We shot this a while back, around 6 weeks ago. This is actually one of my first sarges during the day after going to clubs for a few months. You'll see me screw up a lot, like standing too far from her, didn't kino at opening, verbal screw ups and a lot more. But hopefully some of you will get something out of it.

So this girl is looking for a watch and I go a bit situational. We talk a bit and then I go for the #close. If anyone could give me some feedback, thanks!

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ZxupTO2Gyo[/youtube]

I think you did a good job since you accomplished what you wanted to, which was getting her number. Although you should have been body rocking as a non verbal FTC and thrown some negs to make her laugh. If you go silent and can't think of anything to say have a default story that you can always go into. Although some silence is good to see if you have attracted her by her willingness to keep the conversation going but it didn't look like it. But good job.

You did pretty good. Good job with showing you have some balls and taking control of the conversation. She seemed to be having fun, I think you needed to do two things different

fist, disqualify yourself. i got the vibe early on that she thought you were hitting on her. you were really nice to her the whole time, a Neg would have gone a long way (or some other disqualification....you had a perfect opportunity when you guessed that she was Korean, you could say "oh, my first girlfriend was korean.....I can't even talk to you anymore")

second, I agree that you telegraphed too much interest between a combination of non-body rocking and your voice tonality. you had a very 'nice' voice which seemed a bit artificial.....but really, i'm just being nit-picky, it' was a decent set

Good job man...nice to see someone from the forum posting video's of their sarges...b/c until this, Ive only seen day sarging on paper, and not actual footage...hope we see more of this in the future

Couple Points:

-It almost seemed that the more you talked the further you distanced yourself.
- you speak very monotone...might want to work on that

Otherwise well done. She even did a hair flip

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"To Give anything less than your best is to sacrifice the gift" -Prefontaine

Not a PUA just a girl offering my opinions/advice

thats great stuff dude, really enjoyed it, need more day game vids for SURE

btw some tips (things i think woulda made this a perfect pu)

-like killians said, very monotone, so just work on that and seem a bit more energetic

-body language - it didnt look like u where portraying any major confident signals (feat a bit more apart, straighten ur back, push ur shoulders back)

- kino a bit more and shoulda stood closer (but u admitted that aswell so dont know y i pointed it out)

-also a bit more energetic in general, b a bit louder! add a few hand gestures(not so much that u look like a spaz)

anyways i just watched the video and picked out as MUCH things as i could, just thought it would help u alot more !

but over all, good stuff man!

Great feedback guys, I really appreciate it. That's the reason I post my sarges so I can get critiqued, it will help me out so much and others who read it.

About my tonality, it's really bad. I'm even worse on the phone. For me it's really hard to express myself thru tonality and I will definitly need to work on it.

I hope to post some new day game video next week. I have some new footage that's hopefully worth posting.

so im lookin to log video/audio to work on my game too, just wondering how were you able to set this up?

Another thing you should have done about body language, is turned your body to be facing the shelf not her.

Displaying such a major IOI so early could be a turnoff.

Also would have been easier to open to her, by either cracking a joke at the stuffs they had in the store or something..

Still a decent set, keep it up.

Ok, firstly good on you for doing what you did. This is a good start. Let me make some suggestions on how to add to what you've already built.

1) Your tone is a little soft and for want of a better description ... AFCish. Try to make your voice stronger ... more AM.

2) You stood too sideways. You should have been more open and frontal with her and brought her into your frame. Instead of looking at watches she should have been concentrating on you.

3) From what I can see in the video I think the girl liked you. She showed the body signs that shows she was attracted to you, hair flicking, arching the neck etc. You should have cued in on these and made them work to your advantage e.g. "there is something in your hair", she'll obviously try and get it off and you can laugh at her efforts and say, "here I'll get it for you" and without giving her a chance to say yes/no just reach in there and get rid of it.

4) Compliments are good but I would not go on harping on about how good Korean BBQs are. When she said she could not cook you could have interjected with, "and you said you were all feminine"!

you could've said after you said "well you have a cool watch"

"but with that bag, you should be shopping for another!" (neg)


a good neg there?

I am also very interested in knowing what you used to record this, how much it costs to set up, etc.

Some tough love:

1. The subtleties in the tonality of your voice and the upward inflection made your opener sound pretty canned and unnatural. If I had to pin a name to the emotion you were conveying, it would be "nervous." Speak with more confidence and more downward inflections.

2. No kino until 4 and a half minutes into the set? Ouch. The less kino you give, the more seeds of awkwardness you plant.

3. The rings routine should always be combined with kino.

4. You got into a better groove later on, but your canned material sounded pretty canned. Convey more emotion!

Good shit:

1. Although sprinkling some negs here and there may have helped a lot, I am actually pretty impressed by the fact that you didn't use any, yet still executed the pickup to a number-close.

2. You seem to be on a pretty good path of learning and using cold read tactics. Keep it up and you'll be a very smooth cold reader.

3. I could tell there were some moments in your storytelling where your entire energy shifted to that of a more comfortable state, and some of your authentic and chill self shined through the cracks of the canned-glass windows. Do more of that.

That was absolutly GREAT! good job man.

Great camera work too!

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I love it

Thanks guys, the feedback so far has been great. I noticed too that my tonality goes up at the end of certain sentences, which means I'm seeking rapport. So I get what you guys mean with my tonality.

I was wearing a digital voice recorder + mic on me and later synced it with the video. Here is the equipment I use:

Olympus VN4100-PC - $50
Olympus ME-15 Mic - $25
Flip Video Ultra Series Camcorder (60 min) - $140

So for around $215 you're done, pretty cheap. The audio from the camera is very soft, so you won't hear anything. That's why you have to separate the audio and the video to get the best quality.

Learning how to be a better PUA from watching your own sarges - Priceless.