This is a LONG story, but totally worth it. Plus, any advice on where I went wrong would be appreciated.
So I picked up this HB8.5 at a party two weekends before. We had gone out a couple of times - great attraction/comfort/rapport. She slept over Friday night - no sex because she was ragging. For real. She let me finger her a little because she "thought she was done." She wasn't.
Anyway, the following week she's kinda flaking. I'm not making a big deal of it because she's super busy at work and shit like that. I call her once and text her once. Find out Friday day that she wanted me and my wing to come down that night to go out with her and her HB9 friend we also met at the party. (My wing got her friend's number and was gaming her) So we decide to go meet up with the HBs for what we thought was going to be a fun night. We were sooooo wrong.
We get a late start and don't end up getting to the girl's place until 10:30 which they're fine with because they wanted to wait for us to show us them at the American Idol final performance show. Somehow they got tickets and were in the audience, so we spent about 45 minutes with them pausing every time there was a wide audience shot to say, "Look! There's the back of our sign!!!" Weird start to the night, but I think "Whatever." It's all good.
We then walk to the bars around 11:45 because AI had taken so much time, but my wing and his date (Sherry) are walking ahead of me and my date (Kristen) and are getting along great. Kristen and I are making small talk and walking arm-in-arm, but I'm getting a little bit of a weird vibe from her. Not exactly sure why, but I guess that she might be a little weirded out by the two of our friends getting along so well.
We get to the bar (they pay our entrance) and my wing and I go to the bar and get the group drinks. There's a live band playing 80's cover songs so the girls get a spot near the front and we join them. Drinks and dancing commence. After the first round is running through our blood streams, the girls want to go for a smoke. I oblige but my wing doesn't smoke, so he takes the opportunity to drain the lizard and get another drink.
Outside is where things start to go terribly wrong. I light the girls cigs as well as my own and then spend the next 5 minutes talking to myself. The girls spend the entire time outside talking to each other and the group of guys sitting next to us. I pulled out all the stops; Cigarette magic, routines, jumping into their convo thread...nothing worked. These girls seemed determined to ignore me. After a few attempts, I decided I was looking try-hard so simply sat back, put my arm around Kristen and chilled.
As I finish, my wing comes out to join us with a fresh drink. I shoot him a look to tell him this is a war zone right now and tell him and the girls I'm going back inside. He decides he's going to try to salvage whatever I fucked up. Not sure exactly what he did, but apparently, it was a bad idea. He finds me inside at our previous spot after I had gotten another drink and we hang out for a minute. We see the girls walk in and go up to the bar - then we don't see them for 45 minutes.
Through the crowd, I can see them standing at the bar getting hit on by guy after guy. After a while, Kristen joins us but leaves Sherry. She stays for about 30 seconds and is acting a little weird then she walks off again. I decide that this is not okay and something is obviously wrong so I walk over to where she joined Sherry talking to this douche-fag at the bar. I ask her if she's sure everything is cool and she barely turns to me to say, "Everything is fine," before shutting me out with her body to talk to they guy again. Cold Shoulder - damn!
I can tell I'm going down in flames but have no idea how to pull out of it, so I don't. I join my wing back up at the stage and when they play their last song,
Purple Rain, I decide it's the perfect time to go to the bathroom.
I walk by the girls, still talking to Mr. Douche-Fag and pat Kristen on the ass as I pass. She smiles, but doesn't say anything. After my business in the boy's room is done, I come out to see my wing talking to Kristen at the bar. I hang back because it looks like they're deep in convo. She leaves to go back to Sherry and Mr. Douche-Fag and I ask my wing what that whole thing was about. He says, “I don’t really know. She’s a little drunk, but I think she said, ‘Do you guys think you can find your way back to your car.’”
We can’t. There’s no way. We would be wondering around the city for hours. We pay our tab and Kristen comes over and suggests we go have a smoke. Outside, my wing is losing it. He’s going on about how rude her friend Sherry is. I try to change the subject a few times to no avail. Sherry comes outside right in front of us, gets the douche’s number and re-joins the group like everything is fine. After an incredibly awkward two minutes of finishing our cigarettes, we leave. Sherry disappears again and we start walking back to her place to get my car.
Kristen runs into some friends she went to college with on the way home and they start up a conversation that is impossible to penetrate, so I end up talking to one of the boyfriends who looks as annoyed as I feel. Up walks Sherry who decides it’s “Picture Time!” Fuck that. I block her out but accidently end up blocking my wing out as well. After about two minutes of being ignored, Sherry tells my wing to start walking with her. Fuck! I’m now left with Kristen and all her college friends I can’t talk to - one of which is an incredibly drunk ass that’s hitting on my date. On top of all this, I’m a terrible wing because there was nothing I could do to save him from the dreaded walk back with Sherry which he now has to do alone.
Fifteen minutes, thirty minutes, an hour goes by of Kristen talking to her friends. Everyone has left except for the ass that is trying to get some. So what do we do? We start walking him home. After Kristen gets his number and we drop him off I want to put a bullet through my skull, but figure my wing will do me the favor for leaving him alone with Sherry for so long. We finally get back to Sherry’s place and try to go inside. The door is locked and all the lights are off.
I call my wing - no answer. Leave a message. Kristen calls Sherry - no answer. In the middle of leaving a message we hear Sherry shout from a back room, “Just a minute!” WHAT THE FUCK?!? She answers the door with major sex hair and I realize I may have to kill them all before driving my car head-first off a bridge. So obviously my wing and Sherry are getting along swimmingly now judging by the “swimmers” that are dripping from her chin so he wants to hang out a little longer. We decide Guitar Hero would be a good way to pass the time.
Sherry ends up passing out after about an hour and Kristen says she wants to have a smoke, but decides to put Sherry to bed before joining me. After waiting outside with my unlit cig for fifteen minutes I go inside to tell them we’re just going to leave. I knock - no answer. I knock a little louder - no answer. I open the door and see them both “passed out” on the bed even though I heard them still talking not 30 seconds before knocking. Whatever. I turn off all the lights in the apartment and lock the door before stepping outside.
I decide to calm down and have a smoke before getting behind the wheel. My wing and I are in the middle of re-capping the night you just read when Kristen opens the front door. She claims she heard the door slam even though we have been outside for several minutes. She says it’s late and that we should STAY. I decide I’ve had enough “fun” for one night and figure I’ll skip the frustration of trying to salvage the night. We leave.
Kristen texts me the next day saying how sorry she is. I don’t respond. She sends me an email on Memorial Day saying again that she is sorry and that she knows that I probably will never speak to her again but that she was glad she met me. I respond with a short email inviting her to call me and explain what the FUCK happened.
I think she probably had some shit happen with her ex since she’s only 2 months out of a 3.5 year relationship. That’s just speculation though since she hasn’t gotten back to me after I emailed her back.
If you’re still reading:
1) Thank you. I know this was a long fucker.
2) Either you are an incredibly dedicated person or you need to get a life. Maybe both.
3) Where do you think I went wrong in the night. What should I have done differently?
4) Where do I go from here?
CHAT
