looking for the guy.....



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 Post subject: looking for the guy.....
PostPosted: Mon Mar 31, 2008 10:47 pm 
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alright this isnt really much of a question for advice but i suppose we could turn it into one. anywho-

im looking for the guy who mentioned using the line (who he learned from his older sister or somehting):

"this is so we can't be friends" and then laying a kiss on the gal

if anyone knows what thread im talking about itd be dope to get a link, or refer me to him.

but to make it a question.
I'm planning on using this line on a girl just to finally get some closure on the LJBF zone situation so things will either progress or drop dead once and for all so i can officially move on. I'd just like some of your guys's advice though. i was thinking about an evening just the two of us and then bringing it up and saying something along the lines of

"so we arent gonna be friends anymore"
see what she says and play it cool while initiating kino and all that jazz
try and wrap up the conversation quickly so we dont fall into the whole expressing ourselves deal which could potentially lead to me lose control and break the tension.
and then pull that line and a long passionate kiss previously stated and leave without saying a word and wait for her response.

sound good? let me know what you guys think or would do or any other sick lines that i could use in it.

thanks guys

-mosphere

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 01, 2008 5:04 am 
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Yeah and if she doesn't go for it and you can't sell it with a bit of extra kino, attraction and comfort, then don't start begging, or anything like that, don't turn AFC. Be strong and either be cool with the LJBF thing and respect that, don't keep trying to get with her, because female friends are a good thing, they're fun, give different perspective and they are a great DHV, especially used as pivots. So don't just ditch her, unless you don't like her as a friend....in which case wanting her as a girlfriend doesn't make much sense...

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 01, 2008 6:19 am 
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i understand the whole pivot idea, but shes not very social at all. more of the shy type and is incredibly awkward in social environments with masses of people. she doesnt socialize at parties really at all, and im one of her very close friends. matter of fact. im essentially one of 3 people she hangs out with in consistency (the other 2 are girls) so id say i play quite the role in her social life seeing is how there really isnt anyone else other than us.

she knows i like her, or at least knew. she gave me the ljbf talk a while back and since then ive just been playing it cool with the hanging out and teasing her, gotten her jealous in the past a couple of times and she is aware that other ladies have their eyes on me, all the things im supposed to be doing, so who knows if ive finally flipped those attraction switches around.

i had a bad case of oneitis with her a while back and while i still believe i do, it has gotten better and ive been playing the game with every girl i run into these days. it has certainly taken my mind of her but im still interested. so basically like i said, i want it to swing one way or another but not in the middle where we are friends. im getting exhausted and frustruated with it all so i wanna throw it all on the line and take some serious control over the situation (she is very undecisive and never takes initiative) in hopes of getting closure to it all and then when i make a solid recovery maybe come back into her life again if things dont go the way i want em to.

but yo, any clues on what to say?

my friend and i (who is also aware of the game) were discussing, and forgive me for over-analyzing the situation, but its just been crossing my mind on how it should work best.

i was planning on doing this at the end of a night, at her place so i can just leave when im done, after watching a movie we saw on one of our first little dates, which we had a great time at (using it to trigger those emotions we had back when there was mutual attraction) when we just sit and talk on her couch. but he thinks i should just come with it smack in the middle of it out nowhere. is there anyway i can escalate this subject and get to it? or should i just cut to the chase?

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 01, 2008 6:20 am 
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Be sure you don't give her a choice by saying something like "Close your eyes" as that supplicates to her and she knows exactly what's coming. Just get close enough and do it if this is your plan, be alpha.

I hear you about wanting to either take it to the next level or just letting things drop, I'm the same way. Just be very careful, I only get that mentality when I'm down with a bad case of oneitis and washing my hands of the girl is how I get over it.


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 01, 2008 6:26 am 
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what do you mean by be careful? i mean yeah i enjoy friends better than nothing. but its been killing me inside for a while ever since i got that stupid talk. im so happy when im around her, and then i kinda reflect on how things arent going the way i want, and the constant living on the edge of thinking if i still have a chance, and its gone on for way too long. i know itll be hard if things go to shit, but like i said its gone on for too long and i just need to conclude it to clear my head

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 01, 2008 6:28 am 
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Just what Zig said.

Also, if you are gonna watch a movie you watched from one of your early "little dates", make sure you don't do it in a way that makes a big deal out of it and you look like an AFC that is trying to treat her like she's special. Watch the movie because you want to watch the movie, or watch one that you do want to watch, because that will be far more powerful than trying to make her remember how she felt when you watched it before.

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 01, 2008 6:30 am 
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nah its not a big deal. matter of fact i think she wanted to watch it cause her lil sis bought it and while it wasnt a horrible movie, we joked a lot about it. anywho like i said im certainly not forcing it on her but its been kind of a mutual agreement between us to watch it again for kicks

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 01, 2008 6:52 am 
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what do you mean by be careful? i mean yeah i enjoy friends better than nothing. but its been killing me inside for a while ever since i got that stupid talk. im so happy when im around her, and then i kinda reflect on how things arent going the way i want, and the constant living on the edge of thinking if i still have a chance, and its gone on for way too long. i know itll be hard if things go to shit, but like i said its gone on for too long and i just need to conclude it to clear my head
I think I would say that if that's how you feel, then you need to get away from this girl for a while. Even if she's into you, if you go right for it and don't get yourself under better control, then you're just gonna lose it, because you're too involved. You can't let anyone else dictate your happiness and if not being with her, is tearing you up, then that's what is happening and you need to get control of your emotions back, or you'll just be an AFC.

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 01, 2008 7:13 am 
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Rye is right on with this. Before I say anything else this is indeed oneitis, what you really should do is GFTOW (Go Fuck Ten Other Women) and realize while she might be really cool, there are a ton of other really cool women out there that can make you just as happy (if not happier) then she can.

That being said, having been there myself only a month or so ago don't make the same mistake I made. When you "put it all on the line" you really are about to destroy the friendship. I'm going to be brutally honest with you and go a little AFC. You know deep down if she wants to be with you or not already. What is the voice in your head telling you? She already gave you the LJBF speech, has SHE done anything to make you believe that that is no longer the case?

The mistake I made was despite having run great game in the process of going from AFC to rAFC I pushed too hard too fast. If I had waited to "put it on the line" I would have known that doing so was a bad idea. Continuing to game her and throw the attraction switches would have been a much better idea, while at the same time going out and working on GFTOW and keeping her on the back burner.

The only thing that is going to happen if you go for broke is that you'll be able to say to yourself, "Hey, I tried, she didn't want me and I can move on." Fuck that, YOU are the prize not her! You have her up on a pedestal, you need to take her off of it and understand that you are a high value male. If she doesn't see that then she's an idiot and it's HER LOSS not yours.

In summary, unless you really just want to just end things I'd continue to game her while working on your inner game. It's possible that down the road things might be different but from what you are saying if you tried anything right now it's only going to end badly.


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PostPosted: Tue Apr 01, 2008 11:04 pm 
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:cry: *sniff sniff* Brings a tear to my eye to see the man you're turning into Zig. :wink:

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PostPosted: Tue Apr 01, 2008 11:23 pm 
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zyg i see where youre coming from and i understand completely. however, unfortunately my mind isnt wired like that in this situation. i KNOW FOR A FACT, that i am of higher value than her and that its her loss without me. not just saying that to try and make myself feel better, but it is clearly shown from many people's perspectives that i am way above her no doubt.

i dont think im running into this too fast either. fellow pua's have been saying its taken too long and its about time. ive been throwing the game her way and attraction switches, and despite what i think about the possible outcome (for the record i feel quite confident), i know i am ready to do this. theres a handful of other women ive been gaming so ive definately got some options to move on and progress with. i gotta make something happen out of this, cause i feel kinda stupid waiting for something to happen cause i know she wont do anything.

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 02, 2008 1:52 am 
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If she's not interested, then you shouldn't feel stupid for not having something come of this. You learned and then you move on.

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"The 'Brick Walls' are there to allow you to prove how badly you want something!" ~ Randy Pausch

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