There's this girl who I met at a party. Little DHV's on my part but I kept a fun vibe and it went pretty well. No K close but number closed. She seemed interested in me though and asked me to go to one of her party's about a week later (which was about 2 days ago). She texted me so I took it as a semi IOI. IOI - #1/2. So i went and she was there and was happy to see me and everything. IOI - # 1 1/2. So i kept things casual for a while and talked to other girls and guys, made sure everyone knew me. We have this little competition going on about flip cup and whos better so we played a couple games with some other people and would playfully gloat about it afterwards to the other. The game kinda dissipated and me and her got to talking. I had this necklace on and she complimented me on it, so i took it off and put in on her and her face lit up. IOI - #2 1/2. Eventually we got to dancing and we were holding hands as we danced with fingers interlocked, you know the way people in a relationship would. IOI - #4 (This counted as 1 1/2 in my head). So i thought fuck it, and went in for the kiss and she definitely pulled her head away and uttered "Oh.".... Hm. Ok.

Recovery phase: So i just shook it off and we kept dancing and we both brushed it off like it didn't happen. Didn't wanna act all butt hurt. She kept giving me IOI's even after. I eventually went to talk to another friend i had there and she came over to me and asked if i wanted to split a cigarette with her. Why not. So i went outside and talked to her 1 on 1 for a bit before this moron who i didn't know at all came from inside the house to ask me if I wanted a beer.... What? no. "How about some coffee?" That's ok dude. I'm good. "Well what do you want then?" I don't know how about some water (get the fuck outta here dude). "Ok i'll brb" Guy finally leaves and I turn around and see her talking to some other guy. Fuck. "i'll leave you two to talk" and I went inside. It was late (like 4 in the morning) so I just ended up leaving. She says at least three times before I go "We should hang out before winter break or even during or something!"

Later that night at like 5 (I was already asleep) she texts me "Hey I had a fun time with you tonight hope you got home safely." IOI again?

GOD! Stop fucking with my head. What the hell is going on here. Someone help me

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Sex is a lot like pizza, when it's good it's REALLY good. And when it's bad... it's still pretty good.

In my opinion there are a couple things this girl is trying to do. Ultimately though, I think she is subconsciously trying to use you to increase her self-esteem. This girl sounds like she knows that you like her and it makes her feel good about herself when you give her your full attention. This girl probably feeds off attention. However, this girl might be very prude and might only kiss boyfriends or boys she has known longer than she has known you for. Either way I think you should cut down your availability (sorry I can't, I am too busy), DHV, "grab the bull buy the horns" - control the situation (use a k-close technique next time), and tease (necklace thing - don't just give things to her... make her work for it). It sounds like she's interested, but you have to be the one to persuade her by being smooth. You have to shift her arousal level and make her question, "Does this guy still want me?" Remember play hard to get. So say things that make you seem uninterested, but then say something that shows slight interest (hot/cold). Keep her guessing. Remember in general, people like what they can't have. Good luck.

Next time you hangout, and she is giving you IOI's, try to flirt a little, sexual jokes make her think about you sexually. Once you have 3 IOI's on your second time hanging out, use k close technique, and if she resists, give her a freeze out, or tell her one of her friends is cute.

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http://myspace.com/kodierer

x2. Except for the part about the prude... we all know girls who smoke are sluts....


She already knows you like her and she's using it to her advantage to see how far she can get you to chase her, aka, playing you. Who's the PUA?? You or her? Any flirting you do with her at this point should be for the fun, having a good time effect but not the full court press of trying to hump on her or even go for the kiss. If I went for the k-close and she pulled away, there's no way I'm going to press her again for another shot, she hasn't earned it. Be the one in charge, the PUA and play it cool and let her come after you with more than just a couple of small IOI's. Another thing I would not do is tell her that her friend is cute. A verbal IOD when she already knows you like her would appear more desperate like you're trying to make her jealous because you want her to come after you. She'll still know in her head that you're looking to get with her. Use body language instead. If you're together at another party or something tell her that you're going to get something to drink and go drop in another set and talk to anyone other than her before returning to her. Bonus if it's other girls, more subtle IOD and a hint that you moved on and she has to earn your affection back if she wants it. She tries to hold hands with you, give it to the count of three and then release and reach for something, anything that you may have interest in, your drink, tv remote, a magazine for a new topic to talk about, or even to brush lint off your pants but don't hold onto it like you're in 6th grade. Take control of the kino. Don't act hurt, mad or sad that she didn't kiss you back, act like you're thrilled you didn't make that mistake, blow it off and move on, be funny, with subtle flirting, DHV and get her to validate why you should want to get with her, but you're wasting your time chasing a tease. You do it right and she comes to you or she'll walk away cause she only wanted you chasing her anyways.

i have had a few girls like this, two words, "high maintenance" they love knowing that you are into them, and the fact you stopped paying her attention is the reason she was messaging you, as soon as you message her, and start the ball rolling back and fro a few times, and once she has had her attention fix, she will go cold again..if she wanted to kiss, she prob would of.. in my exprnce girls like this are nothing but trouble, when you do get a k-close, dont get to excited as 9 times out of ten when you go to have sex it will be 100 times more diff, and the excuses will be 10000 times as stupid.. from my experience i wouldnt bother with it, ignore her, neg her.... way to much drama for a k/close.. but if ya wana run some angles and try some things out, do it... you will see what i mean later though, good luck

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Back, starting over as of 2012.

Yo HatTrick, can I ask some advice on a chick I K closed, but can't her to call me back. I left the senario in Newbie Q's.
Or if you get a chance you could email me on chad99utley@hotmail.com

thanks champ

Yupp... she is DEFINITELY fucking with you... shes waiting for you to fuck up and when you do shes gonna stop giving you IOIs... of course she likes you but shes trying to make you work for her... keep on doing what you're doing. Oh and when she said she had a really good time maybe a little C&F response wouldn've been bad... Such as " I know you did "

As stated above, she sounds like your typical attention whore. I don't waste my time with these types of girls primarily because by the time I get what I want out of her I could of accomplished the same goal with numerous other girls. Drop her like its hot and move on...

Hahaha, that ones great. She will freeze out herself and be like wtf did I do!

i would say either move on or keep her there but cut way back on the interactions...let her come to you then bounce to another set then come back and definitely let her see you working the room but obviously not in a "is she looking?" kind of way

Cant explain how similar of a situation I have except that its been going on for months... rediculous I know. Everytime I try to stop talking to her we either randomly meet up or she texts me. Its gotten to the point that I feel awkard being around her 1 on 1 when being sober but she still wants to talk/ hang out Idk why.

I know every sign says I should walk away which I attemp without sucess, honestly its like I dont want to "lose" Im looking to hook up with this girl then its like there will be weight off my shoulders, wierd. Any advice here? ...Stupid I know.

O and what is an example/do you mean by freeze out?

I dont mean to bust your shit, but sounds like you barely did enough to even approach a "acceptable" kiss margin.

Did she look up at you in the eyes then at your mouth/lips? And usually when she does this itll look like shes off in la la land as well.

And if you honestly think you did sufficient work to winning her over then she could be ego-boosting. In that case id quit cold turkey and keep every piece of contact with her brief...cause if she dont vibe you why even waste time? You aint getting anything but a big slap in the face? Peace out and see if that dont change her attitude about how you run things...

^ why are guys so afraid to walk on some girl? Let her come to you, it works honestly