I Don't Understand What I Did Wrong?



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PostPosted: Sun Aug 10, 2008 8:21 pm 
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So we went to a bar last night and I opened up a 3 set. There was a cute girl in the group. I negged her a few times, made her laugh and I even interacted with her friends so they didn't feel left out. After about 5 mins in, I introduced my friends to this set. I wanted to form a base.
I then moved on to the next set I wanted to open.
I opened the 2 set, again same scenario;made the cute girl laugh with the opener, negged her. The conversation was cool. She then went to the dancefloor, I didnt follow.
I walked around and opened another 2 set. This girl was really into me. She wasn't hot though but definately worth a Jam! I number closed her.

I later asked the cute girl, from the first 3 set, her number. She declined. I couldn't hear what she said as she gave my phone back but her friends told me she liked my friend. He didn't even spend much time talking to her. My friend is extremely good looking so I guess that was the reason.

This event hosted at the bar was a singles night. I feel that because I was walking around opening sets, talking to alot of girls, I was perceived as a player. Any thoughts?

Also, I feel I didnt build comfort. It was just an opener, a few negs and small talk. How should I have escalated this?

2 out of the 3 sets live in the Midlands. I live in London.

I dunno, I've felt shit the whole day.

I'm aware that I cant attract every girl or maybe I can. Any tips guys?


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 11, 2008 3:42 am 
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Quote:
So we went to a bar last night and I opened up a 3 set. There was a cute girl in the group. I negged her a few times, made her laugh and I even interacted with her friends so they didn't feel left out. After about 5 mins in, I introduced my friends to this set. I wanted to form a base.
I then moved on to the next set I wanted to open.
I opened the 2 set, again same scenario;made the cute girl laugh with the opener, negged her. The conversation was cool. She then went to the dancefloor, I didnt follow.
I walked around and opened another 2 set. This girl was really into me. She wasn't hot though but definately worth a Jam! I number closed her.

I later asked the cute girl, from the first 3 set, her number. She declined. I couldn't hear what she said as she gave my phone back but her friends told me she liked my friend. He didn't even spend much time talking to her. My friend is extremely good looking so I guess that was the reason.

This event hosted at the bar was a singles night. I feel that because I was walking around opening sets, talking to alot of girls, I was perceived as a player. Any thoughts?

Also, I feel I didnt build comfort. It was just an opener, a few negs and small talk. How should I have escalated this?

2 out of the 3 sets live in the Midlands. I live in London.

I dunno, I've felt shit the whole day.

I'm aware that I cant attract every girl or maybe I can. Any tips guys?
1.) You can attract any girl. Bank on it.

2.) She was attracted to your friend? If this was indeed the case, you should check your body language next time. It's very hard for me to analyse your game, because a lot of it is non-verbal.

3.) You don't need to build comfort for a #close.

4.) Being percieved as a player CAN bite you in the ass at times, and sometimes it won't damage your chances at all. But it's not often that girls will label you that. They'll usually label you as "outgoing" unless you're overly flirtacious. Usually, the worst that happens is when you're so flirtacious with a girl that your TOI assumes she's your girlfriend and thinks you're cheating on her. That's happened to me multiple times.

Don't sweat it, brother. Everybody has bad nights, and for you it wasn't even bad, really. You got a number. That's 1 more number than your average Joe would've gotten.

- June


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 11, 2008 3:53 am 
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Are your friends PUA's? If not their presence may have blocked your attempts. There is a difference between a wingman and a friend. A friend can be a wingman, and a wingman can be a friend but if you are new to this, a wingman will help you more than a friend (sorry that sounds like a logical problem there haha). Sometimes your friend won't do anything purposefully to hurt your chances, but unless he is your wingman, I don't think he is really aiding your game. Get him into PUA and work as a team.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 11, 2008 4:20 am 
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--You can attract, try some suttle peacocking, and make yourself look comfident as you walk around, big smille
--if it was a singles night, it would be expected to be mingling with everyone, you wouldnt be seen as a player, if anything you would be of higher social value from interacting with more people
--Try adding DHV stories or routine to escalate atrratcion, and incorporate kino into them. Show them your the shit

Good luck man

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--Brad


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 11, 2008 10:27 am 
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My friends do not know how to pick up. Maybe I could point them to a few books.

I think my body language was spot on. As in I smiled, stood confident wuth feet rooted, didnt fidget, hand by my side. Maybe she was just attracted to my friend.

Should I have brought my friend into the picture so soon??


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 11, 2008 10:55 am 
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It sounds like a shit test... Shes into your friend? No way...

You probably overnegged her. That can cause them to want to get back at you!


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 11, 2008 2:48 pm 
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It was probably too much negging. You negged her to take her bs down and then you left her with ur friend, so basically u just did him a favor.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 11, 2008 4:02 pm 
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Am pretty new here, but sounds like you had no AA and your opener worked very well. Would you mind sharing it? I feel I get pretty high AA because I know I don't have a good / genuine opener. By the time I've thought of one its too late and the moment has passed.

As for escalating maybe lookup some routines e.g the cube you seem to have the first bit nailed. Are you kino'ing enough?


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 11, 2008 4:38 pm 
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Hard to say but maybe you should try opening her friends first and then focus on the target after -are you maybe showing too much interest in her at first even though you negged?


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 11, 2008 7:17 pm 
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Am pretty new here, but sounds like you had no AA and your opener worked very well
Dude, I do have approach anxiety but I thought fcuk it! I'm cool when I've opened. Its just the opener thats a little daunting but even that you can have fun with. Once you open a set and then another, its easy to do it with any set. Just remember, YOU are better than THEM!

I might have negged her too much and paid her more attention. I wasn't really paying much attention to her friends and I really should have.

Thing is, I felt quite shit yesterday. I'm over it today. Its just one of those things. There's plenty of other girls out there.

So how would you have number closed this girl?

What things would you guys have done differently?


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