Hey there.

I'm just getting into this whole NLP thing, so I'm a noob. Anyway - I know the game, and this makes me confuzed. Let me explain:

According to my book (Understanding NLP) rapport can be established by matching and/or mirroring another person. I understand this, though I'm not sure it's correct.

If I mirror another person, I show that I care about that person. Wouldn't this actually break rapport if used in my game? As an alpha-male I don't give a shit if they do this or that with their body, so why should I mirror it? Also, I can't give a girl any signs of me liking her (as mirroring must do..) before A3 according to MM.

I hope you understand my point, and if not, please let me know. I'm really stuck here with no idea on what to believe.

ok here is how it is. according to my book "develope your NLP skills", building relationship section, an expert puts NLP this way.

"success of any person to person communication for any purpose depends on the extent to which rapport is built between the people involved."

so to answer your question it is important that you develope rapport between you and the gurl you are trying to close. additionaly you should or you already do know that rapport is not only about ringing comfort, harmony between the two of you on the concious level but subconcious.

basicaly with out any further adooooooooooo it don't matter if you are an alpha male, if you are communicating with the gurl you shall make sure you mirror her bosdy language, and the way she speaks. but that is not to say you sud mimic her.

hope this answered your question

Have you read about pacing and leading?

The idea is that if you relate to someone by mirroring their body language, matching their energy level, or mimicking their speech patterns and word choice, then you will get them to subconsciously believe you are like them. By doing this you are "pacing" their behavior. You can be very subtle about this and still do it effectively.

By pacing someone successfully, you put them in a state where they are comfortable following your lead. You will notice that if you start to speak more slowly, then they will too. They may start to mirror you, and match your energy level. Ultimately, you can lead them into a sexual state.

In any case, mirroring isn't really about showing you're interested, like you said. Instead, its about convincing them that they are interested in you. Be subtle about it, and you can maintain your alpha image. But remember, if you've made her want you, being alpha is secondary.

Pick up her habits or stuff; e.g. if she uses "like" a lot, you do to...
So it's like; you use the word's she uses the most, but not in a way that, like, makes it seem like you're negging her, but more just picking up whatever habits she has.
If she uses slang, adopt this as well... It's like you're beginning to fit her model of the world better, and she'll just feel like you're like... so getting her, like.. you know... .like you know exactly how she feels.

Even hand-movements, gesticulation, etc.
If she has stuff she uses constantly, you can do this, but make it seem natural, not like you're trying to mimic her and make fun of her.

Or you can put on her energy-level and pace this, following her energy-level and stuff. This will build rapport; and if you're so inclined you can gradually turn over to leading; increasing or decreasing the energy-level, turning the context of the exchange over to more sexual/seductive, or romantic subjects...

She will even pick up on it if you're not even talking about it, but just imagining you and her in the most intimate, arousing situation you can think of. Even if you're talking about the weather, the way you talk, and the way your word's flow over her will be flavored by the thoughts you're having.

Following or pacing can help build rapport;
But you can also lead the whole show, Which I think is far more intriguing for the girl; If you have a strong enough frame, and even make a frame for her. If you from the beginning of have such a strong frame that she finds herself slowly adopting what you do, and say, I think it has a much more sexy effect.
You're the guy they want to be like, you become the diamond, and as you know Diamonds are a girls best friend =P

You can establish the frame for her even;
if you consciously think she is <b>the</b> most sex-crazed kitten she will unconsciously pick up on these signals, and gradually she may begin to actually act out this frame that you have put her in...
It'll also subtly change the way you speak to her, and you'll often find yourself teasing her for constantly thinking dirty thoughts, and stuff like this


this is probably outside the original theme, but You can put it to good use ;P
I just can't seem to keep it short =P

Thanks everyone!
(The Big Bad Wolf gets another thx for a long, and helpful pozt)

You dont want to pay to much attention to the phases in the m3 model. sure i think its the easiest method of pickup - but you dont have to follow it like an instruction manual.you could move a3 to straight after c2 if you wanted to. you dont have to mirror her either. just have a srong enough frame.
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