Unanswered topics | Active topics |
New posts | Your posts
| Author | Message |
| KodakMoment | PostPosted: Sun Jul 27, 2008 6:04 pm | |
| Offline | | New to MPUA Forum | Joined: Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:39 am Posts: 21 | | so i know this girl who i'm really close to and known for a while, but at times i feel as if im expected to keep the conversations alive; because one time she made a joke remark that i always entertain her. but nonetheless she really likes me, and i'm the only person she enjoys talking to the most on the phone, we talk for hours everyday. At times however i feel that i have to keep the conversations alive when it's quiet and have to keep entertaining her; so how can i start changing this routine to get her more involved and get her to somewhat entertain me to make our phone calls fun and entertaining like how i try to make it. bascially im not trying to make a dull person talk, she is not dull at all; but i don't enjoy those quiet moments where i believe i have to say something so our conversation is back on track. what may i do?
|
|
| Top |
|
 |
| Infamous110 | PostPosted: Mon Jul 28, 2008 3:21 am | |
| Offline | | Dedicated Member |  | Joined: Tue Jun 03, 2008 8:09 am Posts: 624 Location: UK | | 1) ask interesting questions that give interesting answers.
or
2) end call
Do you want to be her entertainer puppet or do you want some form of connection/relationship with her? _________________
I'm a winner - I am going to win.
|
|
| Top |
|
 |
| KodakMoment | PostPosted: Mon Jul 28, 2008 4:02 am | |
| Offline | | New to MPUA Forum | Joined: Tue Jun 24, 2008 12:39 am Posts: 21 | | I would most definitely enjoy connection/relationship with her. I like your response, thank you for your input. however may you help me get on the right track? at times we have strong connections and are able to talk about the topic in detail, but may you give me ideas of what i may include to make an interesting question with interesting answers?
|
|
| Top |
|
 |
| Infamous110 | PostPosted: Mon Jul 28, 2008 4:10 am | |
| Offline | | Dedicated Member |  | Joined: Tue Jun 03, 2008 8:09 am Posts: 624 Location: UK | | Well if you can find topics that you guys can talk about in detail, and it's a conversation rather than a lecture because you're both inputting, then all you're really looking to do is find more of those.
So commonalities are a good start. In fact the opposite also applies, so long as you remain playful - disagreeing is a lot of fun! You also can't really disagree in a one way conversation.
If all you do is talk for hours on the phone, you'll find that you spend too much time in the comfort stage and you will struggle to close/seduce. You will get caught in the friends zone.
That being said, ideally you'd like to talk more off the phone, but while on the phone you need to keep that sexual vibe; IE something you probably don't talk to your friends about. This keeps new things coming into your conversations that you can both input to (keeps the boredom away). You're not being vulgar, but simply sharing opinions on this side of things. If you want to enter a relationship with her then finding perhaps finding out that she's an S&M junkie will change that, you see?
Do a search for push-pull and C&F. If these feel like things that you can incorporate congruently into yourself, then they will help keep things fresh and varied. This is something that you want to use sparingly more than anything just to keep the tension there. "I love talking to you... My voice is like music". You know, just teasing stuff. _________________
I'm a winner - I am going to win.
|
|
| Top |
|
 |
| MSmith19 | PostPosted: Mon Jul 28, 2008 4:56 am | |
| Offline | | MPUA Forum Enthusiast | Joined: Mon May 19, 2008 11:17 pm Posts: 77 | | I've always found this rule good:
Keep phonecalls to less than 5 minutes.
If you want to talk, meet her. Then she can't even sit there waiting for you to entertain her when it's silent because it will be awkward. On the phone she has the comfort of being disconnected from you in a sense.
|
|
| Top |
|
 |
|
|
You cannot post new topics in this forum You cannot reply to topics in this forum You cannot edit your posts in this forum You cannot delete your posts in this forum You cannot post attachments in this forum
|