Hahaha. Man just the way you wrote this made me laugh my ass off!
Remember to check the part on thier profile which states "body type".
Quote:
okay, so you know ive gone and almost perfecected my online game. its not that hard to do at all. i mean, i dont just sit there at the pc and open girls all day. its just a side project, when i have down time. anyways, im sure you know of the BFD i was trying to pull. not the one that wants to sleep with me, no questions asked. its the other one i posted lol. anyways, heres the story of our first meet:
i pull up to her house. i call her and playfully tell her that im creeping very slowly by her house in a big red kidnapping van. she knows i was coming to meet her, so she laughs and opens the door.
she steps out, and i immediately take notice of her figure, outlined in a v-neck t shirt and some short shorts. i get out, nicley smile and open the door for her.
we get to the resturaunt, and i cant seem to keep my eyes off that v neck of hers. it is just so revealing, showing off her nice, round.....FAT. holy god, was she big. now i know the reason why she had no body shots. and that accent...dear jesus, half hispanic mixed with a country twang.
so were eating our food. i was watching her slowly chew, all the while it seemed the sauce wanted to burst forward from her mouth any minute. i was keeping small talk, all while the fluids slowly inched down her chin. "you got a little something there, dear."
she stabs at her food, and somehow, the sauce from her plate splashes everywhere. apparently her fork slipped. so now i have to watch herself clean off, like an animal grooming.
we get up to leave for the movie, and the innertube under her shirt seems like its struggling to get free. she sits in the car, and i swear it was a miracle the hubcaps didnt burst from the seams. we get there, and her boyfriend calls mid movie. i enjoy myself for once, and even consider opening the hb next to me.
she gets back, and makes some small talk, "oh he doesnt like the fact that im out with you, but i told him he can trust you" me: "yeah, believe me, im not going to try anything."
side note: even if she was hot, i wouldnt probably since the bf's in the army, training and i know how hhard it is since i got a friendin there now. i recommend the same for all you pua's, its psychologically tough enough in there, and he doesnt need to find out his girls cheating while hes getting gassed and shot at.
anyways, after the movie, i dropped that thing home and went out, skated, partied, # closed a sonic worker and showered those damn cooties off.
moral: GET. BODY. SHOTS.
bahahahaha.