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i have been in some dates where it went well, i was confident made no mistakes, everything was fine, but they lost interest the next time we talk or meet again. I get in some dates they are expecting something whether its sex or a long relationship, I just cant tell which feelings they are trying to portray.
Honestly... she will conform to whatever frame you put her in. It is actually your job as a man to lead the interaction and direct her to where you want it to go.
These girls probably lost interest because you came off like you didn't know what you wanted. That is an unattractive quality in a man.
She does control the speed at which sex occurs but you can always test the waters by pinging with sexual comments and setting up sexual frames that will make her more comfortable.
S