Quote:
Why do you want to hang out with her?
Trust me, right now I'm fresh out of a relationship with a girl who I'm still madly in love with her.
But hanging out with her and seeing her happy with someone else isn't going to help me one bit.
Sam
I want to hangout with her because I enjoy her company (and her child's). Just not enough to the point where I want to be in a LTR with her or have sex with her. I don't actually think I'm in romantic love with her. When she said she loved her boyfriend and stuff I was just totally cool with it. I didn't feel any negative emotions or energy from it. Some how it made me feel more confident and more rooted into my reality.
For instance last night. She posted a picture she drew of her an her boyfriend (she's an amazing artist) on facebook saying how much she loves him. To me it felt like this. Imagine someone shooting a cannon of potential heartbreak/depression energy at you, as it comes near you, you feel it hit your shield of positive energy and your shield deflects it. I felt the initial hit of feeling something negative, but then it just deflected. Which in return I think it made me for confident in my shield.
I'm not saying I don't feel emotions either. I feel a wide range of positive emotions and sometimes very strongly. It's just negative emotions just don't seem to stick to me anymore. They don't become a static thought process anymore. It's something really new for me and I don't quite understand it.
I think the main of it is I was used to feeling rejection (emotionally) from people and I think I made rejection feel like a static process. Like if a girl did reject me then I should automatically feel rejected and have it really effect me.