| I know what I'm doing is ethically wrong but I know I love the girl just as much as the other guy and it's just my side of the story. so here it is..
so I met this girl about 2 months ago, she just transfered to my university, and we met each other through friends. At first I really didn't think much of her, as I knew she is in a LDR and I'm really not the type of stealing a girl from other dude kind of guy (I'm single btw). However as I start to get to know her, I found out that we really kick it as we share common views on a lot of things, whether it be shallow or deep.
So I started meeting her more and more, however I still didn't give much thought as I've never been a third person and don't really want to become one either. But I know somewhere in me is starting to convince myself that a LDR won't work and I have every reason to start pursuing her. One day she busted me out with a simple gentlemen act (putting a coat on her when it's cold - funny that she told me no guy has ever done that to her even her bf) and it's when things start to get complicated.
She told me that night she can't be with me because she has a boyfriend so we can only be friends. Funny thing is I hadn't even said a thing about being with her yet though I do have the intention. So I was like ok I just like you but I can be your friend and I really meant it. Then one day when we were watching a movie at my place she said I'm playing game on her - that I'm waiting for her to cross the line. I was quite stumbled but I thought I might as well be honest that I do want her to cross the line. So we crossed the line.. and it's where both the fun and pain starts.
Everyday she would visit me and we'd talk and make out and stuff.(We only had sex once and didn't finish it as she starts to feel really guilty for her bf.) But she always enphasized that she still love her boyfriend and she's just using me. She tried to keep what's between us as low-keyed as possible. I was okay with that as I'm kind of just having fun either. But I know the feeling that I'm just escaping from the fact that she has a boyfriend grew stronger everyday. Once in a while, we'd go through a cycle where she'd start tripping out, saying we can't do this anymore, be "friend" for a couple days and then start all over again. I broke emotionally couple times and showing that I want her, I know it's a wrong move but she did come back even after that.
She's relatively inexperienced in relationships and have only dated 3 guys thus far(which 2 of them cheated on her), and I think it's true becuase she really wasn't that great of a looker back then(i think she's good looking now, although not amazingly hot but there's def gonna be ppl going after her). Base on that fact, I doubt she's really just playing me. I mean what's the point of using me when it was only a day before seeing her bf over christmas break? she even burrowed a shirt of mine to keep for the break.
However, as I think I'm terribly in love with this girl now I grew insecure about my feelings. Right now we are both on vacation at same place, she lives about an hour away from me and I don't have a car at home so I can't really visit her. It's been a week now and she hasn't called me, and I can't help but think that she's probably being with her bf. so here's my questions.. If I really want to be with this girl:
Should I call her? I'm kind of doing a freeze out but I don't know if it's working.
Should I have said no when she asked to cross the line? If she asked again when we are back from vacation, should I say no this time?
and just what should I do in the long run?
btw, she has been with this guy for 1.5 years, been LDR for .5 years
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CHAT
