Im Pumped before I go out, but Deflate when I get to bar/rsl



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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 12:34 pm 
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Ok,

The thing is,
I get pumped before I go out,
I go to the gym a few hours before hand,
I go over a quick few openers, then I spend a few minutes
grooming etc, then I start trying to get into a winning mindset..

But when I get to wherever im going that night, I dont know what it is,
but I get nervous at approaching women etc...
Now, im tall, about 6''5 , 18 , I consider myself fairly good looking, reasoanble appearance, But I know the one thing that is holding me back is my shyness...

Now, I know once I get going Im fine, BUT its so freaking difficult to get into the groove...
Also, I cant really rely on my friend as he is worse then me,
I do sometimes get girls, i.e chatting to em, no number closes yet, but Thats usually if they come up to me, or if their sitting next to me etc...

Its just hard for me to be in the C&F playfull mindset, when Im out , and I cant control the situation...

Sorry if that doesnt make sense,
But I need some help, appreciate all the feedback you guys can give me,
btw, if anyone wants to give me a few pointers, Im in the Sydney area
so would love a bit of a hand from one of the more experienced "gurus"

I just need to be given a nudge I think...

Help!! :(

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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 1:13 pm 
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You don't need a nudge, you need a swift kick in the ass! :) I'm not sure how often you go out sarging, but I'm guessing probably about twice a week on the weekend? The more you go out, the easier it is to get in the groove. When you wait 5 days in between it takes a bit to get in the groove as you said.

Think of a pro-football player. He doesn't just play on gameday, he practices throughout the week to stay in the groove. I'm suggesting to be more relaxed you get in the field more. I open girls when I'm in targets and practice stuff, when I'm at work, getting gas, getting food at the grocery, basically anywhere! Doesn't mean I'm gaming them because I like them, just means I'm practicing staying sharp. :D

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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 8:04 pm 
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Quote:
You don't need a nudge, you need a swift kick in the ass! :) I'm not sure how often you go out sarging, but I'm guessing probably about twice a week on the weekend? The more you go out, the easier it is to get in the groove. When you wait 5 days in between it takes a bit to get in the groove as you said.

Think of a pro-football player. He doesn't just play on gameday, he practices throughout the week to stay in the groove. I'm suggesting to be more relaxed you get in the field more. I open girls when I'm in targets and practice stuff, when I'm at work, getting gas, getting food at the grocery, basically anywhere! Doesn't mean I'm gaming them because I like them, just means I'm practicing staying sharp. :D
Very good points j. I think I have the same problem, when I go long periods without sarging due to my job. If you don't sarge consistently, you will have longer warm up times when you open sets again.

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 12, 2008 8:59 am 
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k thanks for your help guys,

Ill have to keep up the practicing during the week...

Just gotta throw myself in the deep end I suppose and give myself a kick up the arse

cheers

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 13, 2008 6:15 am 
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I use a small trick where I bring my mp3 and listen to songs that get me pumped immediatly wen i spot an hb i approach still listening to the song then i take head phones off then talk I did this the first few times

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 4:41 pm 
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Just don't be creepy and make your approach natural. If you go up with some lame opener or some scripted thing if it goes bad she give you a crepper label in her mind. If you are natural in the approach whether it goes good or not it won't be that bad because she won't mind.


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 24, 2008 7:22 pm 
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you just have to remember and keep in you're head when you're at wherever you're sarging, "Whats the worst that can happen?" she will reject your approach? oh god!!! you have to remember that there are no real consequences for trying. that what i run thru my head over and over again if i need a booster. that there is no real reason not to try because sitting doing nothing isnt fun, and the worst she can do is say no, and if so oh well I move on to the next set.

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PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2008 7:17 pm 
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Listening to your fav tunes like on ur phone or ipod while traveling to the sarging location is always good. Its hard to get pumped up if u go from drinking and listening to some tunes to sitting on a bus or cab for half hour with nothing to do until u get to the club.

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PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2008 7:34 pm 
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Quote:
Very good points j. I think I have the same problem, when I go long periods without sarging due to my job. If you don't sarge consistently, you will have longer warm up times when you open sets again.
Here, here.

Sarging isn't something you do when you feel like. It's supposed to be a fucking lifestyle. Make sure every night is a sarging night. Do this and you will improve.


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 09, 2008 1:51 am 
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Think of a pro-football player. He doesn't just play on gameday, he practices throughout the week to stay in the groove. I'm suggesting to be more relaxed you get in the field more. I open girls when I'm in targets and practice stuff, when I'm at work, getting gas, getting food at the grocery, basically anywhere! Doesn't mean I'm gaming them because I like them, just means I'm practicing staying sharp. :D
Spot on advice j. I'm very new to this, but being in constant 'game mode' has helped me improve immensely in the space of a few weeks. Be it the overweight 40 year old serving me in the supermarket, or the uber hot babe standing beside me at the bar, I'll give them my best regardless. Staying in constant game mode (even if you have to fake the confidence) means that eventually it will become totally natural.

In the meantime, I find a couple of shots of something strong just before heading out usually does the trick. =)


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 09, 2008 8:05 am 
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I support these posts above me.

Ya gotta keep it up. You cant just walk up to the plate 2 or 3 times a week and expect to hit a homerun.. You gotta take several swings before you can knock one outta the park.


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PostPosted: Wed May 07, 2008 5:34 am 
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good advice, same thing use to happen to me, now not so much, maybe its cuz i know im the greatest..


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PostPosted: Mon Jun 09, 2008 9:53 pm 
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Quote:
Ok,

I get pumped before I go out,
I go to the gym a few hours before hand,
I go over a quick few openers, then I spend a few minutes
grooming etc, then I start trying to get into a winning mindset..
All this just say to your mind that this thing with approaching women is something really important and you should not screw it up.
Do you really need "to be into a winning mindset" in order to go out?
Quote:
But when I get to wherever im going that night, I dont know what it is,
but I get nervous at approaching women etc...
Of course you got! You got in the beginning the energy from the environment(pumped up, gym, grooming, getting into winning mindset)
and know you are expecting to approach girls with your own energy..and we a source of confidence.
Quote:
Now, im tall, about 6''5 , 18 , I consider myself fairly good looking, reasoanble appearance, But I know the one thing that is holding me back is my shyness...
Your appearances are not something to rely on when your inner game is not the best. The perfect grooming won't do it as well.
Quote:
Its just hard for me to be in the C&F playfull mindset, when Im out , and I cant control the situation...
Do you really need to control the situation and to be in a C&F mindset?
Let go emotionally of those unnecessary things!

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 25, 2008 6:03 am 
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trying getting excited at home playing good musica and looking at youtube videos of others not doing well in the begining but doing well later on

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PJ


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