Hi, i'm finding it difficult today to not kick myself in the teeth for missing another k-close/probably more opportunity. Comfort for like 45 min...got interrupted and she didn't return to where i was seated when she was done, but then again i was up and about also. Anyway...

Can someone PLEASE enlighten me if i'm fucking clueless. It simply feels like a "wait, what the fuck? response if say we are currently talking about say....what she appreciates in her best friend(she got emotional over it so i figured i'd continue that path)....then go out of the blue "would you like to kiss me?"

I can't help but feel so incongruent having a conversation with a girl and then spouting out that line. Please any tips....missing opportunities like this really gets me hating myself. (i saw such IOIs as touching hair...looking at my lips)

thank you.

personally i think asking "would you like to kiss me" is AFC.
go by body language, first start playing with her hair / pushing it away from the side of her face. if she lets you do that, touch the side of her face and down by her chin. and if she lets you do that, pull her in and kiss her. believe me, when you do the first 2 things she knows whats about to happen and will stop you if she doesn't want this kiss.

Comfort for 45min and when she left she didn't came back? Sounds like you didn't build enough attraction.

You also mentioned you saw her looking at your lips. You can either do #1: STOP talking and lean in to kiss her (The more you do it, the more comfortable you will get with this, without having to ask "would you like to kiss me")

or #2: When she was looking at your lips, STOP talking and turn you head a little like you are thinking of something. It seems like a more appropriate moment to ask this. I'm not a fan of this line, I never used it and never will.

Kino escalation. I bet that you often forget to do that, so transitioning to a kiss would certainly feel awkward.

If you initiate kino as early as possible and escalate smoothly, you won't need any sort of line to kiss-close. Check out the DiCarlo Escalation Ladder for more on kino escalation.

thanks for the replies guys!

Nah i definitely know there's attraction....i'm by far the most alpha of the group when it comes to having a strong frame, provoking good group conversations, im the only one who even knows what a neg every once in awhile on her and her friend. You can never know for sure i guess, but im 99% sure she thinks i'm attractive.


And chief....that's the thing..i'm always ON with kino. I did A LOT of it. Shit like...i'd be talking and placing my hand on her arm and leaving it there as i stress a point....or "one sec,(place somewhat high on her thigh and leave it there) as i talk to someone next to me".

Compliance test "hold my beer for a sec"(then proceed to do w/e i was doing with my "needed" free hand.

Seriously, i feel all this knowledge is legit and i even preach it to others in conversation on simply HOW MUCH SENSE it all makes. But yet..even after seeing A LOT of hair stroking/arm stroking/looking at my lips/dilated pupils/not flinching when i leave my hand somewhere on her body/compliance test.....i still felt "maybe it's not the right time JUST yet".

This is my assumption, but when she walked away to help her vomiting friend, she didn't come back probably because i didn't escalate to making out. I can't think of another valid reason, conversation was good, i got her "emotionally invested" when she almost cried mentioned her feelings for her best friend, but then would lighten the mood, etc. Yet the rest of the night she didn't make a approach to me to rekindle the convo.

When she went to leave she wanted to give me a hug but i just looked at her and said "nah i'm fine" ...her: "im gonna cry! not really, but why?!" ....me: "now you just want it too much, freaking me out a little, take care".

Granted i was drunk and very pissed at myself for blowing another opportunity that i choose to just be rude and freeze her out. She texted me saying "Hey. U prob don't care. But i'm rly sensitive about litle things like that. I keep thinking about it. I just wanted to apologize if i made u mad about something. I rly like talking 2 u. Im truly sorry".

I didn't respond....seemed like bait for me to validate myself to her and i didn't feel like it. Also, it wasn't HER that i was upset about, it was MY failed PUA execution.

Sorry to now give u the whole gist of the story....i just got started and felt i had to finish. If anyone can give me any more insight i'd truly appreciate it....thanks!

Crap! I was WRONG! lolz

OK OK Let me take one more stab at this.

I believe you're going for the wrong emotions. You're going for that deep rapport crap when you SHOULD be going for the sexual tension crap.

If I were in your shoes and a girl started talking about sad shit that would make her cry, I would be all like, "WHOA WHOA WHOA hold up. OK, before I tell you what I'm about to tell you, give me a big smile. OK, good. When you're with me, it's all about feeling GOOD, alright?"

I'm getting the feeling that you're going for the deep rapport crap like the AFC who tries to win a girl over by showing her that he's a good listener/therapist. Doesn't work. I do deep rapport after closing time.

Do you use sexual state? Triangular gazing? Talking about normal things with a sexual energy? Talking about sexual things with a normal energy? Physically push/pull? All these things create sexual tension, and sexual tension makes closing feel right.