What to do when she has told me to leave her alone?



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SummerNight
PostPosted: Mon Mar 09, 2009 8:07 am 
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I think I have totally crashed and burned with this one but can u say what I did wrong?

I wrote to a girl on social site, where everybody has their profiles to catch up old friends and so on. It's not a dating site but just social site.
Quote:
Me: Are u shy?
HB: ?!?!?! :D:D:D
Me: I have been to this site for ages but you still haven't come to talk to me. Are you even brave enough to talk to people? :D
HB: Like, wtf, who are u? :D:D Yea, I am brave enough to talk to people :D:D haha :D :D
Me: How silly of me, I didn't introduce myself. I am ***. So your saying that you are not one of those who isn't brave enough to talk to people and sits in the corner. :D Hmm, suspicious...you left me that impression...like very shy girl...isn't brave enough to look into eyes, more of a peeper...one who stays close to walls when she walks in hallways... :D
HB: Silly of you or not, I really don't give a sh*t. I don't give shit what you think of me. If I am suspicious to you or not, think what you want :D
Me: Omg... I never knew we had so much in common :D
HB: I'm all tears, you like totally know me also. :D
Me: Are you always so rusty with people? :D Ok, to get to know you better, I ask a question, if you were a dessert then which?
HB: I am, I am, I am so cool. Why is that your business which dessert I would be :D Haha, non of you business.
Me: Wau...such a blocker :D Uu...I understand, you're that kind of chick who doesn't eat dessert and instead eats grass, cause they said in Cosmopolitan that it's good and healthy.
HB: So I'm so cool? :D:D I'm definitely eating grass :D:D:D And I'm not reading Cosmopolitan :D
Me: Crazy, even on holidays you can't have dessert? :D And also, what are so little girls doing up so late? :D (she wrote me 5.30 AM, and she is about 17)
HB: Who said I can't have dessert? Why is that you business? I'm up when I want, non of your business.
Me: Uu...and here it comes again...self defence reflex is powerful :D Really, why are you so edgy?
HB: OMF, leave me alone. non of your business.
Sry, it came so long, but I thought it's best to put it all in. Also, the conversation was not in English, this is my best translation :D

So, what did I do wrong and is it possible to save this one?
Thanks!
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jurupa
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 09, 2009 8:35 am 
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You did well thru the semi shit test the girl gave you up front. Saying that you made some errors or missed good opportunities. And you overall allowed her to keep the semi shit test coming to you. Tho there was a couple things that stood out to me:

Quote:
HB: I'm all tears, you like totally know me also. :D
Me: Are you always so rusty with people? :D Ok, to get to know you better, I ask a question, if you were a dessert then which?
I would have gone with a more cocky funny reply to this by saying "Need a tissue? But lets not get carried away now. I don't know you that well yet."
Quote:
HB: Who said I can't have dessert? Why is that you business? I'm up when I want, non of your business.
Me: Uu...and here it comes again...self defence reflex is powerful :D Really, why are you so edgy?
HB: OMF, leave me alone. non of your business.
Negs really don't work online and should pretty much stayed away from. You also didn't let go of the desert thing when it was obvious that she was not going to reply to you about it. So you should have change the topic to something that was more interesting and fun then grilling her on desert.
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SummerNight
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 09, 2009 8:53 am 
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So am I done with this one or is there a famous Rocky comeback?
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Mungojerry
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 09, 2009 1:04 pm 
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Quote:
Me: Are u shy?
HB: ?!?!?!
Me: I have been to this site for ages but you still haven't come to talk to me. Are you even brave enough to talk to people?
In my experience, this opener gets a high response rate, but it's pretty difficult to transition from.
Quote:
HB: Like, wtf, who are u? Yea, I am brave enough to talk to people haha
Me: How silly of me, I didn't introduce myself. I am ***. So your saying that you are not one of those who isn't brave enough to talk to people and sits in the corner. Hmm, suspicious...you left me that impression...like very shy girl...isn't brave enough to look into eyes, more of a peeper...one who stays close to walls when she walks in hallways...
This is awful! Stop sticking to the same thread, these things get boring very fast.

Also you're now just insulting her AND appearing try-hard at the same time!
Quote:
HB: Silly of you or not, I really don't give a sh*t. I don't give shit what you think of me. If I am suspicious to you or not, think what you want
Exactly!
Quote:
Me: Omg... I never knew we had so much in common
HB: I'm all tears, you like totally know me also.
Me: Are you always so rusty with people? Ok, to get to know you better, I ask a question, if you were a dessert then which?
You can't transition to playful conversation after insulting her. People need to be in a good mood before being playful - you've not elicited any positive emotions!

It shows very low value on your part - why are you pursuing someone you have just communicated you dislike? It comes across as desperate and *a bit* harassing.
Quote:
HB: I am, I am, I am so cool. Why is that your business which dessert I would be Haha, non of you business.
She's not playing because you've been a dick and insulted her. She is the one reacting normally here!
Quote:
Me: Wau...such a blocker Uu...I understand, you're that kind of chick who doesn't eat dessert and instead eats grass, cause they said in Cosmopolitan that it's good and healthy.
If the fist insult doesn't work, piling on another isn't going to. Cocky-funny is difficult to get right online - but you're not being funny at all, you're just insulting her.
Quote:
HB: So I'm so cool? I'm definitely eating grass And I'm not reading Cosmopolitan
Me: Crazy, even on holidays you can't have dessert? And also, what are so little girls doing up so late? (she wrote me 5.30 AM, and she is about 17)
This is insulting and a bit creepy.
Quote:
HB: Who said I can't have dessert? Why is that you business? I'm up when I want, non of your business.
Me: Uu...and here it comes again...self defence reflex is powerful Really, why are you so edgy?
HB: OMF, leave me alone. non of your business.
The correct response is to leave her alone . Then read through some of the full transcripts of online closes on this forum and the other big PU forums.
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SummerNight
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 09, 2009 1:30 pm 
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Ok, thank you...It's hard to get the cocky-funny right, sometimes I'm very successful and sometimes...well, you saw what that was :D
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Different Cloud
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PostPosted: Mon Mar 09, 2009 4:30 pm 
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The advice has already been given above, read over that again and before you do anything else knowlodge yourself on NEGS, insulit after insulit after insulit isn't the way to do it.

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If you think you are beaten, you are.
If you think you dare not, you don't.
If you think you'll lose, you've lost.
--It's all in the STATE OF MIND--
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Patrick_Bateman
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 10, 2009 6:43 am 
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Stay away from picking girls up online.

And the whole conversation was going nowhere from the beginning, you just made fun of her the whole time. She also sounded like she didn't want to talk to you from around the beginning

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SummerNight
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 10, 2009 11:51 am 
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No...I'm not gonna stay away from picking up online. I just have to get better and learn more not just give up. No thanks for you your advice.
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Mungojerry
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PostPosted: Tue Mar 10, 2009 12:31 pm 
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Quote:
No...I'm not gonna stay away from picking up online. I just have to get better and learn more not just give up.
Exactly. It's a learnable skill and can be used to meet lots of high quality women online.

Most arguments against online game are based on pure machismo, not logic.
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nightrider767
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PostPosted: Wed Mar 11, 2009 6:42 pm 
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I thought this was a real deal breaker.
Quote:
And also, what are so little girls doing up so late?
The "little girls" thing used in that context just screams, "creepy old guy writing you".

This girl opened the door to you a little. You messed up. Next time have a funny joke or comment ready to turn that whole thing around when it goes in that direction.

Someone suggested you not try to sarge online. You say you still want to. I agree,,, if you're having fun, do it. Especially someone like you who is open and trying to learn from your mistakes and get better.


I always thought online sarging was for losers. But I've come to change my mind and consider a fairly interesting diversion.

Have fun.
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Novice1
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PostPosted: Sun Mar 15, 2009 8:13 am 
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Quote:
And the whole conversation was going nowhere from the beginning, you just made fun of her the whole time. She also sounded like she didn't want to talk to you from around the beginning
I don't agree with the not sarging online part, but I agree with the above.

It was pretty cringe-worthy. You had it at first, but lost it fairly early and didn't catch the hint.

Stay in the game, you'll get better.
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