1st date done now what?



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 Post subject: 1st date done now what?
PostPosted: Thu Oct 09, 2008 11:08 am 
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Didn't know which area was best to post this question so have posted it twice :?

Went on my fist date last night with a HB9.

I'm new to all this and have just finished reading "The Game" having come out of a 6 year relationship with a bad case of oneitis.

Anyway met HB9 in the lift of our appartment a week ago when I asked within 3 seconds if she had just moved in. We chatted until she got to her floor and then stood chatting for another 2 minutes which ended in her asking for my name and my phone number.

I didn't contact her for 2-3 days and then she contact me by text. A good sign I thought. So we've exchanged a few texts and she asked what I did etc (I didn't tell her I said I was a Chocolate Stiletto designer).

We had our first date last night, and went to a quiet bar where we could sit in big comfortable couches and talk. I Neg and teased her through out this time (about 30 mins) and we had a laugh. Then we moved on to get some food. We learn't more about each other and she showed IOI's, laughing at jokes which prob weren't that funny, touched me when she sometimes laughed.

Anyway she asked how old I was and I laughed saying she'd have to guess, and alsked how old she was. She said she was 20. I made her guess how old I was and she said she though 25 or 26. I'm actually 28 so we laughed, so don't know now if this will be an issue for her.

It didn't seem to be, but I don't know. The converstaions continued quite easily and she said we should go out again etc etc which sounds ggod to me.

Her room mate then dropped by later in the evening (who is a friend of her family and is about 50), she was cool for an older women and I talked to her made her feel at ease and neged the HB while we talked. She even said I could call round any time.

When we decided to go and call it a night, because the restraunt owners said they were closing as it was midnight, we headed back to our apartments which are in the same building and got the lift together.

We kissed each other on each cheek goodnight (because her room mate was there) and said our good bye's. As she left she mouthed sorry (because of her room mate turning up) so I just said don't worry and smiled. Now I wish I'd said she'll have to make it up to me when she takes me out next.

How does it sound like it went from your point of view as I'm concerned that she might have an issue over the age gap (even though I look 25)

Anyway the question is when should I make contact to sort out another date. Should I leave it a week, or should I just wait until she contacts me?

What should the next part of my move be? When we do have the next date as I obviously want to move to making out with her and avoid the friendship zone.

TheBrit


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 09, 2008 12:58 pm 
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Well, she's obviously into you.

Although, I am worried that the interaction wasn't escalated enough on the 1st date. She is obviously comfortable around you. You might've been better off, simply going in for the real thing on the kiss goodnight(kiss on the lips).
Just be careful. I'm not sure if you're already past the point of teasing(as it might set you back if you do) her, but, try to escalate as much as possible the next time you see her(making out, heavy petting in general, etc.).
Don't let yourself get one-itis'd by this woman, though. Don't sit and wait for her to come around. Get out there and keep doing your thing.

Good luck, man.

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PostPosted: Thu Oct 09, 2008 2:02 pm 
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Cool all sounds good, is there a good thread on ways to escalate then just to give me a few examples, and yes I want to avoid the oneitis as well as the LJBF.

Do you have some examples?


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 09, 2008 2:24 pm 
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Well, don't let her think you're focusing all your energy on her.
Demonstrate Higher Value.
The next time you go out with friends, invite her out. Be sure to invite some other good looking women along as well. Don't let her forget why she became attracted to you in the first place: remind her. You're social and desirable to other women. Alpha.

You can't allow her to become too comfortable with you right now(see: friend zone). Women are excited by men who will send them on emotional roller coasters...they're enthralled by men who can make them feel so many deep things.
Tease her then be a bit cold...then be really hot towards her. You'll drive her crazy with curiosity and intrigue(warm/cold, you know that).

I hope things go well for you, man.

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O' lady of all my time..."


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 11:33 am 
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Nice, I'll give it a go.

Should this blow out any issues she may or may not have with the age gap?

Doesn't bother me but when she gave me the shit test and asked how old I was and I then switched it and got her to tell me how old she was 1st.

Then I made her guess how old I was, she guessed 24, 25, 23 until she got to my age of 28. She couldn't believe it and said I looked so young, and said I was the more mature man.

I laughed it off and said we'll have to see about that.

The age gap doen't bother me, I don't know if it bothers her but she did bring it up in conversation when her room mate arrived late on asking her to guess what my age was yet she didn't answer as she was tipsy and talking to me. So I have a feeling that the age gap might bother her. That or she was overcome by my boyish good looks ha ha.

I want to be able to practice my game so that it she doen't see it as an issue. Any ideas

The Brit


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 10, 2008 8:04 pm 
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cleanremarks has some great points there bro!
with regards to the age gap.. i wouldnt worry at all.. and if you begin to give away that youre concerned about it.. it may actually make her question it (even if she wasnt before!)

anyways.. i go on the 'half age plus 7' rule.. which oh.. erm.. ya.. just use your own 'half age plus 6' rule haha :D

anyways.. most women appreciate maturity.. so youre good there! (as i presume u have some at 28 lol) just show your sensible side at times.. but also make sure you show your silly side too (im sure youre already doing this.. but it's just a reminder to keep it up. maturity and immaturity at the right times can be very attractive to women)

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PostPosted: Tue Oct 14, 2008 12:22 pm 
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How to play this one,

So after the first date last Wednesday I text HB9 the next day saying "shhh....you're so talkative today ;)" as I'd not heard from her and she had been saying the night before we should definitely meet up again. But I had no response. Never mind I thought not a big deal I'll just leave her to it.

Anyway bumped into her when I was leaving to go out on Friday night (she was just coming in from work) and she kissed me on both cheeks and said she was sorry for not getting back to me but she'd run out of credit on her mobile phone. (even though she was talking on it when I called her (though I thought that it just means that someone will have called her).

Anyway I said not a problem and head off on my night out.

It got to Sunday and I thought I'd give her a call this time so that I could build a little more comfort and then arrange meeting up again.

I was on my way to play football (soccer) on the Sunday morning so I called her on my way there, we had a brief chat for 5 mins she said she'd been out the night before and was knackered and wished me good luck for the football match. I used an adapted mystery method line of "i'm going to do some shopping later this afternoon, would you like to come along to do some window shopping". She agreed so I said I'd i've her a call when I got back after the match.

After the match I saw she'd text me 15 mins after we'd spoke saying "Thanks so much (my name)...But I'm going to pass on the shops today. Was out last night. So tired. Just guna chill. Good luck. X"

Ah well wasn't the end of the world and I was absolutely knackered after the match so couldn't be bothered to walk around the shops anyway. It was a blazing hot day and to sit in the sun would be a much better idea.

Anyway this is where I don't know if I've blown myself out of the game.

When I got back to my apartment (don't know if you know from my previous thread earlier she lives in the same block), I decided to call her to let her know that it wasn't a problem as I was so tired myself.

We talked for a bit and she went back to saying she was sorry about the other day that she didn't reply and that she really had no credit and that when I'd seen her on the phone it was her brother calling her from back home. (I hadn't asked her about this or even brought it up, but she obviously felt that she needed to qualify herself to me and explain) As a bit more back ground she's only been in London for 2-3 weeks as although she is English she's lived in Portugal since she was 3 years old, so she is probably a bit homesick, so when she calls home her credit doesn't last for long.

Anyway we talked a bit more and decided that seen as it was such a nice day we should go and sit in the sun together. I said I needed to get showered after my match, and she said she needed to get showered and ready also. So I said she should call me when she was ready (cause girls take longer than guys to get ready) and we could meet up.

Anyway the call never came so I text her at about 3pm (as and hour should be long enough for her to get ready) saying that I was ready when ever she was.

I've not heard from her since. So I don't know if I'm dealing with a flake, if something has happened (homesick etc etc), or she is not interested.

Don't know if she's not interested as she's been qualifying herself to me as mentioned above, she's been asking my advice on things to do in the local area etc, and on the 1st date as mentioned in my 1st post above, things seemed to go really well with her asking to meet up again, IOI's etc.

How do I play this one now with regards to this particular girl? Cause I'm thinking I should now wait until she contacts me, or leave things a week and then give her a call say next Monday.


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PostPosted: Tue Oct 14, 2008 7:50 pm 
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Quote:
I said I needed to get showered after my match, and she said she needed to get showered and ready also. So I said she should call me when she was ready (cause girls take longer than guys to get ready) and we could meet up.

Anyway the call never came so I text her at about 3pm (as and hour should be long enough for her to get ready) saying that I was ready when ever she was.
didnt she say she had no credit? :?
also, "ready when you are" kind of text may not have been the best option. you're letting her gain control.. in the same way you were the 'nice guy' and said for her to call you when *she* was ready. it's hard to get out of this nice guy mindset (i still find myself slipping up).. but when it comes to gaming you'll need to be ruthless here and say i'll come knock on your door in half hr (or whatever).
well, that's my 2 cents anyway.

keep us updated on the situation.. and keep your eye out for more HBs.. as it sounds like this is your first lead for a while :D good luck

_________________
I'm just starting to seriously work on my game. I'm certainly no AFC but no pure natural either. Anyone on the same level feel free to message me. It'd be cool to keep in touch with bros through our progression :D share tips n sh*t


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PostPosted: Wed Oct 15, 2008 12:19 pm 
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Yer said she had no credit , but she said she'd call from the apartment phone.

She could have atleast got the lift 4 floors and knoked on the door.

Would you advise I now wait until she contacts me, (to be a challenge, and also cause I can practice more with other new HB) or should I just leave things a week and then give her a call say next Monday?

Yer is my 1st lead as I'm just out of a 6 year relationship and I'm now gunning to make up for lost time :wink:


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 16, 2008 2:13 am 
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i think you are being over interested in her.. she probably knows it, and girls dont like that.. my only advice to you is to forget about her for a while and start meeting some other girls around your area.. this will be a huge dhv if this girl you are talking about sees you bringing some other girl to your appartment maybe that could start a spark on her to be interested on you


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 16, 2008 10:32 pm 
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yea dude. as a rule, always keep an eye out for other HBs. it sounds like you connect with women easily.. so dont get hooked on the first one.. it'll be fun to see what else is out there right?!
so, in that case, id keep it cool with this girl.. dont give up.. but at the same time.. dont try too hard.. if she saw u out having coffee with some other HB then her little jealousy meter would go off the scale.. and I wouldnt be suprised if she called you the next day/night she had free. dont let on to her youre annoyed she didnt get back to you that time.. im sure freezing her out for a week or whatever will do the trick. try and make sure youve a busy schedule too.. so that if she bumps into you in the appartments [you can talk about what youre up to OR been up to] then she'll know not to f*ck up her chances with you again. you are the prize remember! grrr

in the meantime.. ya.. get out there and sample other HBs.. if only for confidence/more experience!!
best of luck n keep us updated :)

_________________
I'm just starting to seriously work on my game. I'm certainly no AFC but no pure natural either. Anyone on the same level feel free to message me. It'd be cool to keep in touch with bros through our progression :D share tips n sh*t


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