Today I had once again a good chance to go talk to this chick who has given me IOI's before (at least I think so). She was sitting alone in the university library, reading some magazine.


I know I could probably get her (at least I hope so ). But once again, those same questions started floating in my head.
"What the hell should I say?"
"What if she thinks I'm a weirdo?"
etc


I just couldn't walk to her, so I just went to read instead.

Hey. You're treying to change your life!!

Don't let the errors decrease your confidence. Accept them as a chance for a change!!

Have you ever study any PUA method? Do you have some openers in mind?
That's all you need to start up and lose this kind of confidence.

Think about it:

You're reading a book at the library. You're really interested on the book and don't wanna be bothered. But suddenly a girl walks into you, asks if she cans take just a second from you. Would you say you're too occupied or listen to that girl smiling and asking nicely? That's exactly what a girl would think if you get out of your confort zone and go into hers...

So you don't need to be afraid. Remember: She's not part of your life. You have nothing to lose if the talks doesn't go very succesful. I prefer regret for what I've done, than blame my self for the things I've should done, and didn't.

You gotta move forward. Forget it and try again! At least APPROACH!

Good Luck!

_________________
"The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed." - Carl Jung

There will never be an approach you will regret, but there will always be non-approaches you will regret. Me personally, I'd rather live without the regret. They don't bite. Well, not unless you ask them to.

Better to pass all this bad feelings BEFORE: the easy way is to write down all the 'excuses' you can think of to avoid approaching.
Bring a paper and divided it in two columns. In the left ofe write down all the worst and even fun 'excuses' you could think of to stop you during approaches.
in the right sided column write all the answers you can think of to approach. Then cut the paper, waste the left column in the garbage or better burn it, and then sign put right column on the wall of your room.
Do it.
Now.

Believe me: it works.
Done ?
Do it !

Thanks guys, very good posts all three.




None.

One more thing I forgot to add is that I always think the girl will laugh at me and then tell all her friends about my pathetic attempt. And then they'll all laugh at me...


I know, it probably sounds stupid but I can't get that out of my head.

You're welcome

at least two openers you can immediately memorize and can be always remembered and easily used everywhere are:

1- "hey guys do you know where's the bathroom ?"
then you can add: "but there I'll find a jacuzzi for me and my girlfriend ??? "

2- "hey guys here there's always this kind of music ?" or "hey guys here there's always so many (or so few) people?""
then you can add: "I was invited by some girlfriend but they told us this was a very good place, do you know some other place?"

WHo gives a shit if they laugh at you? Fuck them. Don't let it bother you. You really need to work on your inner game and start reading material.

Those openers sound horrible.

Two HB7's laughed at me when I used a "Who do you think lies more?" opener. I just walked away and ten minutes later scored an HB8's number. So really who gives a flying fuck. Move on to the next set if it doesn't work out, and no matter what stay alpha. You never know maybe they will open you later.

Joker

None openers in mind?

Ok. I'm seeing you're completly NEW at PUA stuff.

So maybe I'll give some advices from the beggining.

First: A PUA needs to have style. Cut your hair, buy some hats (I mean some different ones, that's PEACOCK ). Put some rings in your fingers, and use some jewerly. Woman really pay attention to that, and you can use it to build attraction.
Shiny shoes and perfume might help too. No matter where you going, a PUA is always prepared.

In resume: Clothes + Hair (hats) + Jewerly + shoes = AVATAR. That's the beggining of a new lifestyle.
You don't wanna approach a girl and she has already judge you by your clothes. If you're different and have lots of stuff, she'll try to see what's up .. Got it?

Second: The OPENERS.

Openers are short stories or questions that may open a SET (group of people).
You see a interesting girl. But she's out of your confort zone. I mean, you're standing and expecting she to aproaches you? You gotta leave your confort zone into HERS.
And how to start it? With the OPENER.

At the library you could have some openers in mind. Some openers are like a joker in a deck. You can use it everywhere in any situation. Like this:

If you're a library, you could approach a girl who has some books in hand and say: " Oh, looks like we've got another library right here..."

Or if you were at a club: "Oh, looks like we've got another party here... "

REMEMBER: Always have a SMILE on in your face. Doesn't matter how fake it is, this will help you to get into her confort zone.

Girls use to say to this opening: "Yeah... " But you just caught their attention. You're now able to talk other stuff... Sometimes so, u use 2 or 3 openers until you pick a girl.

"So, you read a lot (SO you like party huh?). Probably you can solve this question me and a friend were arguing right now. Dental Floss , after or before brush? ( or you could ask: "Who betrays more, man or woman?" ... Or maybe: "My friend's have this girlfriend. One day he found her with another girl... Do you guys think this is cheating? ")

There's a LOT of openers. That you could use in any situation.

So the first thing is open a conversation.

Do you understand this part?

If you can get this one, we can start talk about some other stuff...

Don't worry, girls are not your friend, they don't know you. No need to be shy....

_________________
"The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed." - Carl Jung

Thanks choraumm, really nice post.


I think I have style. (could be wrong too )


What should I do after the opener(s)? I'm pretty sure I'd have nothing to say and it would be very awkward situation then. How can I keep the conversation going?


I'm so good at conversations, I usually ran out of things to say even when I'm with my friends. i'm a very silent guy I guess.

Alright. To keep the conversation interesting, first of all you gotta change this idea of "I don't know what to talk". Remember you're a PUA!! You gotta show confidence...

So after opening a set. Let's say you got their attention. Now realize this example:

You're a salesman and trying to sell any product. After got the attetion of a person, what would you say???

You would talk about the characteristcs of product. You're trying to sell it, so you need to impress the customer. You need to be convincing enough to make the customer buy it.

Now turn this example into your field. You're the product! And guess what?
Girls need this product.
You just need to give them enough VALUE of the product.

That's what we call DHV ( Demonstration of High Value ).
After opening you should convince the girl that you're awesome, and you wanna to build this attraction of her to you.

SO you can tell her stories about of your own life. Something funny, but not vomiting all words. Say it pausedly.

Like:

You: "Hm I just got back from a travel... "
She: "Really? Where were you?"
You: "Netherlands... Crazy place there.... they have the biggest anything of the world... bla bla "

Show her that you're a nice guy, tell stories....

Than you can use some NEGS.

A NEG is something you say to keep the girl suprised. It's something you say that she's not expecting, in a way to laugh of her. Not to lower her, but to make fun of her.

You: "Yeah, and out there on Netherlands, they smoke pot just like you..."
She: "But I don't smoke pot.."
You: "Oh really? I thought you did, you're eyes are so red... " *(This is a NEG )

Or if she says:
She: "I really love smoke some weed!! "
You: "Really? So I'll finish this conversation now. You won't even remember my name tomorrow..." ( That's a NEG again . )

This helps you to make her desires you. All the guys would say good things to her, instead you're not saying. That's what girls want, DIFFERENT GUYS.

So, next step DHV, NEGS.

IF you can get this one. I'll move to next step, ok?

See ya!

_________________
"The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed." - Carl Jung

but you are not a girl, nor an Hb... Your comment is horrible: probably you forgot this request come from a member of this community who were having troubles in MEMORIZING some line. Come here and I'll show you how they can work if you work them. Are you that type of boy who likes to judge on others to boost your ego ? Your comment is horrible in any case: nobody told you the delivery is much more important than the content itself?