggestions about what to do online because it lacks the element of human human contact where 90% of what is being said is non verbal ie. body language, gestures, posture, eye contact... Best bet is next time you and her are in the group isolate her, not immediately, but as the group is involved in something and test this out. I think it could help. As far as the text goes I would not worry about it, you have no obligation to text her, and plus you were both "wasted", so Im sure you could use that too. Sorry about the length of the responses but I try to be thorough. Best of luck mudbone, if you have any more questions and you think I could help feel free to send me a message, if what im saying is not usefull let me know, I am always up for constructive criticism.

First of all, I'd like to say that I completely agree with Slip, he obviously knows what he's talking about. I just have a neat little trick I read (online, I think?) if a girl won't respond to your messages.

Usually if the girl stops responding to messages, it's a bad sign, and I believe that you should stop messaging her / move on, BUT if you're desperate, try giving her this message:

"I was just [doing something, like passing by your dorm, scrolling through my phone, etc.] and I thought of the cutest nick name for you!" And then when she responds, just basically bust her balls and make her work for the nick name. And if you can't actually think of a funny nick name, just never tell her, change the subject, and she'll eventually forget. I tried it once, and an HB8 who hadn't returned 2 facebook messages in about a week's time responded to me in 3 minutes with that comment.

I think it's a good way to reestablish contact with a girl, but usually a last resort.

Also, a short disclaimer: I'm fairly new myself, so take what I say with a grain of salt. Best of luck!

ok so i see this girl again at a party, last friday, and so we are hangin out for like 20 min, and she then asks to see my phone, me being a dumb ass, i hand her my phone, forgetting that i didnt change any digits in her phone number so it looked like she gave me the wrong number, She then checks and sees that i had the right number, and starts acting weird and mad because i didnt text her, me taking advantage of this situation, i made it look like it didnt phase me, like she actually said, blah blah you didnt text me, and i just simply replied "i forgot" so after hanging out with this girl for a few more hours i decide to leave to head back to my friends house, as we gave our hugs, she whispered into my ear, dont text me cause i wont answer, not sure in what way to take this, i laugh it off, the next day, i decide to text her, and as soon as i tellher who it is, she responds, "oh so now you text me because i told you to, even though i know you dont really want to" This immediately made the conversation awkward, but i played stupid, and we texted for a good solid hour and a half, at one point i asked her if she wanted me to keep her name as _____is sexy in my phone contacts, and she said yes, then i followed that up with, so is that your name in everyones phone books, and she says no, lol, but after a good hour and a half i asked her what she was doing that night, she didnt respond, bitch, lol, but anyways, I dont think i should of had such a long conversation with her, it may of made me look submissive. does it sound like this girl is interested?

It just seems like you keep trying to qualify yourself to her. YOU are the prize, not her. When she gets mad, play cocky & funny. When she says how she's mad that you haven't texted her, tell her you have a life, and she should get one too, and switch the subject. I'd say it's not a lost cause, but don't put up with any of her sh*t. Once you start doing that, you're telling her that it is okay, which it IS NOT!