Ok my sticking point is relating to people through life experiences. I had a good think and these are some stories I thought of using. However I need some help with my storytelling, excuses for kino etc etc. Thanks. If you can help me lace any one of these with chick crack it would be greatly appreciated. Thanks

1.Bush man
Out sarging with wing in the city. Walking down street and we see this girl by herself. Use “hey can you take a picture of us” she’s like ummm then suddenly this big fucking gorilla comes out and he’s all like “oi! Nah nah nah what do you guys want?” “hey we just wanted a picture my friends going to Hamilton tomorrow and I wont see him for a while”. My friend put the camera phone in his hand “you want a picture aye?”. I thought he was gonna club us with the phone or something

Was thinking of maybe a “can you believe how rude people in the city ARE, we just wanted to…” build suspense with everything being fine and then SUDDENLY OF OUT OF NOWHERE THIS BIG FUCKING”

2. Bite girl
Was with my wing wing when we stop a girl in the city who shows us a ruthless bite mark on her arm.

This club has a dancefloor has platforms that have poles on them. People on the dancefloor can climb up on the platform and show of their dance moves on the poles.

Well this girl tells us her and her friends wanted a turn showing off on the poles and this other group wouldn’t get off. Said something about her being a “good friend and standing up for her friend and one of the girls sinks her teeth into her. I cant believe that nasty bite didn’t take blood, she says it doesn’t hurt cuz she’s so drunk.

3. Picking up chicks on a bicycle
Wing tells me a story of biking around the city and these two girls basically picked him and his friend up. They sat on the handles bars in skirts, obviously he could look up their panties.

He’s tried opening sets on a bicycle after this, I highly disagree that this is effective but told him he should ask for directions first and then use a set as HB’s will be less WTF? So I ways thinking of “hey guys do you think this will work?” NOT as a opener but as a story but I need help on it.

5. Scuba diving on course
Cant remember much about the fish(was when I was younger). Can remember lady next to me showing me her oxygen gauge which was empty, I try to give her my alternate air source (the second breathing tube a scuba diver should have) dive instructor swims over to her and helps her to the surface.


4. Classmate (back when at school) is sitting at a desk like 24 feet away. He’s asking the class for a pen but no-one is listening. I don’t say anything, but I fumble around desk looking for pen. Throw it at his general direction without looking. He has his fist clenched and resting on desk. Pen lands between two of his fingers in his clenched hand. He looks up at his hand and like wtf? Class cracks up.

Maybe should make it “the other day” instead of years ago when was at school. Throwing pen to friend chatting up girls? Hmmmz. They about to leave and he’s like “dude! Got a pen!?” What about showing values even though we picking up “they wernt really my type, theres a ton of girls like that blah blah blah”

5. Getting chased by bouncers
Ok around new years we go to this club. Where we live theres only like 2 (I really got to move to the city I feel so far away from the action, nice beaches here however) Some prick unscrewed the liquid soap and went round in circles sloshing it over the walls etc, having a ball. Who was this afc

Ok well one of the dudes I’m with goes into that bathroom to have a piss. Sloshing piss all over the floor not on purpose but because he is so drunk which the bouncer see’s. We are walking away and the bouncer comes up behind us, demolishing the dudes mouth. Has metal plates in his mouth. Honestly he’s a pig and he deserves this purely out of karma.

6. Almost cutting off finger when kid
I have a munted finger from when I was a kid. Happened at school. Bell rang and class started walking outside. As were walking out I am brushing the walls with my hand then hand goes across hinges of door, wham! Someone slams door, guees where my finger is? In hinges of door. It’s a heavy old school wooden door too. Run out of class going “I chopped my finger off! I chopped my finger off!” Was like a chilling silence as I rang to sick bay screaming. Asked sick care lady if I was gonna die XD. Wrapped finger in ice pack and cloths and had to wait till my mum got the call and came down before they would let me go to the hospital. “noooo I want to go now”

9. Almost getting killed by a trailer
The school I was at when I was 5 had a creek. I was walking around in it, water came up to heels. 7 kids are pushing a trailer. Im oblivious to this, in my little kid world. Big kid was also in the water he’s like “oi ! get out of the water man! Oi stop pushing the trailer guys”. I look down at my feet, they are stuck. Im like “uhhhhhh” ok so the trailer rolls down slope, wham! Hits me and pushes me underwater. So im underwater in this confusion of water sounds metal and what I think are eels. Some kid drags me out balling my eyes out, or was it a teacher? Probably a teacher? I come out of it with only a few bruises and wet and crying

All my stories involve near death and violence don’t they :S