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Most pickup artists see mating as an adversarial zero-sum game – for one side to benefit, the other side has to lose out.
That’s bullshit. It can be win-win – guys and girls often want the same things.
Yes, yes, and yes. I wholeheartedly agree with this.
This is one of the things that are at the core of what I teach.
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Also, most of the PUA material views women in a very toxic, angry way. This doesn’t help guys (or women).
Again, yes. The PUA community may have birthed the "manosphere" and an assload of MRA fags. They're bitter about women having power over them when in reality they REALLY need to check their privilege.
I probably understand and see the privilege I have as a man because I already experienced what its like to NOT have privilege as a racial minority growing up in the Bible Belt of the US. White dudes cannot possibly have any idea.
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Very little of what pickup artists do and say focuses on understanding women in any real way.
But it’s not their fault – the pickup community was developed by autistics and sociopaths in a world that had no actionable, effective guidance for men on how to meet and interact with women successfully.
That's just Mystery and his followers.
Other teachers like Zan Perrion and myself focus a lot on mutual understanding.
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PUA’s exist because our society failed to teach men the right things about women, and the whole was filled by them.
A lot of guys use PUA material as a bridge to what actually works, so in that way, it’s definitely helped many guys.
One positive of the PUA community: for a lot of guys it’s the first time they’ve actually consciously thought about their own mating value, how to improve, etc.
Yup.
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The majority of PUA information focuses on bars and clubs – because that’s the only location that most of them have ever learnt how to interact with women.
This is not beneficial for the majority of guys, since bars and clubs are among the worst places to meet women.
It's also because women actually doll themselves up to look their best when they go clubbing. Therefore, such places will naturally draw more of our attention. Another reason is that many guys rely too much on liquid confidence to talk to women. Focusing on bars and clubs to meet women is not just a PUA norm - it's a societal norm.
And it's only among the "worst" places to meet women if you're looking for something more meaningful than a fling. But not everyone is looking for something more meaningful than a fling.
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There’s a skewed view of what constitutes “success” for pickup artists – they look up to guys who can number-close a 9 in 5 minutes. This is not actual success.
That's just Mystery and his followers. And those Simple Pickup dudes. And that Keys to the VIP bullshit.
OK, I guess too much of our community does actually think of number-closing as a success. But, for a newbie who isn't used to talking to women, that can definitely be a small success worth celebrating. Not necessarily worth marketing, though.
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Some pickup artists are better than others. Some focus more on making guys more attractive, comfortable and confident, as opposed to learning how to manipulate and trick women.
Thank you.
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The big question you should ask is: How much of their information are these guys SPAM for free? If it’s not a lot, then they’re probably trying to scam you, and sadly, this is what most PUA’s are trying to do to guys.
We focus on actually helping guys, which is why all of our most important information will be free or near-free (book prices). Any paid products etc. will exist to save you time and effort – but the information will be the same, because our goal is not to exploit men but to help them.
I believe most of us give a ton of free information. I and other PUAs who actually have something to sell post free advice on forums, give free info through our mailing lists, answer questions for free all the time, give away free content all the time, post free content on their blogs (
like my blog here), etc.
Near-free? How about $9 for an ebook valued at $47? I'm also letting people join Seductive Introvert for just $1 if they buy my ebook. I've actually been losing money on this shit so far. A lot of marketers will try to prey on the PUA community members' wallets, but there will always be those of us who genuinely care about helping people first and foremost. The same goes for any other industry.
Actually, I'm pretty sure EVERYONE in the industry gives out a bunch of information for free. Maybe except for the ones who focus primarily on the marketing and profits side of it like that Tao of Badass dude. But maybe even he gave out free information and I just didn't bother taking a look.
On a related note, I will soon be releasing a free PDF on how you can make sure to have a perfect date with a woman that ends in sex and guarantees a second date, so keep an eye out for that, guys!
The truth is, though, these guys on this "Mating Grounds" website is just another chain in the link that is the PUA Community. For marketing purposes a lot of people will try to separate themselves from the rest of the PUA Community, criticize the community, pretend to have an "outside perspective," but the reality is that, if you're teaching something related to men being successful with women in any way, you're part of the PUA community.