Hi,
i need advice on something. i am 18 years old, discovered the PUA scene about a 1 1/2 year ago after a really bad relationship. i just thought i need to change my ways with girls. anyway, im doing pretty fine actually, but there are still lots of misconceptions in my head, deeply rooted in my subconcious. to get to the point:

I have problems with stating my interest (SOI) to the target. I do look good, i do act calm and cool ("alpha" if you will), i have a strong identity (i sing in a band and draw portraits ). i have lots of attributes that are attractive to women, or girls. but i still dont have any success, i havent kissclosed a girl for the last 5 years...and the one kiss that i actually had, i've been drunk at a party.
girls never understand that im interested in them, because i dont show it.

so im asking you: how can i state my interest, what techniques are there? there is this one girl, she is always complaing that she didnt f*ck for a year, and im really attracted to her. I am pretty sure she would like me, for sex and probably more.
but i can hardly show her that im interested...cuz i have this misconception in my head, that messes up my actions. it goes like this "why would she put up with me? if i touch her now, that would be awkward, shes gonna think 'omg god this stupid guy is trying to hit on me'. anyway, i shouldnt trespass her private space like this"
you see, i have lots of insecurity deep inside me, i used to respect girls way to much, i put my ex-girlfriend on a pedestal and all, like some asskisser. i know its wrong to do that, but its like SO rooted inside me...

I really need you ppls advice on how to get this misconception out of my head.
Any suggestions on how to state interest and close?

sorry if this post has become long and hard to read, i just want to have this area fixed badly.

~DLG

Hey there Buddy

How is it going? I'm glad you wrote down your problem here, I'll be glad to help

I'll try to lay down this as accurate as I can, and if I can come up with more later I will

Look, YOU need to identify your problem CORRECTLY, man; attraction is NOT about possessing certain traits that are attractive to women.

I'll say that again

Attraction is NOT about posessing certain traits that women prefer, such as being in a band or drawing portraits, or being a soccer or football player, NO, it's not.

There is more to mention, and I will in a bit, first let me say this

If you want to get good at this game, there is nothing as fundamental as your INNER GAME.

Inner Game includes confidence, prizability, good body languaje, health, and most important BELIEFS,

Some of the Beliefs you should try, by writing them big on a piece of paper and posting them in your room, so you can read them everyday and internalize them are:

"Girls think I'm better looking than what I actually am"
"A woman wants me NO MATTER WHAT, OR WHO SHE IS, ALWAYS"
"I can walk into any room and walk with another man's girlfriend on my arm"
"I don't need others' approval"
"I don't need her to like me, all I need is to create attraction"
"If a woman doesn't get with me, it's her loss"

BELIEFS are very important

Let's get deeper to the results

If a woman rejects me NO BIG DEAL
If a woman comes home with me NO BIG DEAL

This will give you a BIG Advantage once you go out and meet women

Now to your question, about that girl who needs to be fucked

See how you say that you WANT TO show her that you're interested?

Why woudl you do that? If you show her interest you will lose value, you only show interest once you hit a HOOK Point, and for what I see you haven't yet, So Change your beliefs, man. CHANGE THEM!

I'll recommend you a couple of books

Beliefs by Robert Dilts
Double your Dating by David DeAngelo
Real World Seduction by Swinggcat

Read these books man, It will help you a LOT

If you would like more help, contact me

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I forgot to mention one very important thing,

Ima write down 5 Misconceptions about Attraction, and I gotta give credit to Swinggcat, the Man. So again (CREDIT: SWINGGCAT!)

1. Attraction is NOT about posessing certain traits women prefer.
2. Attraction is NOT making her envy you.
3. Attraction is NOT just having rapport with her.
4. Attraction is NOT arousal.
5. Attraction is NOT demostrating Value.

Atrraction is a combination of number 3, 4, 5

1. First, you demostrate value so you radiate a sense of PRIZABILITY
2. You connect with her at a deeper level, this is establishing RAPPORT or comfort
3. And then you move into arousal, or phsycal connection (I still can't spell this)

Let me know if you need any help

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wow bummer....
thanks romeo7. yeah this is something i didnt realize yet. having those traits is not being attractive. but to say something on that:
I never actually relied on me being in a band, or my drawing skills to be attractive. the maximum would be that i got them interested in me, so as to talk about something. its the same as mystery does those magic tricks. its just interesting to women. what i do rely on, are my conversational skills mostly. i have to say that my game is VERY instable. sometimes i would talk to a girl and have her dying of laughter, being cocky funny, sometimes i just cant seem to say anything that lightens up the conversation.

i do work on my inner game, which would be a looooong process, since my past beliefs were, to say the least, fucked up(see dorians post on where we got it all wrong). i just started feeling more confident about myself (and not valueing women more than me) about a half year ago. i am not insecure about my looks, well, maybe a teeny-tiny-little bit. but my inner game is still affected by misbeliefs rooted in my deepest parts of my brain. i guess repeating those beliefs posted by romeo7 will help me erase the old ones.

i still have questions. what is actually a hook point? is it when you got the 3 IOIs? and lets say i am at a hook point, i still wanna know how to state interest/close.

thanks so far,
~DLG

Good question man,

as far as the beliefs are concerned, do it man, Rehearse them, It will help you a lot once you internalize them

Let me explain you...

When you believe in something, your actions reflect on that belief, and your brain actually tells the body to do things that could possibly reflect that belief, to the point that you REALLY start to believe it, and not only you, but the people around you also. For example:

"I believe women ALWAYS want me, no matter where or who"

Tell yourself this, and you will develop the attitude of going throught the world with women all around you, for one you will start acting like all women want you (prizability) and for two women will notice this and will wanna be part of the exciting life you have.

There is a couple of different hook points

- When she or they find you interesting
- When she has decided she wants a fling/relationship/etc
- When she gives you the three IOI's
- When you have engaged her attention

And about this girl, you wanna fuck...

Let me give you a quick strategy:

First, get rid of that idea that you HAVE to show her interest

Get rid of that idea that she MUST like you first, GET IT OUT!

Good, now let's keep going

Now, instead start telling yourself

"GIRLS WANT ME ALWAYS, NO MATTER WHAT!"

Good, here comes the goooood part

Your approach should be very alpha

- Hey, you know what, I've realized that when you complain about not being fucked for a year (pause) what you're actually doing is calling the guys out there to be more alpha, to be REAL man.

Now this will get her really into the topic

(THE REASONING BEHIND THIS:
WHAT YOU'RE REALLY TELLING HER IS THAT YOU "GET" IT AND YOU'RE CALLING HER ON IT, THIS IS SO FKIN SEXY FOR ANY GIRL, TRUST ME, AT THE SAME TIME YOU'RE HINTING THAT MAN IS YOU, THROUGH SIGNAL MESSAGES, SEE WHAT YOU DID? YOU CREATED A POSSIBILITY WITHOUT ASKING FOR IT, YOU DIDN'T SHOW ANY INTEREST, YOU'RE NOT ASKING HER TO LIKE YOU, YOU'RE JUST CREATING A POSSIBILITY)

- If she gives a short opinion, cool. If she goes on and on about it, cut her off, and say

"Ok, ok, cool. I gotta get going to meet somebody (whether you're or not), let's continue this, you have an email? cool, write it down here... as she writes down her email, say... write down your number too" (Hell she may ask you to take her number)

Call her up later that day, or next day (No later than that), arrange a meeting, cool, she goes

Next step

Call her nightime, and make her orgasm during night, If you don't know how to do this, let me know

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