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Dude... Beating someone up is NOT a DHV story. Girls will think you're just some pathetic street thug.
Think about it. If a girl is out somewhere, and see's a guy just start belting another guy, she is not going to think 'Wow, that guy is so tough'! She will think 'Oh, that poor guy who is getting beaten up'...
Grape, Im not sure you are getting the concept of DHV stories. It means 'Display Higher Value'.
I cannot see the slightest hint of you displaying any higher value in either of those stories, whatsoever.
- A fat girl ran in to you, then a girl congratulated her, so you swore at her, and she rubbed her ass on you cos she is a dirty hussy.
- You bounce on a trampoline and avoid a cat...
Another tip: Girls don't think swearing is cool, tough, attractive, pleasant. Having a girl swear in the first sentance that she says to me is a pretty big turn off. It shows that someone isn't educated enough to express themselves without having to resort to foul language.
You're cool. The girl swears, not me. And this is a true story so I can tell it the way it is, and swearing is funny when you use the RIGHT DELIVERY.
That's the concept you're not getting.
I can DHV by showing I'm not afraid to show her my vulnerability for animals. Swinggcat stuff here..
Dude, stories don't have to be great at ALL. As long as you tell it right and it has visual humor, with a punchline, you're good.