Right, I am having trouble working out how to deal with this problem.

A while back I gamed a girl and began dating her. We stayed together on and off for a long time. She was young and I never f-closed. (It didn't work out, my game was weaker then - whole range of reasons).

Anyway, we split up for a short while. She has just walked back into my life, wanting to start something up again. We have chatted a few times, and it has been really good. Me and her have a really good bond compared to other girls I have met when gaming, and she is a definite LTR.

She just told me that she lost her virginity between the time we split up and now. I'm not sure quite what to do with this. It does hurt me. We were dating for a while and she always wanted to wait. Now it seems she has hopped into bed with some other guy at the drop of a hat.

Somewhere in the game it says that nothing should be a big deal. And I am thinking I should tell her it does disappoint me but I can deal with it. Then just carry on building our relationship again.

On the other hand, it seems to me that if I am the prize then I have to make her do some chasing here. Before she told me, she said I was going to be disappointed so she was already in the frame where I have the right to be a bit upset.

As I am a bit gutted and she has already shown that she wants a relationship with me should I make her chase a little here, and try and win me back. I figure that will make out bond stronger in the long run.

But, it does make it a big deal if I do that. Shouldn't I just stay cool and be happy that she came back to me?

Any thoughts, very very appreciated.

Taking her anal virginity seems like your only logical option at this point.

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Lo' there do I see My Father.
Lo' there do I see the line of My People, back to the beginning.
Lo' they do call to me, they bid me take my place among them.
in the Halls of Valhalla, where the brave may live forever.

It's a question of what you want here. If she lost her virginity, her personality has probably changed. Is she the same girl you knew back then? Do you know if time has made you two more or less compatible?

I would definitely tell her how you feel about the virginity issue- if you don't bring it up now, it will only become a bigger issue later.

As far as getting the relationship back, is depends on a couple of factors. Is it in your best interest to have an LTR with a different girl? Or maybe stay single? If you are convinced that an LTR with her is the healthiest thing for you, go for it.

As far as getting her to chase you- from what I gathered, she's doing some chasing already. If you want an LTR, you can have her chase you for a bit more, but from what I gather, you are already the prize- don't push her away by trying to get her to chase you.

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-The good can never be measured, but the great can never be controlled-

*sigh* to be young again...

Same situation my man, but I'm still in the friend zone with the girl.

I say go for it, once you f-close her I'm sure the virginity thing will seem less important.

On a related note, I've taken virginity twice. First time was with a white trash nobody that didn't really matter, she was crap in bed, I made no big deal about it and dumped her.

Second time was more recent. She was a real sweetie, and we had dated previously but I'd given up on it because I was so frustrated with her refusing to sleep with me. She left the country for a while, but we chatted online occasionally and she started bringing up sexual topics, quite out of character I thought. Then she paid me a visit while sorting out some other stuff in the area, saying that she felt like she had 'unfinished business' with me. When we met she was very touchy-feely, and she revealed that she was a virgin. I took her home, we spent the night together, and I was very gentle with her. She was unable to sleep at all that night.

I took the next day off work and spent it with her. Her emotions were a little mixed up, so I was glad to be there for her, and it was a pretty romantic day we had.

And that was it. She left the country again the next day, and we've remained good long-distance friends. It's like there is a special bond between us that I don't think any other guy will have with her, and it's a nice sensation.

Sorry, I submitted before I finished.

Look... I know the feeling you have about this girl, and I'm glad that I can share something with you. Its is absolutly not as big of a deal as you believe. When I heard those words, it shocked me a bit... well a lot, but I went AWOL from work and played hacky sack for an hour to clear my thoughts. I realized that this is still the same girl that I knew before. I want you to go play an agressive sport like racket ball and clear your frustrations. Because she feels guitly about it and told you is a good sign that she still has a lot of feelings for you, so work your magic and get the girl.

Remember that the first doesn't matter...Its the last.
PS...I would like to know how this turns out, so PM me about it.

maybe she lost her Virginity with someone else cos she didnt want to be shit for you...it happens!!

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Don't Hate The Player, Hate the Game...