I've been noticing something lately. For the past month or so I've been working on correcting my body language, and my inner game, and I havn't even gone off on the full swing of things yet, yet I'm getting results already.

I'm finding that just by correcting my body language, I've become more comfortable in every day situations, and people notice me because I'm not the same as most, I look everyone in the eye, I take up space and get comfy whenever possible, and I go for kino very early in any interaction, even when its with a guy! I find just by doing these things alone, you build up your own state, and regardless of the sex of the other person, you get treated way differently, I think they can relate way better to you - and if that someone is a girl, that just makes it that much easier.

What do you guys think?

i always feel when I work on my body language and look ppl in the eye I come off as somebody who is a dick. I just feel like that is how I look because my chin is up and my shoulders are back. am I wrong here? or am I possibly right and I'm just doing something small wrong? but ya body language is huge

Just don't stare people down, eye contact is Huge... you are probably just coming off more alpha than some of the other dudes there. Don't worry about it.

My body language has improved a lot in the past few weeks, yet I've barely spent one conscious moment working to improve it.

Guys, the self ultimately shines through. I will often go out and intentionally use the worst, most squirrelly body language I can, and people still say I have good body language.

If you think that simply fixing body language is going to make you look more confident, you're wrong. You may be able to hide insecurity for a while, but it will ultimately be sub-communicated no matter how good your patented "alpha male body language" is.

In fact, if a needy, insecure person works too hard on body language, they can come across as really weird.

I have allways had good body language, but what i recently learned is how to gauge other people body language...

On a basic levle by mirroring somones body language you can make them feel comfdurable, it is funny to see how far you can get before they notice (you will be really suprised) you can also gauge how much they are into you by seeing if they copy your body language (people do it without knowing it) and you can do little tricks (grab your package and they grab theirs) which can get them into a sexual state of mind.

Getting more complicated here, people look different ways depending on what sense they are using, by paying close attention you can match your words to the sense they are currently using- if you pick up clues that they are in a 'touchy' state you use words like "i feel that" "i was touched" blah blah, if they are currently auditory "that rings a bell" "i hear you" blah blah...

I agree with this completely. You're right that who you are inside will show through, that's why I am working on my inner game at the moment as well. A lot of this stuff is really just about building a comfortable mindset.

Body Language is communicating Inner Game.
At least that's my understanding.

So as I've gotten better Inner Game, I've calibrated the Body Language to communicate this.
That I am relaxed in any situation, unless I have good reason to not be (like a house on fire or something).

Kino is good.
Eye Contact is good.

If I notice that a guy is trying to out-stare me, I relax, let my attention flow around the room as well, so that he gets space to relax.
( men get tense by prolonged eye-contact, as you noted earlier in this topic.)

The Definitive Guide To Body Language


buy it.

body language is very important i believe to life in general.

After i improved my posture and smiled more i noticed that i stood out in groups more and that i had more success with women.

It might not be an overly dramatic change but with enough encouragement with each change you find yourself becoming more and more of the alpha male.

When I started smiling, looking people in the eye, and speaking more slowly and from the diaphragm I noticed INSTANT results in how everyone treated me. It was kind of a double edged sword when I interact with other guys, they seem to be a little resentful and jealous.

I don't exactly agree with that fixing your body language is wrong. Walking around looking at your feet WILL make you feel different. It's like breathing exercises help you relax... the physiological change that you purposefully cause induces certain emotions in you. However, this is temporary.

On the other hand, I do agree that your inner self will shine through. You'll be incongruent.

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I agree with charlie because when I began with becoming more alpha I worked alot on my body language. Like Charlie says, you feel different and I noticed that other people where more open too me when I was more open too them. This helped me alot in inner game too because I began to think that I could be who ever I want if I just think like that. This thought may not be fully true but it surely makes you alot more confident.

I totally agree with this. I used to be really shy, now I've become more confident using this shit, but I'm still very quiet. I hardly say anything yet I seem to have body lanuage sorted and I manage to get f-closes without even having to have a decent conversation.

Yea its pretty ridiculous how much having correct body language will set you apart.

I wont even be looking for shit to happen, and Ill have girls open me or start some shit...

That and you can see it happen elsewhere, If your standing out and holding yourself differently from other guys itll catch certain girls eyes right way. Be surprised whos taking glances and staring when you come into a room like that.

Simple changes make all the difference.

I've started to correct my body language in school and I'm noticing a HUGE difference in my self-esteem. I try to relax, lean really back in my chair, and spread my legs out under the desk while talking to girls. Then I look over to this girl (sitting next to me) that has a crush on me (haha i know... a "crush") and I realized she is kinda turned towards me with her torso, and she's fidgeting whenever I look at her. Being aware of my own body language has made me notice other people's body language more, and I can more easily read it.

What I love the most is when I am the most comfortable. As Sinn has stated, the most comfortable person in the room has the most social power (something along the lines of that). I can be all laid back, C&F, and just seem like an awesome guy that's really easy to talk to. Oh yeah, one GREAT thing about being comfortable is that there are less awkward silences! I don't feel inclined to have to talk about something when I'm sitting with new girls at the lunch table. Just today I could so easily see how hard this girl was trying to keep the convo going, and she looked nervous.

I've also started to stand up straight when I walk and it really brings out my chest. Learn to do this while looking RELAXED though! Shoulders should be "resting back," (don't think "pulled back" or "shrugged"). My friends are starting to say that I'm getting diesel or that I'm on steroids, and a few girls told me that I should model for clothing companies (like abercrombie, even though I DESPISE that style).

All of this from working on my body language! Man, this site is awesome, I love it. Especially when I look back on how quiet and modest I used to be.