I was rereading The Game and I came across this line that I hadn't noticed before. Yes those are Style's words. Interesting to note that after the relationship from the book ended he started up stylelife.

What do you all think about the concept of "To win the game, you have to leave it.”? I know that certain things are looked down upon in the community, so it makes me think that arguably one of the greatest PUGs said this.

What about the fact that he went back into the game after his relationship ended? It seems to be that even at such a high level that he is at, at the core he is still just like a lot of us, and uses the techniques and what not as a way of coping with being alone.

And if this is too deep for you let's blame it on me being sickly, it being rainy for a couple days, and not sleeping enough due to earthquakes.

I think that to win the game, you can never leave it. When you get married you don't stop, you still have to continue being cocky/funny, being an alpha, emoting, protecting, showing that you are valued by friends and family and that other women are interested in you as well, so that you aren't only with her because she's the only one that will have you, but because you WANT her.

I'm in an exclusive relationship right now and she's having trouble opening up because of her past, but that's ok with me, just as long as she continues to show she cares and doesn't close up instead of just not telling me the things she isn't ready to yet. The last couple days she was getting distant though and was really wrapped up in her head, so I had to say something, because I won't deal with that. I want a relationship with her, I really like her, but if she isn't fulfilling my needs, then why would I make it an exclusive relationship? The only time I have an exclusive relationship is when all of my needs are being met and I don't need anyone else involved to fulfill me.

So I still have to run game even though we're in a relationship, otherwise it will fizzle out. That's why a lot guys get into this, not because they couldn't get a girl, but because it never went anywhere. I show tons of social proof with my awesome friends. I demonstrate that I will protect them and her, just as they have told her that if she hurts me, they will "rip her head off", lol. I have emoted lots to her in order to get through her barriers and issues with relationships from the past. Now I still need to demonstrate pre-selection and that I'm not just with her because she's the only one that will have me.

I was out at the club the last 2 nights and while she was being distant, I had women throwing themselves at me, althought she didn't see a ton of it, she saw some. To truly solidify it though, I got blunt. *start out high energy and serious tonality* "Sweetheart, I like you and I want to be with you, but not if you are going to distance yourself from me. I have women throwing themselves at me right now. See that girl over there? *points to HB9* I can go make out with her in under 10 seconds, but I don't.... I don't need you. But I WANT you. I don't need you, but I want you, so I'm here with you, but you've got to be here with me."

Later she appoligized, showed her affection and has been doing what she can to prove that she will open up and that she wants this too. Doesn't matter if it is the first week, or 20 years in; you still need to do stuff like this, otherwise she will lose interest and you grow apart.

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"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

~ Rye

I think what he means is that you have to eventually STOP evaluating your relationship through the veil...In other words, stop using persuasive techniques, routines, and canned material- just be yourself. Let your relationship take its natural course. But that is not to imply that you shouldn't keep it fun and exciting.

In order to emote, you have to have to display real emotion; that is, you have to have the ability to empathize with your partner. If that means letting your Alpha personality subside every now and again, then so be it.

Basically, stop evaluating your relationship in terms of how you can display higher value, or what routines you will use next.

Live an adventurous life and lead her along the way.

The following quote comes to mind:

I am willing to offer you the direct opposite of everything you ever imaginesd. If you can accept me in those terms, then you are more than welcome to come along for the ride.

bahahahahahahhaaha awesome line!!!!!

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post count doesn't mean jack in this forum
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previously known as "the_cube"
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1f_y0u_c4n_r34d_7h1s_7h3n_y0u_n33d_t0_g37_l41d

The whole point of the game is to help you exert your personality in a way people will understand and like you. But the game is is just a tool, a mask. The only way you can actually win and get the girl of your dreams is if you take off the mask, leave the game.

Well, that's just my take on it.

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http://www.solomonseagal.com

Anyone can walk into a bar and pick up a random girl.
The trick is to make the experience unforgettable to her.
A real PUA will make every women he encounters feel like she experience something once in a lifetime.

I agree with White Rose.

For me, it means that the game is over when a person admits that he is at the level he wants to be.

It means that you are finally satisfied. Fed up. Validated.

Carpe Diem.

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You don't know the future, you can't change the past. The only thing that matters is THE CURRENT MOMENT.

Or he could have made it all up =P

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Are you in highschool? Tired of reading posts about club games and stuff that doesn't work in Highschool? There is now a forum up, a community, a website, and a blog, for all the highschool pickup artists out there.
www.ap-seduction.net

I feel sad for anyone that uses game as a mask. I use it to convey my true self and my personality that I had trouble unleashing before.

If you think that once you have a girl you have to drop your game and take off that mask, then she's gonna be in for a shock when she realises that she's not with the man that she got into a relationship with.

You think that after you've gotten married you no longer have to tease each other to keep sexual tension, or that you jump through all her hoops and don't make her jump through any of yours first? You think that you no longer have to use the tools you have learned to enhance your communication abilities and you can instead revert to being a closed off individual?

Becoming a PUA is about self improvement and becoming the best you that you can be, so if you ditch all that, then your efforts were in vain.

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"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

~ Rye

everyone will precieve things in a different light...i believe that statement speaks to different people in different ways.

to me it says:

to truely grasp "the game" not only do you have to be in it, understand it and actively persue it but you also have to step outside of it, to view it as an outsider, not only to understand how it works but how it does not. To understand the womans and AFC's point of view.

when you can take into account everything within the game and everything thats outside of it do you truely conquer it.

People are habitual creatures...being in the game so long it becomes automatic with the openers, routines and closes. You forget what it was like to be an AFC. The moment you step outside of the game and look at it, see it for what it is and what it means to you, thats really the only time you gain control. Balance is key

~ Mystic

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"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one."

Game doesn't ever leave you, you just become natural and better at socializing with human beings.

oh my.. Dude, I think your great solution is 100% of the problem. I'll try and use an extra large amount of empathy and try and put myself in her place. Obviously she has some emotional baggage that she dosent really like. Why isnt she telling you it? Because shes ashamed of it, and she is afraid about what you might think of her afterward. Saying 'I'll just go and make out with that girl if you dont divulge me all your secrets and commit to being my little mind slave' I dont think this going to make her keen to tell you things. Maybe I'm wrong, maybe women are that easy.

I cant help but read what you've said and think of the many millions of hapily married and very much in love elderly couples. Neither of them are 'running game' on each other. Then I think about all the couples that I've seen that come from things like the game, Neil and all his (all broken) that sweater guys (broken) I'm sure you'll go off on a rant and name many that i dont know, but you cant tell me you dont see something odd with what 'happy' marriage is compared with 'game filled' marriage.

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'Oh my, you sir are the Moriarty of self awareness and personnal refelection'

What a title!

I agree with Mr Fahrenheit... While I may not have been doing this as long as some of you, I do not see a long term marriage can be based on PUA games. I do, however, think that certain aspects of the game can be used throughout your entire life, such as being an alpha male and being able to talk to most anyone, but hopefully these qualities will be part of you and you won't have to force it all the time... Then again, I've never been married (and don't plan on it anytime soon), so I could be wrong...

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Time to go to work...

Most married couples that I have met that don't use any of the techniques that PUAs use, such as teasing each other, making sure that if they want you to jump through a hoop, you make them jump through some as well (maintaining equality), keeping up sexual tension, etc, are usually fairly stale, with a lot of issues and bickering. THE healthiest marriage I have ever witnessed, was the one between my aunt and uncle before he died and they continued to tease each other and use many tactics employed by PUAs after being together for close to 15 years.

If you read what I said and don't view it from the perspective of someone that uses stuff employed by PUAs such as Ross Jefferies, but instead from an emotional connective level, then you would realise that what I said had nothing to do with manipulation. I wasn't telling her to disclose her secrets and I really don't want her to, unless she is comfortable letting them out, for she will resent me because of pushing her too far, too fast. What I was saying to her, was that I was with her because I choose to be, even though I could be with any other girl and so she should be more secure in the knowledge that I desire the relationship to work.

Just because a person has things in their past that they don't want to disclose right off the bat, doesn't mean that they are ashamed of them. There are a lot of people in this world that have been through traumatic events that you can't even begin to fathom. I have been through some horrid shit in my life, such as I mentioned with my uncle, who was my best friend, father figure and the most important person in my life, dying for unexplained reasons at an early age, leaving his wife and unborn son alone. Even though I have been through terrible things such as that and much more, that doesn't mean that I am going to tell people right off the bat if I don't think they will understand. There are also things that are far far far worse than that, that other people have been through, that most people could never understand, so they are wary of disclosing that information, for fear of hurting themselves further.

You should try not to be so quick to jump to conclusions about things that you have limited information about. The capacity to truly understand another person, means that you have the ability to give them the benifit of the doubt and not judge them without sufficient evidence. Empathy is a very useful skill as a PUA, because not every person you meet will be unscathed by life.

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"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

~ Rye

Did you even read what he wrote? He's not threatening her with making out with girls. He's telling her that he has options, and that his commitment to her his by choice, not obligation. If anything, this ought to make her feel more cared for, because he obviously finds something about her that makes it worth sticking around--possibly with other women of greater beauty
I genuinely wonder where these "happily married elderly couples" are. Now I have met a few, but for the most part, the elderly couples I have met constantly gripe and nag at each other. I suspect this idea that there are lots of happily married old folks around is a romantic notion more than anything.

However, I have met a few happily married couples. There seem to be two general types--

The more common of the two are the ones who have just grown old together, and their connection forces them to accept the other unconditionally. These are the couples who end up being genuine "best friends", and can spend all day with each other because they are so familiar--they know each other almost as well as they know themselves. You are really in some ways the same person, because you have spent so much time you have deeply influenced the other--a bit like two trees that grow close to each other--their roots and branches become so entwined that they leave a powerful imprint on each other's permanent growth, and it would cause great damage to separate. There is certainly love here, but it is the sort of love that brothers or close friends have. Sexual chemistry and attraction is not necessary for this.

The much more uncommon type are the ones that are truly romantically in love. These are the ones that are still very much attracted to one another--the ones where they tease each other, they are still social and have other friends, and they do all the important things to flip the attraction switches. The true beauty of their marriage is that their game is so well calibrated to each other, they are in a constant interplay that each of them knows incredibly well. The competition becomes a sort of dance--have you ever seen two amazingly talented boxers, chess players, hell even computer gamers that are familiar with each other's games? There is a remarkable beauty in their exchange.

This last relationship is the only one that I ever want to lead.

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Lo' there do I see My Father.
Lo' there do I see the line of My People, back to the beginning.
Lo' they do call to me, they bid me take my place among them.
in the Halls of Valhalla, where the brave may live forever.

I think the mistake is to view it as a game and forced. Think of it instead as a sport--sport is a chance for us to have other human beings push us to excel. If you've ever played a sport for a long, long time, you know that the movements become natural--there is nothing forced about it. A healthy partnership ought to force us to be the best we can be to keep us in the running with each other.

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Lo' there do I see My Father.
Lo' there do I see the line of My People, back to the beginning.
Lo' they do call to me, they bid me take my place among them.
in the Halls of Valhalla, where the brave may live forever.