first of all, i want to say, i have been reading this forum for some time and your all a bunch of great guys out here.

now for the problem..

to make a long story short.. i aproached a girl online, she complied, she suggested we move the conversation to messenger.. she gave me her number without me asking for it.. so, at the beginig she was showing allot of intress.

now, we have talking over the phone for almost four week.. and she lives far away from me (about two hours drive). we set to meet ones when she came to my city (two weeks ago) but it got screwd up because she wasnt feeling well, then she told me she will come to meet me when ever ill ask her two.. again, showing allot of intress..

now, for the past two weeks, she was acting very strange, being very not nice on messenger and not answering or reterning most of my calls..

yesterday, after practicly giving up on her, she calld me and sayd that she will be in my city at night.. again, we set a date, again she didnt feel good and it got screwd up..

now after all that comes the really strange part..

about three hours ago she started talking to me in the messenger, she was the one to begin the conversation but then again she was acting very bad so at one point i said - "are you sure your ok? your being very rude.."

so she said - "well, did it ever happend to you that you were really in to someone you dont know but then something happend and you didnt want him any more" -- ouch!

but i managed to stay cool and say - "yea, sure, but bare in mind, you calld me! i allready gave up on you.. if you dont want anything thats tottaly cool but theres no need to be rude.. we are both adults"

at that point, i guedd she got scared.. she said "i just feel really bad (ill)" and then started going on and on about how she was being very ill lately because she wasnt able to keep her diet.. and then she said - "thank you for listening, ive been a total bitch and you could have said no to me"..

from that point, we just kept on talking for 5 minutes about how she can feel better with her life..

so, what do you thing? is she still in to me? was she testing me? what should i do now?

sorry for the long messege and the you all for your help

Doesn't matter what she does or her reactions. Its about what you want to do. So if your interested just lay the law down and go for it and ask her out. If you don't, well the answer is obvious.

shes-just-not-that-into-you-vt32105.html

She has nothing invested in you which is why she can keep flaking on you. You haven't successfully attracted to her because if she was TRULY attracted then she wouldn't break plans with you twice. A girl saying she is sick is the easiest way out of a date that she doesn't want to go on...because you can't dispute it. Every now and then a girl mught be truly sick, but this excuse about her "diet" is a bad one. She got cold feet because there wasn't enough attraction (which given, is hard to create over the internet).

Either way, you said "I gave up on you" which wasn't the best of moves. If you two are still talking and you still want to meet up with her, find some way for her to invest in you. Plan to go to a concert and get the tickets...that way you spent money getting her ticket and she needs to come to go to the concert and pay you back for her ticket (make it cheap so you don't get screwed over! haha). Or even make more specific plans when you ask her to come visit. When time goes into planning, that is effort and that is investing.

well, first of all, thank you very much for your help..

now, i might have explaind myself wrong here.. when we last spoke on messenger, she wasnt talking about why she baild on me, she talkd about here last hard six months.. she kind of opened up to me and not making excuses.

and one more thing.. they way i see it (and this is onlt a guess..), there are a few possiblites:

a. she managed to get me with not enough effort, so she lost intress..
b. she is insecure with her body and is shy to meet me.

and last but not list - im not taking this hard at all, im looking at this as good practice and training and im not expecting anything out of it and thats why i keep going, even when the signs and odds where against me..

and one last question: why is that? i really thought i did the right thing there.. she said she is not intrested anymore, i showd here that its fine with me and im by no means offended and on the way told here she is imature and rude.. the second i did this, she said - "im just fillinf bad", as if she was scared and tried to back from her statement..

your thoughts?

Your reasons for keeping going are somewhat betrayed by your behaviour. For instance most people wouldnt stand to be messed around so much and you berate her over her bad behaviour and yet enable it by keeping going.

She sure seems messed up in the head. This diet, maybe it's something medical like gluten free. She has troubling sticking to it and it causes illness and mood swings. Unless you're planning on dating in your words "immature, rude" and messed up people, I can't see you're going to be learning much of use here because average people don't behave like this and It entirely possible the mixed signals you're giving is contributing to her wayward behaviour. It's like you've created a feedback loop.

You should get out of this and practice/learn on ones more aligned to your version of what's acceptable.

You told her you gave up on her but your actions say otherwise...you are still talking to her so obviously you haven't given up on her--even if it is just friendly chat. You told her you gave up on her right after she said she wasn't interested in you anymore so you come off sounding defensive:

Her: I'm not interested anymore
You: Well that's ok because I gave up on you anyway

It sounds like a retort just to save your dignity so that you arent the one being "dumped." There is nothing wrong with wanting her, but you are sending her mixed signals and you got defensive which doesn't portray a strong frame.

well, at the time, i thought that because i didnt just said "its ok cause i gave up on you".. i said - "after the last week, i kind of gave up on you, but you calld me (which is true)" it was ok..
i still dont completely understand the mistake but you guys are the exerts here so ill take your word for it..

at this point is seems that this "relationship" is rather hopeless and i dont plan on doing anything to improve my situation.. from this point, unless she shows signs of intress again, ill do nothing.

part of being a pua is being in control of your life (love life and otherwise). don't let her dictate where this relationship is going. you either want to be with her or not. if you want to be with her, then seduce her...if you don't then forget her. don't sit around until she shows interets...you are in control of your life not her.