Man im just depressed about this shit....last night i came to realize that my actual problem has always been me ending up liking the girl first and i get so much into her that i feel the need to b talkin to her almost everytime! and i know its wrong! but i dont know what to do! im fuckin turning 21 in a week!, havnt had a gf, always landing in friend zone....my previous posts i mentioned im tryin to spark something with this chick, but last night i ended up doin the same thing!...i kept on talkin 2 her and probably thew in an unnecessary neg to which she didnt respond..or mayb she was busy or watever! but c thats my prob! i keep thinkin and worrying about it TOO DAM MUCH! i hate this about myself! i really wanna change and i hav decided im willing to do watever and im askin for help....n e help.
I gotta force myself not b on msn cuz whenever im there i feel like sparkin a convo! and yes my game sucks currently i admit...i should even b acting like this....

Ok, first of all you need to grow some balls. If you want to get good at pickup then you must get over it. Anytime i have a problem when it comes to game i tell myself i have got over a lot worse and im sure you have too.

Second of all it sounds like the solution to your problem is to improve your inner game, this can be done by going out and sarging.

Try taking a step back. Quietly ask yourself 'what's really so special about this girl?' chances are is just because she's hot. Over come this by limiting yourself to how much time you spend talking to her and remember to leave the conversation open at the end of the time limit so that she will start to ask herself questions so when you next talk, you don't have to restart a conversation- just pick off where you left her hanging. Key to interest is to just give them enough to taste but not enough to be satisfied. Still getting to grips with negging as I've never done it before so I can't give advice about that but I'm sure someone else will be able to add to my advice. Hope it helps.

_________________
Mr.Kage. What more do you need to really know?

Ok. Calm down firstly. You sound really wound up and that isn't good for you or your technique. Take a few deep breaths... Go get a drink (just one though - getting smashed ain't gonna help either) have a seat and listen....

When you say you are landing in the friend zone - does that mean you are getting the LJBF line or do you actually have a lot of girl friends (who are actually friends?) Do you have regular conversations with them, or is it just the line and you never speak to them again?

Although you are in the friend zone, dosen't necessarilly mean a bad thing. Turn it into a positive - firstly, you are no threat to the girls, meaning you can interact with them socially with no problems. Believe me, you are over the first hurdle if you can just do that!!

Sounds like the relationships you have built with these girls means that if you threw in negatives, it would have a bad effect - they probably look to you, as a friend, for positives rather than a PUA they don't know and therefore won't know what to expect.

It's not a bad thing to like someone. However, you should have an open mind when chatting with them (ie, try not to let on that you like them) but keep the conversation open ended, etc - you may find out that you may not like them after you've talked to them!!

Also, in my opinion, I would go somewhere new - somewhere that no one knows you and so, you can practice to your hearts content.

My and some friends travel to other towns where people don't know us - we can try out things and not worry about getting blown-out!

So, make sure:

1. You take a wingman with you (a good friend for moral support)

2. Look for the signs. Is a girl approachable?

3. You try and adapt new ways of talking to girls - if one approach fails, try a new one.

4. You go somewhere new - a place you are not likely to visit regularly so you can learn how girls react to different approaches.

5. Important - don't give up - the more you try, the better you will be.

6. Don't get fustrated - you get fustrated, you will give out very negative signals. Take a deep breath, chalk it up to experience and try again.

7. You are 21 - Master PUA's are a fair bit older in most cases - they have all started from scratch and failed many, many times - some still fail - not every challenge will succeed. It takes time and effort. Persevere and the fruits of your labour will show eventually.

8. Don't think about what to say - be spontaneous. If you think, you will pause. If you pause, you will have an uncomfortable silence. Very bad. Conversation should flow. That means your opener should break the ice and allow the other person to open up a bit which will allow you to listen and respond in kind.

Hope that helps!

Good luck.

Laters

"G"

9. Probably the most important. Be yourself. Although you vary your style, don't imitate other people. Just because it works for them, dosen't mean it will work for you. Ultimately, if you try to be someone else, you will revert back to yourself and people will see that as false - bad thing!

Since i have started to game, i have met some really great people. I know i could get them in the end, but for now i am happy being friends. My game isn't great, but i am learning. As i learn i will develop my relationships as i want to. Doesn't have to all happen at once, it will take time to get good enough to get all the HB you want or that specific person you have wanted for agesss.

For instance, i want to meet lots more people and develop my relationships as well. So many women, so little time .

_________________
Based In Telford
Looking for PUA/AFC's around Telford/Wolvo area.

I think what has been said is useful. Personally, as a newbie myself, I have to confess that I had a moment where I had the same experience last weekend!

My opinion is that you have to take the positives of the situation- for instance, at least you knew that you have done something wrong. While this sounds obvious, I know AFCs in the past who have committed what I would call a 'deal breaker' and still thought that they had a chance with the girl.

Learn from your mistakes and enhance your positive aspects. While I was pissed at myself for fluffing my chances with the girl, I realised that at least I opened and developed a connection, it's just that I needed to improve my ability to attract (which in fairness is a huge area to develop!!)

I say since your 21 man save your money and take a bootcamp they teach you alot and make sure you get it and approach a lot of sets. I want to take one but to young. Start slow work on your opening for like a few weeks once you feel your good at it then work on building attraction and then number closing. Better yet do some researcher and make a list of all your week points, then put then in order as of which one comes first example the one above. The bootcamps just accelerate your learning curve. I say take a one on one mystery method bootcamp. google it. Best of luck man.

-BigLo[/url]

thanks alot guys for the support it really means alot as by far it is the singular confidence booster i hav...
mrieus by friendzone yea its kinda like ljbf but its like the girls just come to me and ask help/advice for their relationship probs and most of them hav been the ones i hav liked and i guess i would classify that as being in a relationship INDIRECTLY...

when im in a group, i can talk to girls easily.....but when it comes for me to GO and OPEN i still hav the approach anxiety....hence still tryin my best to follow the 3-sec rule....but than i wonder once i do follow it and open up the set...wats next!?? (FROZE)...

You are the prize! I seem to be saying this with every post LOL.

Dawg87! You are unique, there is not a person living or dead who is exactly like you. Remember that, these girls that pass by...never gonna meet another dawg87 apart from YOU.

Your turning 21? Fantastic! use it as a TURNING POINT. When you are much older, you will remember 21 as being the age you stood up and really grabbed this issue by the horns.

I turn 20 in October, been in the game for real a year and a half.

I was a shy kid from birth, parents never talked bout sex or girls, nada, got bullied through school. Didn't know what a condom was at 11, got the piss ripped out of me for that.

Virgin. I've never had a girlfriend.

I finished "high school". that was my TURNING POINT, I said enough was enough. 3 years later...the guys that bullied me, I AMOG them, the girls that laughed at me, they ioi me. I'm a man now, I'm healthier and stronger, tomorrow I have photo shoot trying out for a modelling agency. If you told me years ago I'd be doing that I'd cry with laughter at you. Somewhere along the line I became confident enough to become a latin dancer!

By no means whatsoever have I had a hard time compared to other people, but if I can make a turn, so can anybody! It is a big decision that you are really gonna turn yourself around, needs commitment.

Sit down man, be honest with yourself, on a bit of paper, write down 3 things you want to change, don't overthink about them, but keep them clear in your mind, as goals.

Go to the "meet up and wing section" meet some guys in your area you can rope up with and learn with you'll be on your way!

Make your turning point man.

If a plane changes its flight of path by one degree, it can end up in an entirely different continent by the end of its journey. Make those little steps, no-one can jump over a mountain, only walk.

Student X...

_________________
"Losers always whine about "their best", winners go home and fuck the prom Queen!"

"..Carla was the prom queen."

"Really?"

"Yeah" (Cocks gun)