ok so theres this resturante my family and i go in sometimes we have been goin thre for like 4 years now and everytime i go in there thers a waitress and her and i always have staring batteles and always make eyes contact so after about the 4th occasion of me going theres and making eye contact i decided to go up to her and talk. so i caught her in the parking lot after she was off work and i was like "you know i com in here with my family sometimes and i see you looking at me and im looking at you so why dont we just hang out" and her face lit up a little bit with a smile and i was like "do u havge a boyfriend' and she was like "well yea" and i was like ohh alright and i kinda left it at that and walked away and didnt persue her at all after that.. and this wat back in May. i know i shouldnt have askd about a boyfriend because thats just stupid who cares about her bf. ne ways like i said this wat back in May and i havent been in there since. but it just so happends my mother, cousin and I went there last night and she was in there working and i sat at the bar with my family and th kitchen door was to the right of me so it was kind of hard to make eye contact with her. i think it was kind of like..you look at me wwen im not looking and i look at u wen ur not looking type of thing. but she came behind th bar twice which is right infront of me and the waitresses there never do that and my mom was saying she was tryn to get my attention by doing that. but i tried to be modest about it and just be like naa maybe she just had work to do over there. i admit tho i was playin it cool not looking at her as much because i was tryn to act like wat happend back in the parkin lot in may didnt bother me. for some reason i think me and this girl would hit it off so good and its meant to be..i dont know maybe..i talked to her cousin last time who also works there and she gave me the go ahead to talk to her she said shes nice and i should tlak to her and that was back in may but like i said wen i went thr yesrturday i just tried to act focust on my families conversations. i mean i know its a little weird for a girl to go out with a guy th first time they tlak because that is a little weird but idk what to do i dont wanna get shut down im a pretty goolookin dude i guess and shes beautiful.my cousin did sasy she was around us alot and my mom did too and said she was doin it on purpose but then again maybe she just had alot of work in my area..what do i do.i dont know what to do should i go in that resturante alone one night and be like hey listen u know that last time i didnt persue and heres my number and if u wanna tlak or go out then alright but if you dont then thats cool but if u dont thn o well i tried, give her my nuimbr and walk away? and see wat happens? idk imjust the type of guy that wont make a movee unles the girl makes it obv shes interested or i know she likes me or something..

First of all you said that she LITE UP when you talked to her in the parking lot,
right? That was a good sign where you should have pursued... it's ok, help is
on the way.

And you should not have asked her if she had a BF.. but, as stated a lot in a
lot of places, girls say they have a BF when they don't just to see if you will
still continue to go for her.

Your mom saying that she was doing that to get your attention was in fact
TRUE... like they say, who knows a woman best? That's right, another woman.

Listen to your mom when she tells you that a girl likes you, women know all
the clues that other women put off. Why do you think women get jealous
when another woman is talking to her man? They know the signs that show
this girl is in fact interested in her man.

Now, when this girls cousin (I think you said) said that you should talk to
her because she's a nice girl and whatever, then you should talk to her, if
her cousin is telling you this, then this cousin (and maybe more of the
family don't like her BF, if she does in fact have one).

I don't know how old you are, but if you are under 19 then you giving her
your number will pretty much guarantee a call back. But, you should not
only give her your number, but hand her a piece of paper also (or napkin)
and tell her, "Here's my number. Call me if you want an adventure... (hand
her another napkin) Write down your number here."

Or, if you have a cell phone, ask her what her number is and put it into
your phone right there.. (ask her if she has her phone on her)

If she has it on her say, "ok. I'm calling right now so you will have my
number."

If she don't, say, "ok. I'm calling you right now, and here (hand her napkin
with your number on it) this is my number so you know it's mine."

Then, you need to follow up right there on the spot with her and ask her,
"What are you doing after work tonight?" If she says that she is going home
to do homework or any other excuse that is believable, then just tell her,
"ok. I'll call you tonight around (time)."

If she says, "I don't know." Then this is an open invitation and you should
make a plan for you two to do something after she gets off work that night.

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alright well thats a good idea dude but i just found her online and shes 23 she graduated college last year and im 20 that kinda of makes me mad you know? what do i do now ? u think shell care about my age? like she can go to bars n shit and i cant really till novmber wen my bday comes around. what do i do i tohught she was aorund my age dammmit!

It don't matter about the age thing. If she wants to go to a bar/club just tell
her, "I don't feel like going, go get some drinks and meet me back at my
place (or wherever, a lake, etc)."

If she still wants to go to a bar/club and says that you should come just tell
her, "I don't feel like going I said, you go and have fun."

If she asks you how old you are, LIE TO HER... that's right, I said LIE TO HER.

Tell her you're 15. This will turn into a fun conversation, she won't believe
you anyways... then after a while, come clean and tell her that you're 21 or
22... but you don't feel like going to the clubs THAT NIGHT.

I am sure that you can work from here, so I'll cut this short.

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i feel that dude but i really feel like i could have somethin with her you know...u know wen u meet someone and it like u have known them for years thats how it feels..feels like shits supposed to happen with this girl u know even if i dont know her that good...and im still in college u know wat if shes like..im im graduated tryna get my life on track this kids a baby still in college.. and also if i lie about my age wat am i gonna do down the road?? am i gonna be like ohhh ya by the way i lied im really 20?? haha

and wat if she lit up the first time just to be nice..u know idk i know there was some obv signs at least thats wats my mom said and my cuz noticed her around..but like idk i try to be modest and be lik well wat if she was bein nice about it so she wasnt rude, mayb she just had work behind the bar and wasnt goin back there to look at me idk.

......or you can just go talk to her and give it a shot. There are always a million reasons not to do something. Forget about all those things you just said, because you never know. So what if you were misinterpreting things? You won't know till you go talk to her.

yes man i feel that ima be sad as shit if shs like naaa i gotta bf i cant but watever man i def gotta try damn.

As the poster above me said, Stop Being So Negative...

Negativity is the reason why so many have failed. Their minds play tricks
on them and revert back to the negative things that might happen.

You just need to tell that voice in your head to shut up and just do it.

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yea your right the only thing that concerns me is that shes 23 and im 20 and if shll care about that..should i tell her my real age or should i say im 21 but then wat do i tell hr if shit gets serious down the road..be like ohhhh ya im actually 20?

I only said for you to lie to her about your age since it seems to be such a
big deal to you.

Lie to her about your age, or don't. Which one do you think will help you get
this girl? That's you're younger than her? Or that you are the same age as
her?

Younger girls like older guys and older girls like younger guys.

Younger girls are the ages of 18-24.
Older girls are the ages of 25 and up.

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welli have been with older girls
when i was 18 i was with a 21 year old but that was my friends older sister and ive known her since i was like 14 so that wasnt hard. im just scared shes gonna be like naaa im outa of college and ur still 20, so im thinkin of sayin im 21 but it things get serious and i tell her im 20 i dont want her to think im a liar lol. like i see it in this girls eyes somthings gonna happen(i think). bcause basically when i was a freshman in high school she was a senior in high school and thats so hard to imagine myself doing that now ven though ive obv grown up alot since then idk im thinkin too much i tihnk?

you are definitely thinking too much.
Right now, you are just finding excuses because you're so nervous and afraid.
Forget about all that.
So what if she's 23? It's not like you're a kid or anything. You're almost graduating college. Say you didn't know her and if you met her at a party randomly, would you game her ?
If the answer is yes, which I'm guessing it is, then there should be no problem. The age difference between 20 and 23 does not have that many visible cues, so I wouldn't see why she would even be worried about that.

If you were a freshman in high school and she was a senior, then there would obviously be physical disparities between a guy your age and a guy her age, but at 20 years old, you're an adult already, and so is she, so go for it!

yes dude im def gonna go for it. but listen i went through some shit with my last girl i was in love with and we broke off in may i was diagnosed with depression and ever since this new girl came into play it completely took my mind off the old girl and the new girl is all i can think about..thats why im thinkin about it alot because this new girls actualy helping me clear my mind of the old girl and i want the this new girl to like me cuz if i get her then the old girl is gone outa my mind..the place she works at is kinda strict shes not usually standing around u know so im wondring if i should go up to her and hand her my number while shes working and be like uwont regret it..or catch her in the parking lot after shes done thats what i did last time i just dont know the best way to approach her again cuz last time it was kinda jus tlike ok u have a bf thats cool and didnt pursue but im just wondering wat i should do..i know in the end im just gonna turn on the smooth switch and do my thing but gimme some ideas!

This is straight up AFC talk...

You need to go into it thinking that you are the best thing for her. No other
guy can make her happy like you can.

Don't get the mind-set that you WANT a girl to like you. Go into it with the
attitude of you KNOW she will like you because you are this cool and
confident person.

You can approach her outside after she gets off of work again, sure... just
tell her inside that you will meet up with her outside when she gets off so
it's not like some "stalker" vibe going on when she walks out to her car.

Do not give her your number and walk away. Just wait until you two are
outside talking, and make it so that you are leaving before she makes the
decision...

If you make the decision to leave first, then you are conveying value to
her.. if she makes the decision to leave first, then she is showing that she
is more valuable than you.

When you get ready to make your exit, just tell her, "Well, I gotta jet, I
have friends coming over in a little bit..."
(turn like you are leaving.. then turn back and face her and say)
"Hey, (hand her a pen and paper or your cell phone) write it down or
put it in..."

If she asks, "What?" You just say, "Are you kidding me... your number girl, dang."

Then you got her number and can make your way back home and do whatever
you want to do... wait at least a day (most would say 2 days) and then
call her and make plans to meet somewhere.

If you do all of this, then we will be ready another post from you in a few
days... asking "what do I do now?"

And we will be ready for you bro... XD

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I have reviewed A LOT of PUA books, videos, etc. I only upload the ones that have the best information.