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I have posted A LOT of shitty threads in the past (that is an understatement) and gone off on a lot of you. Wish I could add value to this forum but I cannot. Here is the deal. A lot of my issues (college, race/attraction, etc.) are things I just cannot talk to people about in real life. I come on this forum and some others and see guys who seem to be knowledgeable about a lot of things and just feel the need to have my voice be heard by them and have them as friends I never had the chance to make in real life.
I am one of the very few kids from my high school to go off to college. Then I arrive at college and cannot relate to a lot of the kids and even when I try to better my chances of making friends and getting laid I fall flat on my face.
Maybe some people post on forums and hide the fact that their life fucking sucks, other post on forums because they just enjoy it, and some post on forums because they want to help people.
I have had high points in my life but right now, my life is at a low when it comes to social life and hookups. One day I had a dream that I would occasionally come on forums and that would be as a better person who helps others down on their luck.
But unfortunately I have mostly used my time here to let it all out. To let things that bother me out and hope that someone offers me some hope or relief from it all. Hope that someone gives me advice and things change.
To some extent they really have, I no longer get as insecure about my race but hey, here I am bitching about college these days....
I just wish there were thing I could do to take my mind off of it all but my mind is still stuck on it. No matter what I do I still want that awesome social life with cool friends and a chance to date attractive girls (the kind I like). And my mind keeps fixating on it for some reason too.
Mate again I'm not trying to be harsh here, but your shame is as much of an attention-seeking device as anything else.
FWIW, you were off the forums for a while and then came back showing a much stronger frame. I was impressed. It's clear that you're not learning nothing, even if you're frustrated because you would want to achieve more.
I know that I wrote a harsh comment or two before and that's because I was so frustrated that you seemingly refused to LISTEN. I was just checking out a forum I used to post on years ago (not PUA, something else), and reading it I realised what an awesome forum it was and how knowledgeable some of the people were. But I used it to seek attention and to try and splatter my personal issues over it in the hope of finding some resolution, very much like you have on here (to be fair this was back in my 20s which I believe is where you are now).
The bottom line is, Paramount, your need to speak instead of listening is your biggest flaw. I was the same when I was younger. I would ask people questions and ask for help, but it was all an excuse to talk more. I didn't need solutions. I needed attention. Unfortunately no amount I received would compel me to shut the fuck up and actually listen to others who were wiser and more knowledgeable than me.