Ok so here’s the deal. I’ll try to make it short as possible. I took a big chance and told this girl exactly how I felt about her one night after a party. She said she’d been feeling the same way for a few months. We talk a bit about personal stuff. I go in and we make out for a few seconds. I pulled away first. Then she brings up the fact that I’m leaving for school in a week. I know I kinda picked a stupid time to make my move. Anyways when I move in the second time, she pushes away and says “you’re going to hurt me”. I came up with some drunken answer. Anyways point is before we said goodbye I had to ask her straight up if she was attracted to me. This part of my memory gets a little hazy but I remember she said “no”. I then asked how could she have changed her mind so quickly when she’s liked me for months? She replied something like she was trying to make a nice gesture. That confused me a little. Anyways I asked her the same question again and asked her to be totally real with me. She again said “no, not any more”. I was like ok so I left and I think she may have been crying a bit. Anywho now I’m away at school and she’s back home. She came to town to help her sister move in and we hung out for the day but I made it a point to just be her friend. I’m not sure if an ultimatum is the right thing to do here? Anyways at the end she kissed me on the cheek and left. Should this have made me feel AFC? I am going home in a few weeks and I’m not quite sure how to play this.. There’s a million options. One thing I don’t get is if she WAS attracted to me, wouldn’t she want to be with me regardless of how long? Should I give her an ultimatum and tell her it`s too hard for me to continue being her friend. I haven`t talked to her since she left. Help me out with this one guys!

i think the bug is here if u i read your post again i can see that all the problems started from this point. I think that made u an AFC in this case.

I know. i made it much to easy for her. thats why im currently doing a freeze out. good idea?

i think you ask too more questions about what she feels and the relationship... with this kind of questions, she probably thinks that not really confident. take your distance and let her to come to you.

(sorry for my english)
doont hesitate to ask me questions if u dont understand something

Ok listen. Rule one:You never EVER ask a girl to verbalise what she feels for you. A girls mind constantly changes on this. Never put her on the spot about this. There is nothing to be gained from it.

This situation is still savable. She liked you in the first place and got worried you were leaving. She obviously at the time saw you as more than a fling. You need to stop acting as mates with her and put her in asituation where she is going to be attracted to you. Dont throw yourself at her. Let her see you with other girls if possible, then "catch up with her of a drink".

Make this a night to remember. Do it with some style. Take her to a great restaurant, get pissed. But dont make a move on her, until the end.

Up your social stock by meeting new friends and dating new women.

She'll see this as something she might have missed and follow.

_________________
I Am The Prize In Your Cracker Jack Box

WHA?

HO FUCK!

Talking about personnal things is a great way to build comfort and get separated from the usual guys who just talk on a platonic wavelength about "how cool is this house party, huh?"

You went direct, keep that vibe going no need to go all MM on her, show your not needy, but don't pretend your not interested. She already knows the truth, denying it is pointless.

Being her friend is fine for now. NEEDING to be more too soon, will show desperation. Just be friends, have a good time, she knows your attracted, let her bond again with you and things will click.

Ok so I had a situation like this, only im on the opposite end of it (I'm the girl in this case). I was seeing a guy pretty casually for about a month and I was planning on going back to school in about a week or two. He asked me "what we were" and if we should try to make this work from a distance (it was only about an hour distance). Anyway, I had no clue what to say. I didn't think we were serious enough to be having the conversation and the fact that he wanted confirmation on this made me uncomfortable. Needless to say, we broke up a few days later.

For you and this girl, these were new "found" feelings, but not new feelings. It is unlikely that she would tell you that she had feelings for you for months if it wasnt true (but it is always possible). I think she just realized it wouldnt work out. T thought the guy I was seeing was cute for a month or so before he ever even spoke to me. Then when dated for a bit, but any distance is too much for such a new relationship. New ones need that immediate and physical contact to build the bond. SHe prob didn't want an "absent" boyfriend because that is like all the work with no rewards.