I'm Getting Sucked Into A Relationship



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PostPosted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 7:20 pm 
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G'day boys, heres the news.

I've found myself in a really unique situation with a very cute girl. I'm all down for a relationship and she is as well, but i said we should just see each other for now cause i dont wanna rush things and she agreed. we've been through a lot of shit (she actually picked me over one of her best friends in a fight cause the friend really liked me first or something, so i guess that says a lot about the impact i had on her, seeing i had only met her a couple of times) and due to it, its pretty much cut all the bull shit in our relationship and pretty much made us be straight up with eachother about how we feel and what we want and all that. my biggest concern though is how do i not appear AFC when im dealing with the relationship?

one of my good friends whos also a PUA, says it only takes you so far during the relationship and they can get pissed off if you keep busting their asses, and pulling C&F lines. however, im worried that if i act kinda wussy i might lose the attraction. she confesses a lot about how she feels and all, and i know the attraction is there, and its heavy. she tells me about how she usually plays hard to get, but apparantly im different, and things like that. i love to hear it all, but she says she feels vulnerable when she tells me stuff like this, which is understandable, and she still does it. ive been kinda cautious when it comes to this, cause i dont wanna scare her off and seem like a wuss or whatever, but i have this feeling that my friend is right. i cant keep pulling this material out my ass forever, isnt it more for the opening phases and building attraction and all that? i still do, now, but ive toned itdown a bit, seeing is how everything else is falling into place, such as very intense kino getting initiated everytime we see eachother.

so how do i act around her now? lately its been kinda half and half. im witty, bust her balls a bit here and there, and at the same time almost act as if we are officially dating and telling eachother we like eachother and all that stuff. whats the tone i take on with this situation to make our relationship last by still maintaining attraction? a bit of romance could be in the cards yeah? after david d says it amplifies the attraction if its already there, so it might be fun just to test it out on her. any ideas boy?

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 8:09 pm 
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You cant get sucked in unless you, yourself allow her to take controll then you failed somewhere along the way, now backtrack and try to figure out where you went wrong!

SF

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 9:16 pm 
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Just get in relationship with her. Then go out and get in more relationships. Even if you're just friends, you are in a relationship.
I wish you luck, it sounds like one of life's conundrums that you're going to (unfortunately) have to figure out on your own.
Have fun!

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 9:49 pm 
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oh no, i guess the title is a little misleading. its not a bad thing, i totally dig the idea of the relationship and i feel very much in control of the situation right now. i wanna get into the relationship, i just dont wanna take it too fast. but i suppose you guys are right. there are no real magic answers, or canned lines or routines for situations like these eh?

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 11:28 pm 
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You seem to be thinking too much dude. PU (from my perspective) deals with helping guys meet and attract women. It says nothing about how to keep them - i.e., you can't rely on routines and methods etc. to keep a relationship going. You seem to be at a point where it's all you. Why keep up with the material? Are you worried that the attraction she has for you will suddenly stop if you stop the routines?

I'm hesitant to say "Just be yourself" in this case because 1) It's annoying to hear that and 2) many people when transitioning from AFC to PUA (not sure if you're PUA or still aspiring) are reworking who they are. So "yourself" may be someone in a state of flux (as is the case for me).

The only thing I can recommend is loosen up, stop over-thinking, and just let things progress naturally. If you want to take it slow, and she has already agreed to that, then take it slow. Move through each stage of the relationship when you both feel the time is right.

Just act the way you feel is most natural for you in each circumstance - live it. And don't worry about what routines to use. IMHO those routines are only there to help you get to where you want to be. Where you already are, now.

Cheers,

Q.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 18, 2008 11:45 pm 
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thanks qlass, that was actually very re-assuring for me. i wasnt stressin too bad about it, cause hey, im actually really happy with the way things are going right now. not so much routines i was looking for but i guess just how and how not to act in general to maintain the feeling ive got going in her. and yeah thats what i thought, the routines and lines only get me where i am right now and i gotta take it from there... just as i thought, but may as well check if something else helps. thanks mate

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 19, 2008 12:27 am 
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just play her 'fuck you lucy' and ask her, do you want to leave me like this? Dont hurt me so bad. haha

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Maybe she doesnt feel y'all share any similar interests, or maybe youre just an asshole who cant sweet talk the princess.


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 19, 2008 12:41 am 
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hahahahahaha, nice man, she checked out SPAM on her own after she found out it was my favorite artist.

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 19, 2008 12:46 am 
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I hope she check out the sad clown series. Its all about God Loves Ugly and Sad Clown SPAM for the ladies. Slug has a good look for peacocking actually, just thinking about that...

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Maybe she doesnt feel y'all share any similar interests, or maybe youre just an asshole who cant sweet talk the princess.


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 19, 2008 12:54 am 
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I agree, you're thinking about it way too much. I'm a pretty similar situation except we made it a relationship :D

Remember there is nothing wrong telling her how you feel or being in a relationship. All this pickup shit is mostly designed for-in-the-field-getting-one-night-stand or fuck buddy kinda business. Ya hear?

If she does something nice for you, reward her. If she tells you how she feels, reward her and tell her back. Keep things interesting with nice little romantic things that aren't heavy on the pocket or basically free.
Show her a good time in a creative way. Keep things fresh for her. Attraction = tension so keep that alive. Use a lot of push/pull in the beginning and get her to heavily emotional invest in you. Provide good sex or foreplay. Kiss well. Take the lead.

You know what to do.

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 19, 2008 2:31 am 
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As it was said before, the game and the techniques really are just there to let you find, attract and talk to girls. Once you have found one that you like, you can pretty much throw that shit away. She obviously really likes you, so that attraction is now ingrained into her emotional circuitry. It will take alot of time and emotions for that emotional circuitry to rewire itself.

I would say that if I were in your situation, I would ease off on the 'material' or you will end up repeating yourself and she will see it. Now is when you show her what you are made of and who you are. She'll take it, because she's already got that emotional investment in you.

But still be playful and stuff, she still want's an exciting relationship.

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PostPosted: Tue Aug 19, 2008 2:38 am 
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Quote:
I hope she check out the sad clown series. Its all about God Loves Ugly and Sad Clown SPAM for the ladies. Slug has a good look for peacocking actually, just thinking about that...
yeah hes got a rather unique style. did you catch one of his shows when he went on tour? hes a dope guy, but man if i didnt know any better id think he was some drug dealer or something. i still love the guy to death though.

but that got a little off topic.

ill go through with just having fun and opening up a bit more now. shes acting a little strange over MSN right now though, almost as if shes trying to game me right back, or playing hard to get, despite the fact we cuddled outside all last night on a trampoline at a little get together. oh well, no worries, ill be seeing her tonight at a party and just lay the mack down again tonight and hopefully everything plays out fine

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PostPosted: Wed Aug 20, 2008 2:46 pm 
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Your right there is no material that can guide you threw this but I am sure most guys have been in a relationship like yours this has nothing to do with PU this is life experience, so experince it right?


SF

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http://www.streetsmartdating.com/X12


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