Exactly . . . nobody wants sex to become some sort of favor owed.

On the one hand, I would be very annoyed if a guy asked me to pay to dinner, or even, my part of dinner. I would take it as a sign of rudeness and never see him again.

On the other hand, I always insist on paying for my share (even though the hope is that I won't have to but I'd have a problem doing it) or if I don't pay for my share the first few times, I will offer to pay for dinner on like the third or fourth date.

+one zillion.

it's really that simple. if you can't afford to buy two cups of coffee, or two drinks, you really have other problems to take care of.

and if you are too stingy to buy a cup of coffee for someone else, you have no business talking to women, cos you REALLY have other problems to take care of.


and remember the other sage advice. you are the one doing the asking, so if you don't want to spend a ton of money, don't do expensive shit. no one is forcing you to take her to dinner.

if she INSISTS on going to dinner, well, that's just fucked, and she's a princess you don't want to deal with.

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Sean Messenger
http://LVo3.com

"War is not the answer. Love is."

[quote="SeanMessenger"

NOTHING closes up the pussy faster than a man who won't pay for a date he set up. seriously. you can try whatever you want, but you're only gonna make getting to sexy time way harder.[/quote]

Once again, someone's talking sense.

These PUA gurus like you to believe that not only can you get laid fast, but you can have her pick up the tab. I've never seen it work that way in real life.

If you're cheap, pick an inexpensive hole in the wall.

You have to make sure that 1) you say this in a C/F way and 2) make sure you dont come off as being too serious. That line is golden if its used appropriately though.

However, I would avoid going out to dinner, its too generic. Try to figure out some of her interests. If you ask her what see likes/wants to do and she still replies with "lets go out to eat", move on, because that is one boring person.

Exactly. You have to make sure this person is comfortable with/around you before you start asking her to foot the bill. Something this small can ruin your chances if she takes it the wrong way.

I would feel like such a small little loser if a girl even offered to pay for anything. I would probably make a scene yelling and screaming at her. Feminism has officially killed America.

First we have "gurus" who wear makeup and dress in furry top hats. Now you expect her to wear the pants. What is next? Will you be staying home and changing diapers one of these days while she is out working?

Dude . . . chill out a bit. I agree with your sentiments and I know you're probably exaggerating a bit to make a point but there's no reason to allow "feminism" to turn you into a screaming asshole.

Overall, I just think it's unfortunate how economy intensive even a simple date has become. What's up with those, "I'm not a free meal" type of lines guys? Imagine if a girl said this to you? . . . Why not just go visit a hooker instead?

I wish people would just start feeling and acting with their hearts a little more. I'm sitting at a friend's cafe right now trying to get some work done. As soon as I showed, she started frothing up a latte. Done with that and she put on a pot of tea. Simple acts but I can feel her inject energy into this and I just feel like putting energy into it as well.

Because a hooker usually cost more than $20 spent at a fast food joint. But seriously the economy does have an effect on both parties as it does effect their mind set.

Reviving dead threads = sad forum moderators.
I find it ironic that you're saying that PUA gurus say one thing when you just quoted one of our "gurus" who's saying exactly the opposite lol

It's not that hard to make her pay for her own shit and get laid, especially if the girl has egalitarian views. It wouldn't be too hard to even make her pay for EVERYTHING and still get laid, but that's just a douche move to pull.

I usually volunteer to pick up most of the date costs, but I do it with a disclaimer so I don't end up looking like one of those supplicating AFCs who try to buy their way into her vagina. I tell them, "The thing I hate about paying for girls is that sometimes it makes them feel like they owe me something. I'm going to pay for ___, but don't feel like you owe me anything."

Yeah, it actually is harder to get the girl to pay and get laid.

I was obsessed with getting girls to buy me shit for like the first 12 months I was in the community. Cause I wasn't going to supplicate, damn it! I also wasn't getting laid a lot back then.

Even now I'll only let girls pay if they bring it up and offer. You lose major social skills points for bringing up the awkward subject of money too early. You can get around this with humor, but the girl will be annoyed and will make it harder to get her in bed as she'll feel like she's working too hard.

Done the field work. Paying works WAY better. And as Shawn said don't go places you can't afford.

S

Thank GOD an accomplished MPUA finally said that.

cheapness is EXTREMELY anti-seductive. and even if she doesn't think so, her friends will, or her mom, which means soon she will also.

Granted it's not the 1950's, women still want to be taken care of, and if expect her to pay for your meals, what else will you expect her to.

To be a good PUA, you have to think with a girls mind as well as yours.

Best advice on this so far. I can only add that if she's into you more than you're into her then maybe you should just move on. I mean it sounds like you have no respect for her, so why bother?

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Artax
Devil's Advocate

"You're only as young as the women you feel."
"I am the Master of my unspoken words, and the Slave to those words that should have remained unsaid."

I would say something like:

"Your getting expensive! The next time we are going eat at home."

or

"I didn't know you were so selfish, you must have been an only child."

Either that or just be cool with it. If you are the one who invited her out then, it proably assumed by her that you are paying. Don't invite her to anything expensive.

I usually never have problems with girls not "wanting" to pay.

1. i dont do dinner-dates before we had sex. this only leaves drinks, coffees etc. and sport-like activities.
2. I don't mind paying a coffee or a beer first if i'm in C and confident i can close. I usually say something like: "Don't worry, I got this one. you can get the next round" and hereby i implant that they wanted to pay their share and I just happened to be willing to get the first round. I hence just assume that they'll get the next round. DO NOT DO THIS UNLESS YOU'RE IN LATE OR PAST A3!!
3. I agree with some of the points made above. NEVER appear cheap but I guess the fact that i dont do bigger, expensive date-style things before a full monty keeps me out of that kinda trouble.
I like climbing, ice-skating in the winter etc. on day2s (or very rarely on early bounces from coffee-places etc.) I just assume they'll pay for their entrance themselves. or i include a lil deal, "i'll pay for this, you can get the coffee later". This creates a plan for later (extend the time spent together to maximize comfort) and doesn't appear cheap if you bring it in the right way.

Hope this helped.

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Alpha - X

Don't hate the player - Hate the game!