What to do when she says "I can't." ?



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PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 6:27 pm 
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Ok. Last night I had a small party at my new place and I made out with this girl on the couch for about a minute, then we were rudely interrupted by 6 guys trying to get into my house which i had to kick out(i think they stole my friends shoes lol) .. so about half an hour later after i cleaned up some spills and shit, the girl asked me for my address so she could tell her mom to pick her up(shes 17 btw) and after i got off the phone with her mom I was pulling her in for a quick kiss, and she turned her head and said; " I can't" and my instinct was to say "I know" and then we parted ways for most of the night.

why why why?

On another note though, a girl at a different party said the same words when we were going to have sex, I guess that's last minute resistance.. what would be the best thing to do there?

And on my last note, at my party last night there was this HB 8 (gorgeous bod/ ex kickboxer) and she leaned in for a kiss and i did and then last milisecond like sooooo close from kissing, our noses touched, she pulled away and said "TRICKED YOUU!! hahaha" damnnnn that got me hooked man, she lives pretty close to me (20 min walk but i have a car) so how could i go abouts making her my fuck buddy, i told her she'd be my first friend in my new area and she put her number in my phone.

My friends, I need you advice, Mucho thankus.

Kay Bee Ayy Enn.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 7:30 pm 
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I am still kind of new to the PUA scene but here goes my attempt to give a decent response. With regard to the near miss kiss, it would be my honest opinion that you should have pushed her away when she leaned in. You fell into her game. Take it as an IOI but if you really wanted to play with her you could have said something like, "Hey now, I'm not free. That will definitely cost you." This would have given you the power to control then situation. Depending on her response you could start building kino. From your post I couldn't tell if you had been gaming her for awhile or if she was just near you and because it was your party she was trying to do a bit of flirting with the host. Another note, I understand she hooked you when she faked the kiss but as a PUA you need to control your emotions and if that happens again, punish her for doing it. Roll off for a bit then come back or ignore her for awhile, neg her about not being good enough to kiss anymore.

My two cents!
Iggi


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 13, 2008 8:01 pm 
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good reply man, thanks

yeah when she said Haha tricked you! i was kinda tipsy and all i could think of was some afc crap saying that i was gonna pull back last second too, i wasnt really gaming her much but i have her number and hopefully i can mold this into a fb situation


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 17, 2008 2:13 am 
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I used that Zoo one in the field........



EPIC FAIL for me, she cursed me off, then i used some of my own stuff to sway her back, but it did not work.


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PostPosted: Sat Oct 18, 2008 1:03 pm 
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generally, whenever someone says "I can't" I say "what would happen if you could?" I don't like that c word very much.


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 Post subject: play games
PostPosted: Sun Oct 19, 2008 1:23 am 
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that girl was playing with u to see if you are like every other guy and u showed her by trying to kiss her. I would never kiss a girl for the first time if she leans in because if u dont and say "not so fast" she will look at u like "o no he didnt" and get more interested in you because she wants to brake u/get with u. THE GAME ON. what u need to do now is show her that u r not so easy and that she is going to have to work for u!!


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PostPosted: Sun Oct 19, 2008 1:41 am 
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not sure if i'd agree with these replies. sounds like a little internet armchair game to me.

you said she's 17 right? so chances are she hasn't been approached by that many guys since she hasn't gotten into the club scene yet. it's probably mostly just been afc high school kids. so if she'd leaned in for the kiss and you had pulled away and tried to tease her, you'd probably end up hurting her feelings. when she leans in for the kiss, she's putting herself out there and you turning her down is gonna make her feel bad about herself, no matter how playful you are about it.

if she pulls away and says "i can't" then that's not a fail. she's just not completely comfortable with you...yet. she'll get there. you've got attraction. just build more comfort. i'd recommend a book called how to get people to like you in 90 seconds or less by nicholas boothman. good shit. talks about mirroring and how to identify what kind of person she is (visual, auditory or kinesthetic) so that you can relate to her way better and "speak her language."

if she says "i can't", then THAT'S when you pull away. just say "you're right, we're moving too fast. i feel really comfortable with you now and i wouldn't want that to get messed up." she just needs to know you understand and that you're not gonna freak out if she says no.

and about the girl who "tricked you"...that's hot. haha i love it when girls know how to play the game as well. she wouldn't have done that if she weren't interested. just isolate her (once you've gotten some good comfort going) and tell her how she's such a bad influence on you and that you just can't help yourself. then k-close.

but that's just me.

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Last edited by sexymoto on Sun Oct 19, 2008 2:58 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Sun Oct 19, 2008 2:46 am 
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I can't is LMR you need to say " you're right its too soon" then freeze out.

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 27, 2008 10:08 pm 
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from my personal experience....i tried to get a kiss close. went in and everything an she said i dont kiss on the lips at first. then i explained i wanted a kiss on the cheek...settled for a kiss on the cheek...then said loudly i NEVER said you could kiss me on the lips....what makes you think i want to kiss you on the lips c+f.....the next night..she grabbed me and kissed me ...later we made out....girls are confusing any one decipher that situation ????? so ill be better prepared for next time


Last edited by s14dfw on Tue Oct 28, 2008 12:23 am, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Mon Oct 27, 2008 10:27 pm 
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I think that the clue in that moments is not to look needy. Keep a high-value but playful mentality.


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