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I feel like life is living me, and I'm just not living life right now.
First of all what is life to you. Defining this will help you to define your own beliefs. A big step in gaining confidence is knowing what you believe and why. This can be done away from chicks even, but an important part of having a belief that many people miss is testing it to be as certain as possible that it is valid and true to you. Be open minded look outside of your culture and religion even to see what's most true to you. This will give you spiritual as well as personal confidence.
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Approach anxiety: Anxiety level is @ a 10 when it's even more than one female. I'd say my anxiety level is @ a 7 or so when a female is alone. Keep in mind. These are levels when I'm in normal settings, like work or shopping, ect.
I would suspect this could happen for a number of reasons, but why do you think it's happening and we will take it from there?
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I'm stuck thinking: 1) She has a BF. 2) She doesn't like black guys. 3) She's not attracted to me, ect. All negative thoughts. And completely dreading that dead-air
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You want to talk to her, but make excuses not to. There are many ways of supposedly overcoming approach anxiety. A popular method used by psychologists is the exposure method. The theory is that exposing yourself to a negative stimulus makes that stimulus have less and less of an impact over time. Therefore approach anyways. I bet you already knew that tho.
1) she has girlfriends too that's double the hookups, also this makes it sound like she can be your gf before you even know her. Set yourself a good set of standards on what you would like in a girl and screen them for those standards.
2) then she's racist for one and plus every girl I meet says black guys are funner and dance way better, you guys have that awesome soul to you that if I tried to pull off I'd look like a total fu, yo. Fo shizzle?... see..
3) Assume attraction
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False philosphy: I usually have an eye contact rule. I feel like I have 0% chance if she doesn't even give me eye contact. Therefore, I won't even try. I'm not sure how true this is. I feel like I'm missing out on a lot of opportunities because I'm not getting that eye contact.
I wonder how blind people determine attraction in your philosophy.
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No gameplan: I can't devise a gameplan to save my life. I don't have an arsenal of moves or anything.
So hopefully, by browsing and contributing where I can, I can come up with solutions for these problems. I feel like half the battle is identifying the issue. Now I'm on the look out for solutions
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ill trade you my level 88 chickgrabass move for your level 87 boob flick. Moves?! moves are for pussies. Live for the moment, flow. It's like anything else first you must get a little bit of info on the topic, then you must test the fuck out of that info then the results will be clear and ingrained into your psychi. For most of your issues there are plenty of answers out there, so I won't go over them. I just wanted to touch on the things where I feel that you are just confused on.
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You have balls yes, but how often do you actually use them?
Self help.. that's mental masterbation. Self Destruction.. now we're getting somewhere!
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