Lots of people often ask me about day 2's. They want to know what they should do, where to go and are normally confused by all the different suggestions.
Firstly, there are lots of suggestions because there are millions of things you can do at a day 2 and to be completely honest it doesn't matter to much what you choose. But for anyone who wants a nice easy and successful plan, I will give you mine.
Before I get down to it tho, don't over plan! Trying to have a stick plan will end in disaster because eventually something will happen that will cause the plan to go wrong. Life is random, so it cant be avoided. If you have planned strictly and it goes wrong, you might find it hard to recover and it wont feel natural.
Right, here we go, this is my normal day 2. I use it a lot simply because its relaxed, non- pressured and cheap. I have had a lot of success with it and it always goes down really well, it is however aimed at my age group; 17. However, it should translate fine to any age. There are some things that might not be possible for you to do because of location, but just change it round to suit you. I will refer to the date as "she" just because its easier to type it out that way, it could be anyone.
1) Meet up at a coffee shop. This is a great way to start because its a nice public place and a great time to have some light conversation and get the comfort back from when you met. Basically, this is the time to just get used to being together. I normally agree here to pay for the drinks and she can pay for the activity later, I find this to be a very nice way to do things because it shows you can be a classic gentleman and pay but also shows that she shouldn't expect you to be a cash point.
2) Walk around the shops - this is again just to get used to being together and doing "normal" things. It nice and relaxed and there is lots of room for fun and interaction (trying on silly clothes, making jokes about items in a shop etc etc)
3) Go watch a movie! (A lot of people will tell you that a movie on a first date is awful, i totally disagree. The only reason its classically thought of as bad is because people do this first. They meet up at the cinema and talk for 5 mins then go and sit close together in a dark room and expect things to happen. Thats why we did some stuff first, to get used to being together.) I like comedy personally, so I always suggest a few films and we decide what to watch (normally a rom-com). I will normally say she can buy the popcorn or whatever since i got the coffee earlier and i will buy the tickets. In the movie dont be afraid to snuggle up, the reason you did those things before was to get comfortable and build up some kino. Put an arm round her or whatever, she wont reject if you did the right things in 1 and 2. The trick isnt to do it in the sly way you see in films, just do it in a confident - its meant to happen sort of way.
4) After the film, I tend to walk along the beach front with her (obviously if you don't live near the sea, switch this for something else). Talk about the movie, laugh about the jokes and move to more emotive conversation and if you didnt k-close in the movie or before that, this is the time to do it as long as it feels right (more on this in a min). When your ready say bye, say it was a great time (mention a specific thing that was great, something that you did together. It re-enforces how you and her make each other feel great) and whatever else. The end.
As for the k-close, do not plan a time to do it. Just escalate and build sexual tension (looking in her eyes, kino etc etc) and you will know when you are both ready. I do however strongly advise against going for a k-close at the end of the date. The reason i think this is an awful idea is because it is predictable and a pressured situation, she is either really wanting it or thinking she has to kiss you just to be polite and you are probably thinking this is your last chance. Either way, kissing at the very end of a date tends to be akward rather than natural.
There we have it, my nice easy day 2. Suggestions, comments, critics and questions all welcome
Madals
From Fin -
Thoughts On Flaking-
So maybe you use to be passed over when regarding girls? Well now that you are well dressed, got your act together, confident and have got game. …. Do you have ANY idea how intimidating you are to some women?
Seriously, I pretty much only work solo day game and, as a result my set time is around 5 minutes. And I’m betting that’s quite close to some of you other guys. As such rapport and comfort is minimal.
For easiness sake, I’ll assume your set time is longer… so here are some quick questions.
1. She has known you for literally 20 minutes; do you think she wants to head out on a dinner date? Wouldn’t that be overwhelming for her?
2. Isn’t that a bit overwhelming for most people INCLUDING men?
3. If she doesn’t know you very well, and your not sure you have a lot in common, how likely are “awkward pauses” (if you don’t know, a woman’s worst enemy)
Really, flaked day 2’s tend to come down to comfort and how well you know the other person, a WONDEREFUL trait to have in this game, and I don’t use that word lightly, is the ability to make people feel at ease. It not only means people are comfortable with you, but it is also a very attractive quality to have.
How to avoid flaking-
1. Make sure she will have the option to leave the date quickly with no social awkwardness. (Grabbing a coffee for ten minutes in between your business lunch with a work-mate and the bus you have to catch home is great, it makes it clear that there is no huge jump in investment)
2. Have some banter on the phone/online/whatever before asking her out.
3. Keep the day 2 “innocent” asking her if she wants to join you at the BDSM club is not going to get the same response as meeting for a cigarette during her lunch break.
Progression of the “date”-
I like to lump dates into three categories.
1. Casual chat. - Intentions to just have fun, “the cigarette break”.
2. Courting. – A definite sexual frame has been established, the goal of the date is primarily to get to know each other, and “theirs this cool coffee bar we could hit up around 3.”
3. Sexual. – Sexual frame is there and the date is looking like it’s going to end in sex, “I’ll cook you something to eat at my place”.
Admittedly most day 2’s or whatever you want to call them, are a mix of the three. Generally this is where learning to transition, interactions and vibes, comes in handy.
An example of my usual way.
1. # Close using my usual style of in (direct), - neither direct nor indirect.
2. Phone call, have fun.
3. Phone call set up day two.
4. Ben and Jerries
5. Naturally she has enjoyed my company, so she’s quite happy to go along with it when I suggest that we take a look at some of the clothing stores.
6. Bounce to a piano bar or cocktail lounge (I cannot stand most bars and clubs)
7. Take it from their depending on how the date is going so far.
Thoughts On Flaking-
So maybe you use to be passed over when regarding girls? Well now that you are well dressed, got your act together, confident and have got game. …. Do you have ANY idea how intimidating you are to some women?
Seriously, I pretty much only work solo day game and, as a result my set time is around 5 minutes. And I’m betting that’s quite close to some of you other guys. As such rapport and comfort is minimal.
For easiness sake, I’ll assume your set time is longer… so here are some quick questions.
1. She has known you for literally 20 minutes; do you think she wants to head out on a dinner date? Wouldn’t that be overwhelming for her?
2. Isn’t that a bit overwhelming for most people INCLUDING men?
3. If she doesn’t know you very well, and your not sure you have a lot in common, how likely are “awkward pauses” (if you don’t know, a woman’s worst enemy)
Really, flaked day 2’s tend to come down to comfort and how well you know the other person, a WONDEREFUL trait to have in this game, and I don’t use that word lightly, is the ability to make people feel at ease. It not only means people are comfortable with you, but it is also a very attractive quality to have.
How to avoid flaking-
1. Make sure she will have the option to leave the date quickly with no social awkwardness. (Grabbing a coffee for ten minutes in between your business lunch with a work-mate and the bus you have to catch home is great, it makes it clear that there is no huge jump in investment)
2. Have some banter on the phone/online/whatever before asking her out.
3. Keep the day 2 “innocent” asking her if she wants to join you at the BDSM club is not going to get the same response as meeting for a cigarette during her lunch break.
Progression of the “date”-
I like to lump dates into three categories.
1. Casual chat. - Intentions to just have fun, “the cigarette break”.
2. Courting. – A definite sexual frame has been established, the goal of the date is primarily to get to know each other, and “theirs this cool coffee bar we could hit up around 3.”
3. Sexual. – Sexual frame is there and the date is looking like it’s going to end in sex, “I’ll cook you something to eat at my place”.
Admittedly most day 2’s or whatever you want to call them, are a mix of the three. Generally this is where learning to transition, interactions and vibes, comes in handy.
An example of my usual way.
1. # Close using my usual style of in (direct), - neither direct nor indirect.
2. Phone call, have fun.
3. Phone call set up day two.
4. Ben and Jerries
5. Naturally she has enjoyed my company, so she’s quite happy to go along with it when I suggest that we take a look at some of the clothing stores.
6. Bounce to a piano bar or cocktail lounge (I cannot stand most bars and clubs)
7. Take it from their depending on how the date is going so far.
CHAT
