Thought Id come here as you guys seem to be my last resort(all the good information in here, if that doesnt work for me then nothing will).
Im a 24 year old(going on 25) who has never had a girlfriend or even managed to attract a girl, people treat me like im a leper.
I need to make up for the 9 years Ive lost in my life and enjoy the times I should have had, life is pointless living the way I do and I want to change it right now.
I decided a few months back that I dont deserve it and my life shouldnt be like this.
Thing is ive got nothing going for me, im thin, ugly looking, thinning hair(always been thin though so hopefully I will keep it until im at least 40 its the only nice feature on me), mild acne and my nerves get the better of me at times, ive suffered with depression as ive had a lot of tragedy in my life.
I dont want my life to be remembered like this, I get one shot at it so I dont want my life to always be like this, I need to know it was all worth it when Im a old man because so far it hasnt been worth shit.
So far ive made plans to get fit, improve my body, cut down on alcohol and look after myself cosmetically.
I have very few friends(although they are good friends) so any other advice(good advice only) will be welcome guys.
No other forum has been able to help me hopefully you guys can.

Can I be helped and can my life be turned around or is it too late? The silence makes me think it cant?
Just with my history things probably wont change

Well can it yes or no?
Is it worth me carrying on or am I just wasting my time as per usual?

http://www.t-nation.com/portal_includes ... ature.html

I think you ought to read this. It is aimed towards physical fitness, but I think its worth you taking a look at a gleaning some from.

You have a lot of negative thoughts about yourself--I am ugly, people hate me, etc. Having negative thoughts isn't bad, in fact, it is ultimately what will drive you to success. But you have to start making active choices about your future, starting now. You've already taken a few good steps--cutting down on alcohol, improving your appearance...even coming on here was a good step.

I think that your first goal shouldn't be to get girls to like you--that will comes with time. You should aim at getting people to like you in general.

I have a feeling that you are a pretty well-meaning dude, but you come off as need, abrasive, rude, or some other negative trait that turns people off. For example, in this thread along, you didn't even wait an hour before deciding that the silence has now spoken volumes, and that you have to accept that you are doomed to failure. You sound needy. That is not a criticism, just a assessment of my perception of you. Maybe you aren't, but while I felt for you in your first post and wanted to help you, your subsequent posts made it sound like you were just going to be a whiny student who would go belly-up at the first problem.

First, you need to make a commitment to change. Don't expect others to change you. This is the fundamental difference between success and failure--failures blame others and other things for their problems (I'm not smart enough, I'm not good looking enough, I'm not socially skilled enough, people are just mean, women are bitches). People who succeed take responsibility for anything they need to, and then they CHOOSE to make the change.

I think a lot of people can help you, but you need to choose to change.

_________________
Lo' there do I see My Father.
Lo' there do I see the line of My People, back to the beginning.
Lo' they do call to me, they bid me take my place among them.
in the Halls of Valhalla, where the brave may live forever.

Man, just like Fiction said, you have lots of limiting beliefs, lots of negativity. That's the first thing you have to change. Cutting alcohol is a big step.

Before you can get a girl, you need to be attractive. Your body style and your hair is important but not the major factor in this. The right attitude and lifestyle are much more important.

You do have things going on for yourself, you just need to focus on those things more than on the negative stuff. Before you start reading the openers and rutines or whatever, read over things about the inner game. That's the single most important thing for you ringht now.

Good luck to you and cheer up, you'll find some things here that might turn your life around if you dedicate yourself!

Drop me a PM if you need anything

_________________
This game is automatic. You give it to 'em one time, they come back like addicts.

Cheers for the advice dude, much appreciated.
Thing is Ive tried almost everything to attract girls but no one is ever interested in me, for example on my facebook theres a question asking how many girls would date me out of 14 votes guess how many picked no....you guessed it 14! Girls ive been attracted to on Myspace ive tried to talk to them just to be ignored and when im out girls avoid me like the plague.
Im a really nice guy who would treat a girl right but girls just like arseholes who treat them like shit. It makes me wonder if I should start following this attitude

Gah. Dude...why are you working with things like Facebook or Myspace? You want to put your best foot forward, and Facebook/Myspace, particularly for you, is not the best way to go.

You quite obviously have social issues that extend well beyond your difficulties with women. What's more, your personal issues are atrocious as well--you are needy, selfish, and give off a "I am victimized" vibe.

And this...
...goes to show you know nothing of the thought process of a women. Take this as a good thing, because it can be learned, and chances are the things you have been attributing to your failures are incorrect.

_________________
Lo' there do I see My Father.
Lo' there do I see the line of My People, back to the beginning.
Lo' they do call to me, they bid me take my place among them.
in the Halls of Valhalla, where the brave may live forever.

The Game is for the nice guys that would treat a girl right, who learn not to display that right away. It's a turnoff, and it will teach you not to display it.
Just being a jerk doesn't work either. It just looks like it, and it's also something you'll learn.
Pick up some books, you have a long way to go, but it's a fun process.

_________________
This game is automatic. You give it to 'em one time, they come back like addicts.

Im honestly not selfish or needy, if anything Im a survivor. I wont pretend everything has been fine and dandy because I havent been blessed with the same luck and opportunities as the people around me, life has been a lot more difficult.
All I can do is try and change my life but the longer it goes on then the less likely that change is going to happen and things will finally work out the way they should.

Fiction was doing a bit of "tough love" on you. You're probably not needy but you do have a lot of negative thoughts. You just need to work through that, and it's not really that hard. I don't know if you've been like that your whole life, but all of us feel low at one point or another. It's about knowing how to crawl your way out of it.
Start looking into some inner game stuff and positive thinking NLP before you get into the picku-up rutines.
Stick with this forum bro and you'll be just fine.

And Fiction, don't you think you're being a little too hard on him?
You might be trying to give some constructive criticism, but I don't see the constructive part of it. I've seen you give good advice before, what's up?

_________________
This game is automatic. You give it to 'em one time, they come back like addicts.

Sl!ck and Fiction have it right. Your inner game is going to be the most important thing. In the past i ahve had the exact same thoughts as you. "Why do the assholes always get the girls blah blah blah." Realize that it has nothing to do with everyone else and everything to do with you. We all have our sob stories. The guys that succeed put that in the past and move on. The guys that fail constantly think about their failures feel sorry for themselves and wonder why they are failures. Its time to move on. Create your own opportunites cause no one is going to do it for you. Some people are born with a silver spoon in their mouth and some people are born crack babies. Life aint fair.

The reason people are turned off by you and have a bad perception of you is because you have a bad perception of yourself. Cutting the alcohol is great. Work out, get a hobby play the guitar, paint, rock climb do something that will make you a more interesting person so that you have something to talk about that would actually interest people. Post up your myspace/facebook and we can critique and help out. The first step is aknowleding your problem, now is the time to act. Picking up women is secondary right now. You have gone this long w/o a gf, be patient work on your inner game and learn to project yourself in a better light. When you start to walk with confidence and you start visualizing yourself in a better light people will do the same. Attracting women will become easy. Besides, Style didnt begin hes jouney into the game until mid to late 20's. you have plenty of time.

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success is my only mother fucking option, failure is not.

Yeah, you're probably right I was a little harsh. I sent him a PM earlier and told him I could email him some stuff.

Honestly, it comes down to him. If he really wants to make the change, then I applaud him and this is certainly an excellent resource to begin improving yourself.


Resurrection: Don't let my previous comment affect your self-perception/esteem. If that is really not how you are, then just realize that you have a presentation problem. In fact, this should be evident in your other social difficulties.

It's a simple matter--if you're already a great guy, then you just need to work on getting it out there and getting it recieved well. The substance is laready there, you just need to improve the rhetoric. It's like a politician delivering a speech or a salesman pushing a product--it could be the best legislation in the world or the most phenomenal marchandise, but if your presentation is poor, no one is ever going to know it and thus will never be able to experience it.

But the hard part is already done--you have a good product. The best salesmen are the ones who actually believe in what they're selling. Then when they are selling it, they know that they are doing the customers a favor instead of just closing a deal.


As for constructive criticism--I suggest reading the Mystery Method: How To Get Beautiful Women In Bed With You, followed by the Stylelife challenge. You might also read The Game, as you might be able to relate to Niel Strauss.

How is the rest of your personal life?

_________________
Lo' there do I see My Father.
Lo' there do I see the line of My People, back to the beginning.
Lo' they do call to me, they bid me take my place among them.
in the Halls of Valhalla, where the brave may live forever.