the day after i, among other things, made out with this HB8 ive been talking to for a couple of weeks we had this conversation over texting.
she brought up the fact that it happened. all of this was said in a kind of joking matter, i went with the cocky/funny approach to dealing with her insecurities. do you guys think this was handled right? i underlined my comments to make it read a little easier
P.S. theres some good cocky funny lines in here too, so if anyone wants some examples feel free...

edit: i was told this situation was handled wrongly, so if you like any of my brilliant lines dont use them in this situation.

her-im sorry for attacking you last night

me-haha you should be. i was frightened

her-no stop i am so embarrassed i attacked you like a bengal

me-i like bengals (i'm from cincinnati, and shes from pittsburg. big football rivals. i dont think she got it though)

her-haha ya i could tell.. apperently im very friendly when wasted

me-very friendly

her-nah ive seen that coming for weeks

me-ha, i bet you did

her-and whats that supposed to mean sir

me- oh HB8, what does anything really "mean"

her-i hate when you say that

me-oh, well i say it a lot

her-your being mean to

me-not true

her-you think im a skank

me-now why would you say that

her-cause i made out with you

me-hey, why am i not the skank in this situation

her-because i layed one on you not you on me

me-yeah, but i was leading you on. i deserved it

her-haha wow great your making it seem like punishment

me-well i did have to use a good amount of chapstick afterwards
so...

her-haha wow your great. your such a sweetheart

me-yea, its sorta what i do

her-this is why your mean

me-no im the nicest guy youve ever met. the kind of guy you could bring home to mamma (a bit of an inside joke. we met when her mom came up to our college for mom's weekend and she brought her to one of our parties. and her mom had a little crush on me )

her-she already approved dbag

me-haha, i know

her-if i wasnt completely embarrased that i acted like a dirty skank last night i would totally tell her i frenched you

me-i think it might cause a little rift

her-huh

me-i wont have you two fighting over me

her-haha no i made out with you i can never see you again

me-dont let your mom control you like that!

her-haha i think im a better kisser than her

me-oh so youve done that with her?

her-no im just making an assumption

me-oh... disapointing

her-stop! your making me feel awful about myself

me-at least you got the looks

her-well apparently it doesnt matter cause making out with me sucks!

me-why would you say that? did your mom tell you that? tell her shes crazy

her-no youve been telling me this all day you dyke

me-did not

her-its been implicit!

me-has not

her-you depress me

me-you make me happy

her-liar

me-we dont need name calling

her-stop toying with my emotions

me-me? what about you!?

her-how am i toying

me-dont act like you dont know

her-im lost here

me-the whole world is lost baby

her-you hate making sense dont you

me-id prefer not to

her-you fuck with my head

me-you fuck with me

her-how?


at this point i stopped texting back. thougt id let her mull it over for a while. make her wonder.... so do you think this was a good way to handle her insecurities?

You have no idea whatsoever how to read in to how a woman thinks. You were processing everything from the perspective of a man trying to apply poorly taught tactics without understanding how a woman's mind works; sounds like the crap DeAngelo teaches.

You did everything so blatantly it was obvious to her that she knew what you were trying to do. This is most obvious with the line, "stop toying with my emotions."

You were trying to be witty and cocky in response to her emotional insecurities; it wasn't a shit test. Stop trying to use "techniques" to handle her insecurities and use your natural human perceptual abilities. At a core level, an alpha male attracts women because he makes them feel secure, loved and protected in a dominant way; she needed reassurance at this point and was not in a mood to laugh.

She feels that she let herself be objectified and all you did what laugh at her about it and make her feel like her feelings were completely irrelevant. She needed to know that you didn't view her as a slut, cared about her and wanted to know that you were going to stick around and appreciate more than her body.

- Chris

wow. now i feel like an asshole...
how should i have gone about it then?

edit: and i dont appreciate that little insult you began with. im asking for improvement and all you did was bash on what i did and didnt offer any real constructive statements. just generalities to ponder. I admitted forthright that i wasnt sure if the way i handled it was done correctly.

Agreeing with The "Chris" Above. She seemed to have very low selfasteem at the moment and I would probebly gone about it by making her feel a bit better but still being a Alpha male.

Tbh i have rewritten this post 4 times due to the AFC inside of me wanting to say "Make her feel loved and tell her you like her and don't think she is a slut" Guess it means I still have a long way to go walk before entering PUA land hehe.

/The other Chris (T)

Apologies. As this is writing you can't read in to my body language or voice. That wasn't intended to be an insult just my interpretation of the situation; sometimes my constructive criticism is written in a manner which may come off as bashing but honestly I didn't really see any good in that report you gave. It was just you bashing her like an AFC chasing after a woman hoping she will turn around and start liking him

I gave you an insight by and large in to what should have been done differently which I guarantee would be constructive and a formidable solution to your situation.

I am direct because people I learned from weren't direct and straightforward enough with me to make me in to the best I can be when I really wished they had been because everything they or made me believe I was doing good with needed help but they chose to spare my feelings.

You'll get better so don't take it personally; in my early days I did things FAR stupider. I could tell you stories where I almost got arrested for sexual harrasment learning game back in the 90s lol.

- Chris

thanks, no worries. this wasnt meant to be a field report or anything though. i just wanted to see if it had been handled correctly and apperantly it wasnt.

also, to put a little context on this i havent been gaming her very overtly, she approached me first and has made every single initial contact. she isnt the type i usually go for but she was hot so i kept flirting with her. she seemed to me like the kind of girl who gives almost every guy she knows positive attention, it was my belief that she didnt put to much stock in me so i didnt put much in her.

can anyone give me some examples of what i should have said, or what i should say now to get her to think i dont think shes a slut.

im very aware of the fact that voicing affection is a huge weak point of mine. its something im looking to improve

I understand a bit better now. This is the type of girl who is a people-pleaser and loves nothing more than to see everyone around her happy. Hot girls tend to be more prone to this personality type because they don't have to face or put up with much rejection and really compassionate ones will try to make everyone around them happy.

I can understand if you feel like not putting much into a girl who isn't putting much in you but you've got to make sure you get good materials whatever they may be. There aren't many methods or materials I wouldn't reccommend [there's quite a few I don't preference but they work] but David DeAngelo is a fucking idiot who talks common sense and teaches a common sense concept he didn't even invent as his own idea without teaching how to properly apply it.

For what you should have said, with that first line, "im sorry for attacking you last night" she was trying to reach out and show look for your support and not take everything as a joke; understand when she is upset. When she does something like that it really doesn't have to be anything specific you say; be yourself and make sure she understands that you forgive her for what she did. She thinks she looked like an easy slut and you just need to reassure her that you still accept her as more than a sex object.

It's not an AFC thing to apologize when you make a mistake when you make one or to show sensitivity toward a woman as long as you are doing it because you really feel that way and are not doing it because you are supplicating or needy.

I don't want to say you should beat a woman but think of the abusive men who abuse their woman then do something romantic to get her to think he's changed and she takes him back.

- Chris

thanks for the advice. yeah you pretty much hit it right on the nail with her. i also should note this wasnt the start of the conversation, we were just fluff talking when she said this.
damn, i feel like i left a lot out of that first post...

PS. How would this text sound
"hey, sorry if i made you feel bad yesterday. I was very high and had been watching the pirates of the Caribbean trilogy all day."
This is actually true...

Fixing this up is probably the kind of thing that is best done in person man. I've had a lot of experience with fixing stupid moves or mistakes throught my years and I can tell you that you want to do it where she connect with you as many levels (body language, voice, ect) as possible to really get her back in to you; you were alpha in those texts so you didn't lose attraction points with her but you need to get her to enjoy being with you again.

- Chris

got it, thanks. but do you think this text be appropriate to initiate a conversation to get her to meet me in person where i could repair whatever damage i did.