Ok, so I just got back from a club and I would like some advice. I'll try and explain this as concise and short as possible.

I meet this girl in the bathroom (shared men/womens sinks), I start talking to this hot girl, somehow we began discussing hand sanitation, etc... turns out she went to the same university as me a few years ago. My friend and I walk with her to her group of friends on the dancefloor.. we're dancing with them, etc.. .and after about 5-10mins we leave their area... (I didnt want them thinking we were clingy and wanted to stay there!)... we passby again 1/2 hour later and I say the odd thing to the girl that I had talked to.

I don't think we had GREAT rapport, but I sense some attraction from her.. so anyway I say the following:

ME: You seem cool, we should continue this..

HER: Ok

ME: (I put my phone towards her trying to get her to take it and input it.. but I've found this hasn't worked well for me.. I have a blackberry and i've found that girls don't always know how to use it to put their number in!)

HER: blahahaha

ME: blahaha

I sort of forget how it totally went, but for some reason I feel that it WAS NOT A STRONG # CLOSE, though I think it may be salvagable. I'm pretty sure its her REAL NUMBER, and she must feel some comfort knowing that we went to the same school in a totally different city,etc. But I would like to see her again.

I figure I MUST come out strong when I call her, instead of talking about flake etc... should I ask for a meeting on the first phone call? I've just had soo many of these in the past and my PHONE NUMBER to MEETING ratio hasn't been the greatest.

Dude, first thing first, I want you to disconnect emotionally from the outcome.

You are the prize. Believe that.

Now make a plan on what you were going to do anyways, lunch, shop at the mall, whatever, just don't go out of your way to impress.

When you call, use an opener.

for example:
If you are going to the mall.

her - hello?
you - real quick I need a womans opinion, I am going to the mall later, i'm looking into changing my style, what mens clothing stores would you suggest?
her - blah blah blah
you - what are you doing at (whatever time you planned on going)
her - either buisy or not

if not
you - good, ill pick you up/meet me at the mall, I need your help, plus theres this cookie place I promise one bite and your hooked on them, I bet they put crack in those things, lol.

if buisy.
you - well I was going to let you help me out, and I was going to show you my favorite snack shop thats to die for, id tell you more about it but I got to go (read her, on if she says are you going to call back, check the tonality of her voice)

If she says yes, great! If she says no, bummer

Just remember, you dont have control over that part, what you do have control over is asking her out to the best of your ability. That is the diffrence between success and failure. You only fail if you do not try.

happy hunting
-Jazzy

Hmm interesting, so wen I call, go straight to the opener (I'll get a good female opinion question) ?

I suppose its worth a shot, because I have a feeling if I just call her and we talk about 'flake' stuff, that she will lose interest very quickly... like I said before, the only reason I feel like this is because I don't think that I built a "great" rapport.

AND, you're totally right about disconnecting myself emotionally from the outcome. I am the prize and I must continually remind myself of this. By having this frame of mind, I believe this should further increase self confidence and ultimately make me more attractable to women.

Yes I would have the conversation kinda mapped out before I would call, and the mindset that you are calling a bratty lillte sister.

Her saying no is not a failure, you not trying is a failure.

Ok so I called her... got voicemail and hung up (I hate leaving messages because it gives them the chance NOT to return the call). So what I've found with the last 2 numbers I've gotten, that I hang up at voicemail, and then the girl calls back later and says something to the effect.. "I got a missed call from this number, who is this?"

This is what happened last nite with this particular girl. It was late and she was going to bed, but we spoke for a quick 4-5 min, towards the latter of the conversation I did the following:

ME: Do you have good taste in mens clothing?

HER: Hmm, yea I do.

ME: Great, well I'm going to downtown Wednesday evening to buy some new shirts for work, I could use your opinion.

HER: Well Wednesday my girlfriends and I are going for dinner, we just finished exams last week so this is my first REAL weeek off..

ME: Oh ok, no problem, well I also plan to be downtown tomorrow (WHICH IS TODAY) but not sure if I'm going to have time to go shopping depending on how my meetings go..

HER: Ok, well I'll be working till 5ish, but work could go a bit later so not sure if you'll catch me when you call, but leave me a message if my phone is off.

ME: Sounds good.


Then we pretty much ended the call on that note. So I think the opinion opener worked, not sure if I did it exactly the way you said it... though it was good, because not sure where it would have gone if I hadn't. I'm guessing she coulda flaked on me, as she probably still can, though I think there is some interest on the fact that she said leave a message if you don't get me because I will be working, hopefully this isn't just a line.

Any thoughts? I actually don't have a work meeting today, but I figure this might work... I hope that if I meet her, I can continue this good run.. any pointers for if/when I see her?

OK, too late for me to show routines and games n such, BUT

ATTITUDE IS EVERYTHING

Act like an older brother with a bratty littl sister with her and have fun, be playful.

If you know the Mystery Method steps A1 A2 A3-C1, etc.?

If you do, you don't really need a routine to know WHERE THE RELATIONSHIP IS AT.

Start A1 again. Opener. (something about her advice again

A2 Cocky Funny ( bratty little sister attitude)

A3 if she gives you 3 IOI's, do not be afraid to let her know you like her too (aka the return IOI). If she flakes, back to A2, if not...

C1 comfortease back a lil on the cocky funny, fluff a little more. If you are at C1 you donr great. Rapport is the name of the game. Trust + Comfort=Rapport

C2 Kiss

etc...

the main focus is getting through A3. You do that and you have a relationship. Hope that helps and I returned quick enough.

Jazzy thanks for the advice... well I do know the Mystery Method. I called her in the evening, got no response, and left NO voicemail. If I'm called on this, then my response is that I'm a busy guy (as I made it seem yesterday) and I don't like leaving messages. She hasn't called me, which means that I could be potentially losing this one, which is what I thought from the beginning.... or she could be like well I know its his number that called and he never left a message so ""oh well"".

Guys I HATE leaving messages because I feel like it leaves the ball in her court ... should I be wrong to think this?? anyway, either way, I'm getting more involved and more active, and though this girl was cute, I really don't give a SHIT anymore whether she calls me or not. I am the prize and the way I look at it.. its her loss. I'm glad to say that I can finally believe this.

I think it could be worth another call, but I don't know. Looking back, I prob should have left a message on the last call, BUT I DIDN'T so no point in dwelling on the past.

Ok so as I mentioned in the last post, I never left a message so she technically doesn't have to call.. I think this is worth one last shot.. though I can't use the opinion on the clothing anymore because it will look dry.

I was thinking of calling on Thurs and if I dont get her live, leave a message, and say that I am heading to this spot (which I am! actually my friend and I are going to a venue to meet 2 other girls that are interested in us) and tell her to pass by if she's free. If she calls back, great, otherwise, that will be my last call to her.

Thoughts?

Girls are the great mystery are they not?, lol

Hey man I am happy to help in any way I can.

It sounds to me like you have a complete plan. I assume if she does show up, with the other girls being there, some pawning will go on.

The hard thing about women, is to get them you have to be uninterested, but you are so totally interested in them, its almost like performing reverse psychology on yourself.

I believe you have a good attitude going into this, if she shows up, great, if she flakes, no matter, other girls there.

Yea I would always leave a message, I do not answer strange #'s and if they dont leave a message, then they do not get called back

Maybe neg her in the message, like, "Gee, I thank you for helping me shop, nerd. Anyways im..."

happy hunting
-Jazzy

Hey thanks.... great idea on the neg in the message .... i think that could prove to be helpful man.. though what else could I call her besides "nerd" . ... i don't like the sound of it... comes off sort of insulting, no??

ALSO, these girls that we're meeting tmrw are pretty hot too... i don't know if i want to be pawning as I will probably want both girls... should I still invite her ??