Hi, newbie namaste here. I dated a 7 I met on myspace on friday night at a club. There was much kino involved, but I couldn't kiss close and to top it off the next encounter involves her friends.

I live in Argentina and she is a lovely 21 year old Colombian. She has one complaint about me, namely that I don't smile fully, only smirk (I moronically introduced her to the show Lie to Me).

The reason for that is that I need a certain level of self assertion, and need to pull out the Clint Eastwood *from time to time* to feel better. Adopting that posture all the time would kill things, I know.

So how much does the kino count? At certain points she put my arms around her and trust me, I smiled a heck of a lot more than I ussually do, as I'm starting to change certain attitudes.

There are, as you may know, three types of kino
Light kino: handshake, high fives, punching her shoulder etc
Medium kino: Pushing/pulling, tickling, one-arm hug etc
Heavy kino: Touching the face, touching lips, close hugs, kissing etc

If you receive kino, then yes, this is an IOI, the more "heavy" the kino, the more she is interested in you. If, as you're saying, she took your arms and put them around herself, then I would consider this major IOI.

Of course, she might be one of those people who are naturally touchy-feely, don't put too much emphasis on one aspect of the interraction. Check the IOI list to see which signals she was giving you. If you have more than three, go for the kiss

I'd say the kino was medium. The only other thing I concentrated on was gazing deeply into her eyes. I tried to find an opportunity to neg her but it didn't arise. I got off msn with her, we've been commenting on each other's myspace photos (childish but who cares).

It's a good thing I've been focusing on the Tao of Steve's first rule, don't feel desire, because by now I probably wouldn't have kept her interested.

Keep in mind that while a neg is a powerful tool in the PUA's toolbox, it shouldn't be used on each and every girl. If she's already into you, negging her is totally out of place. A neg should be used in the beginning of the interaction, to disarm the BS and make her feel attraction, not when you already are kinoing and gazing lovingly into each other eyes

I see what you mean. What I did try along those lines was not putting up with bull, which is totally new to me, but seems to be working. I know it's as old as kitten string theory itself, but I realize that not agreeing to everything and to stop being apologetic works well for my ego and seems to draw a line for the opposite sex.