My friend, I'm with a problem here and I hope you can help me. A friend of mine speaks with a girl on internet, my friend is from Portugal and the girl from the same city as me. He putted me to speak with her and she already know (cause he said) he wanna see us together. I added her to my list and spoke a bit, I was a bit rude, trying to don't seems to be too much interested in her. Like when my friend said I could call her to go out with me to have a coffe or cinema and I said "haha so easy like it?" and she said "ohhh, my moral is down there now" like I haven't give any value to her and like I said "I don't know why he wanna see us together"... then she said the same. I was rude and making jokes about her and her things for two days. Today I got her and spoke normal, just as friends and I used no line to try to conquest her. Haven't say she's beautiful or like her also. I stoped to being rude also cause seemed she wasn't liking that and I was doing in the wrong way. We were just speaking about music and movies and so on. She asked me why I was so rude the other day and I said probably was too much testosterone and then I laugh. Then I said "today I'm so nice that I will call you to go out". She said she can't cause she's in the beach and will be back just after vacations. She never let the conversation stop, when I stop to say something she just say something like "I'm bored" or "my computer is fucked up" and I don't know if she's like this with everyone or she's being just with me. The problem is that she sometimes speak about her ex-boyfriend and she regret she's not with him anymore but just prefer to forget him. Like she thinks he's cute and like him and also she thinks he thought the same about her. She said he called many other girls to go out while was with her, then she finished and wanted to get back and he said he'd prefer being at home playing counter strike or go to work out than be with her. And now he's with a fat girl and she (the girl I'm talking about) isn't fat, and she regret it. She also said a friend of her ex wanted to be with her when they finished but she didn't cause could seems as vengeance and she didn't want that. But she would like to be with that other guy cause he's "cute" a bit handsome and so on. My friend from Portugal asked her about me and she told him I was rude but today I'm being nice to her. I asked him to ask more things to her but he didn't want. What can I do in the internet till he come back to my city to make her get crazy for me? I don't wanna lose time and specially her. If I do a good job on internet will be much easy when we meet in person.
I also forgot to say that in the end of conversation she said she'd go out and she was boring also. We were speaking for much time. Then I said to her just wait me send 1 more song to her and she said ok. A bit before the song finish to transfer I said my sunday was saved cause someone called me to go out. She asked if were any good place and I said that a girl, friend of a friend called me to go out and so something (and then I sent an emoticon of a devil). She sent the same, laugh and said ok, bye. I said bye and that's it. Of course that part about go out with a girl was a lie.

Okay, I'm not sure what your question is. However, I will say a few things for you. First of all, if you have the ability to speak to her over the phone then why are you speaking to her online?

Secondly, the reason she doesn't meet you in person is she's not comfortable with you. I understand you've spent a lot of time talking to her. In that time have you gone through and done things that show that you two have similarities? Does she see parts of you in her?

Lastly, are you talking to this girl because you really like her or just because your friend told you to?

_________________
Been around the world twice, Talked to everyone once...

I don't have her phone yet. I'm talking with her just for 3 days, we don't know each other enough to speak with each other by the phone. And as I said I haven't use any line trying to conquest her, we just speak as friends, ocasionally, but she knows my firend wanna see us together, I just pretend I'm not interested in her to don't be a negative point for me. If you read well, you'll see I said she said wouldn't meet me to go out cause she's in the beach and will be back just after vacations. Like in that part I said "today I'm so nice I'll call you to go out"... She said "I'm not at the city now, I'm in the beach and will be back just after vacations"... her parents live there and she's visiting them!

About similarities well, we like the same kind of music, but it's common, she knows many people that do so, cause my friend that introduced her to me like the same. It's like a tribe know? We all that keep in touch are into the same kind of music, so it doesn't count. One thing we match is that we like movies, we were much time speaking about it and so on. I already saw that make the girl see her in me is a good game, it works very well, I just need to do it better with her. With other girl I was using to say "ooh we match so much, we're soo seemed, what will we discover next?". Is it ok or negative for me? Seems with the other worked, but I think she just saw me as friend... anyway with that other I wasn't trying to be with her, was just playing.

And I was in the start speaking with her cause my friend said so, but now I'm really interested girl, she seems to be nice and we like the same things till now, so she's not just 1 more.

And by the way, it's not exactly a question, I just want some tips to how act on web and if I did something wrong to correct me! Thanks brother!

You can start to run game on her sure. The point is you've already been for the past 3 days establishing yourself as a friend. Granted when you do that you don't show interest which helps. However, we haven't been actively DHVing ourselves to her to flip her attraction switches. So to start going after her that's what we need to do.

Start telling the stories that you have that flip her attraction switches. Start working on getting her thinking of you as more than just a friend. It's not to late in the interaction to do this, but it's going to be more difficult now.

I don't really feel like you've done anything wrong up to this point. I mean you weren't interested in her before and so you didn't care to game her. There is nothing that can't be undone.

My main tip for you is this. You can build a little attraction online and you can definately build comfort. However, in order to build the type of attraction you need to start a relationship you are going to have to get her in person.

_________________
Been around the world twice, Talked to everyone once...

I just told her some histories like girls are always calling me and I gone out with another yesterday and so on to make her think I don't need her and girls are always bouncing on me. But I also said when she come back to my city that we can go to watch some movie (ones of the subject she like) and she said "SURE, CALL ME! I DON'T WANNA KNOW, YOU'LL HAVE TO CALL ME". I just think I fucked up everything now. I was speaking with her and then she asked me to turn on the cam... I said "Why do you wanna see me everytime? Did you think I'm handsome and then wanna see me everytime? You'll have to start to pay for it". Then she said to me accept that was to see her on her webcam. I said ok cause I don't have here, I have a board to capture video and msn recognize that as webcam. I accepted and I just said a funny thing... she was with common face, haven't laugh. Then she said she was going and I said "ok, I'm not very well now, I'm with some problems, we talk later" and she gone. So, do you think next time I must tell her about the problems I had and why I wasn't nice to speak and say I'm sorry for that or ask her to turn on the cam again and say something nice, or if she doesn't have it again I just say I didn't say but she was beautiful... what do I must do now?

Okay good job in implanting those DHV spikes. You don't have to tell her about any of the problems. Keep it a mystery.

You can always say that you are sorry if you feel bad about the interaction and mean it. If you don't mean it then it's best not to say anything.

Just keep flipping those attraction switches, keep her comfortable with you, and do your best to get her in person with you when you are able.

_________________
Been around the world twice, Talked to everyone once...

Hey J
Even though I apply the same principles to my online game it just completely sucks compared to the success I have in the real field. I'll share my most recent attempt with what most guys here would call a HB10 (i have a different rating system. Shes a 8.5 on mine). I'd appreciate if you can tell me where I went wrong. At one point she never replied and about a week later I saw her online so I broke the rule and sent a second message and started a second conversation. Also my myspace name is on there so you can check out my profile and see if anything there might have screwed up my chances. It's kind of short but here goes

As always, bottom up

AND THEN NOTHING

Thanks. I always do! I'm leaving now but we should talk some more. Do you have AIM? Let me get your AIM name.

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From:
Date: Jul 27, 2008 11:05 PM



well true that...the clubbing part:(((.....have a good time tonight......
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: ..ILLUMIN..
Date: Jul 27, 2008 9:57 PM


I'm fantastic. I'm getting ready to go meet some friends now myself. I told myself I'd get some work done tonight but I guess I'm going to be bad tonight.

A club is only as fun as you make it. Sounds like you need to hang out with people who are more fun ;o)~


----------------- Original Message -----------------
From:
Date: Jul 27, 2008 10:47 PM


hello there....I am good thank you for asking.....how are you?....I am not a heartbreaker....most of the time...and I am not as cold as it seems.......L:))))I am just simple.....you know.....I went out to a club last night its sucked big time...cocco something on La cinega blvd.....do not veer go there...please;)

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: ..ILLUMIN..
Date: Jul 27, 2008 9:44 PM


So hows the Hungarian Heartbreaker doing this evening?

SHE NEVER RESPONDED TO THIS SO A WEEK LATER I SENT HER THIS WHEN I SAW HER ONlINE

Well, aren't you just the little heartbreaker? Here I am trying to find a way for two lovebirds to work through a problem and you''re just like "screw that crap, break up!" I'm not so sure I could be friends with someone so coldblooded! ;o)

Actually she ended up getting fired by the other boss for failing a drug test. She thought only weed came up in those things, haha. I guess the problem is solved. I told my friend I forbid him from dating girls he works with. I advise you to follow that advice as well.

Landon

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From:
Date: Jul 21, 2008 5:46 PM



hello there...well you should leave her...ist just a headache....I think...if she flirts back it very fucked up....and you know that.....keep your job and your dating line separably it never works.....and all should be fine....be cool and very diplomatic and brake up with her...but be very nice to your boss.....not kiss up....but just fer easy:)...tell that to your friend!!!!:))))))
----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: ILLUMIN
Date: Jul 19, 2008 1:33 PM


Haha, that's an interesting answer. I think though if it came down to it you'd have a hard time choosing. I'd say looks too because intelligence is necessary to success in life and a man will still be very attractive to women if he is confident, funny and interesting.

So since I've got you I could use your opinion on something. I've asked some of my guy friends but I'd like a female perspective. My friend Dave has been dating this girl he works with. They've been dating a while and he really likes her. The problem is she had a previous relationship with their boss and he still flirts with her and she seems to actually play along and flirt back sometimes. This really bothers him for obvious reasons. He can't go to his boss because he really likes his job and doesn't want to jeopardize it. He's said something to the girl but she just says its nothing and he can trust her. He doesn't want to break up because he really likes her plus he already has one ex in the workplace (I told him to stop dating girls he works with). If they break up there could be tension every day at work which is uncomfortable. Plus if it hurts her it could upset the boss as well since they're so close. So what would you do if you were him?

I figured since you say you're more brains than beauty you could maybe help me help my poor friend!

Landon

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From:
Date: Jul 18, 2008 4:41 PM


I would say looks....I guess....cause there is always an option of plastic surgery:)....ok that was not so funny but true.....to gain intelligence...my spelling sucks....I'm from hungary):)....there I said it....so to gain that....you have to born with it....its not the matters of school....so whay are you asking?

----------------- Original Message -----------------
From: ..ILLUMIN..
Date: Jul 17, 2008 12:38 AM


After reading your "guys out there" blog I just had to ask you a question. Are you ready? here it is!

If you had to lose one would you choose to lose your intelligence or your looks and why?

Remember it's important to say why!


Landon

Illumin I'm in the same boat as you. The "reality" game is easy and comes natural to me I guess, but it's online game that's hard. I can think of reasons if I were a girl not go for a guy over the internet.

1. could be a psycho killer
2. wouldn't want to tell friends we met online
3. could be a psycho killer
4. jokes/statements get lost in translation
5. could be a psycho killer

Because body language, joke delivery, etc.., gets lost in the text it's hard to judge sometimes if you have them hooked. The good thing about the internet is that it's easier to move on. I have yet to successfully hook up via internet (I did find an old friend online, but that doesn't count because I got her number quickly and texted her... ironically, she was psycho!).

I think you did everything alright in my book. There are a few things I would have said differently, but I don't know if that would have given you a better chance.

For example:
You said everything fine in here, but I would have made a joke off of her "why are you asking?" Something like: I thought if I asked you I would gain intelligence off of your answer... guess it didn't work though... (lame I know, but something along those lines)
She set you up for this one. You could have easily knocked this down: it sucked big time because I wasn't there.... next time I go out with my friends I'll invite you along and show you what a good time is...

Money in the bank! haha


Overall I don't know where exactly things went wrong. You had an awesome opener by the way... made it personal for her (her blog) and it stood out amongst the other mail messages she receives. You seemed to have some good CF negs in there... reminds me a lot of me... haha.

QB

sorry jsmooth for posting in your thread sometimes

_________________
"I control the playing field." -- QuarterBack

Thanks for the input
The thing that has gotten me off my game with her is that she's foreign. In my experiences with foreign women there are issues with certain techniques such as negging (their bitch shields and egos/value aren't nearly as high so not as much is necessary), sarcasm (they often just don't catch it, especially online) and they tend to feel American men are too forward and/or move too fast so I'm trying to take those into consideration.

As far as the club thing I totally focused on that and saw it as a set up but my immediate thought was to say something like "well had I been there it would have been the most fun night ever!" but I though that's kind of inviting myself into her world which is being a little forward at this point (since she's foreign) and also looking too needy/tag-a-long. You're right though, I should have said if she comes with my crew she'll have more fun. I definitely hinted at that and was going for a more sly approach but I could have totally hit that point harder.


Also I'm glad you liked the opener. I personally could never do the wig. Too risky. My first choice is always to try and take a somewhat serious blog and ask something that implies more of a funny and/or interesting take on it.

Ok guys I need urgent help? or just some openions if you like. here is my situation.

I have learned how to engage the gurls into anwering back to my emails and start chatting with them and every thing. but the problems is I am not so great at exchanging numbers or anything for that matter. here let me give you guys three of my many succes to a pont of close.(bassicaly it is failure but success by the fact that I have gotten thei attention.) I am going to go from best to worse.

senario one.

there is this gurl I met on hi5. its like face book and myspace but not as popular I don't think. I sent her a mail saying

"wow your cute" not the best I know but it worked. this one has had the best success becaause I managed to get her hooked in which I exchanged her msn were we can chat live and everything. but now she got my msn I was stupid enough to propose the truth and dare game online. she agreed but then we accomplished there iis no way we can play daer so we settled for truth. her first question was "do you like me" and because we have to answer in a matter of seconds well you can imagin wat I sed. and sh kept bugging me for answers of why I do like her. to be fair she admited she liked me too and she said it is because we are similar somehow. I stil haven't given her an answer to her question. I kept avoiding it. and the thing is she lives in a different country so I duno why she is soo eager to know. I am just gonna live it on one senario cause this will end up being pointless if I write more. any comments will be apreciated.

[quote="D_Haile03"]Ok guys I need urgent help? or just some openions if you like. here is my situation.

senario 2

the second one is of this another beautiful gurl on a scale of 8.5+. I saw her profile on face book and I wrote her "stop that" in the subject and "we all know that is not your picture so stop fulling us guys..." technique by david deangelo.

copy and paste of actual convo
she replied "excuse me"

me: Oh. I was just curious. Don't worry it looks nice. While I have your attention, I need a female's prespective on something......Say, this guy is dating this girl, and she goes out with her friends, has a few drinks and ends of making out with a random guy at the bar.....Would you consider this cheating?

her: Well dating some one is alot different frm havin a relationship with someone-so i wouldnt call that cheatin as such.....

me: Interesting.....okay, let me ask you this......Take the same scenario, but this time the girl is making out with another girl, and lets say she does this almost every time she goes out.....would you consider that cheating?

her: hmmmm, no, i wouldn't call that cheating! maybe if its something he finds a turn on then maybe he should ask if he could join in???:P

me: ha ha ha ur hlarious. he odes find it a turn on but he finds it wierd aswell. never know she might be a les... I told him to get things straight and ask her wat her problem was. they've bn out 4 six months. oh and your not a les am hopin.

her: nooooo way lol!! it is abit weird for her to go n do that everytime shes out!

SO FAR SO GUD RIGHT? WRONG THIS IS THE REPLY I MANAGED TO FUCK IT UP WITH. IT'S AS FOLLOWS

ME: lol. I mean I understand if she goes out ends up kissing cute guys like me but avarege guys??? and females??? that's a bit wierd. oh and your single aren't you? great! in that case hmmmmm, sud I give u a chance? ...
wat the hell
I have live msn. **********@hotmail.co.uk
lets see if ur as interesting as your good looks.

and then responses stoped. how did I fuck up? any comments will do

Illumin

You did a good job in your conversations with her and how you conveyed yourself in getting interest. You certainly got her responding back to you which is good.

The thing you haven't done is start to establish rapport or flip her attraction switches. You haven't asked her anything to where you really know something about her so that you can ground yourself in her reality.

You need to get it to where she sees parts of herself in your personality. That is what builds rapport. At the same time you need to do things that are going to flip her attraction switches. Leader of Men, Protector of Loved Ones, and Preselection. These hold true for online game just as they do in person. You might tell a story that ties these in and then ask her a questions like what are you passions in life, or something to learn about her, so you can establish and build some rapport.

You two at this point are like casual acquintances. Try and make her a friend but flip her attraction switches. I know you do this in field, now just do it typing.

_________________
Been around the world twice, Talked to everyone once...

Don't worry about it, as long as it helps people that's what is important.

_________________
Been around the world twice, Talked to everyone once...

In scenario one here it sounds like you've done a pretty good job in getting her interest as you mentioned. You had enough rapport built with her that you were able to get her messenger information which is cool because you are escalating her comfort level.

2 things I'm not sure about. #1 why are you sarging girls in a foreign country? #2here do you hope to take this as far as a relationship goes?

Okay so you expressed interest in the girl. No big deal, we did that by basically messenging her in the first place so don't worry about that part. It sounds like you did a good job, but I would ask myself what I want to get out of meeting girls online. Are you doing it for practice or are you doing it to get a date and get 1 on 1 with her eventually.
You did a great job here of opening and then stacking your openers to get her interested. You should have cut this thread a little ways back. After she told you about maybe he should join in I would have ended it. Remember that openers are just designed to get their attention, after you open and have it then it's up to you to build attraction!

You need to start conveying things that attract women. As I mentioned in a previous post you need short DHV stories that demonstrate the qualities of pre-selection, protector of loved ones, leader of men, etc. At the same time you are doing that you are asking her questions to get her to tell you about herself. THings like...

If you could do anything at all, money, and all that other stuff aside what would you do?

Tell me about growing up?

Questions like these usually get a pretty good answer that's not one or two words. That way you kind find things in it to show you are similar to her. So as an EXAMPLE if she says that she had a lot of brothers and sisters growing up you could say something like.

"I had a lot of brothers and sisters growing up too, and there is nothing I wouldn't do for them. I'm sure you are the same way."

With statements like that you are demonstrating protector of loved ones and also grounding yourself in her reality by showing you are just like her, which builds comfort and rapport. So that later after enough attraction/comfort is built you can easily ask her for her IM, and then later her Phone #, and then after more is built then later ask her out on a date.

This process is known as Escalating Comfort, but online we have to do it with building attraction. The reason for this is if we try to do the whole linear process of the Mystery Model she's going to get bored before we complete it. So we open, the basically go right into building attraction but at the same time establishing some rapport too!

Hope this helps brother!

_________________
Been around the world twice, Talked to everyone once...

_________________
Been around the world twice, Talked to everyone once...