LR (SNL): Celebrity News Reporter



Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 3 guests
Post new topic Reply to topic   Board index » Real Life Gaming » Lay Reports

Unanswered topics | Active topics | New posts | Your posts





  Print view Previous topic | Next topic 
Author Message
JohnCooper
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 2:02 am 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Thu Sep 29, 2011 2:18 pm
Posts: 20
I always say to my students, opening is an opportunity.  Even if they are not hot, you should get into the habit of seeing the value in EVERYONE.  I decide to chat to a ropey looking girl in central London sat by a fountain.  It turns out she knows some places to get cheap flights to Aus and also has connections in Melbourne where i'm off to for the summer. Namely her half sister who looks quite fit in her facebook pics.

So i'm in melbourne on a Thurs night and one of my plans has fallen through, so I ring this chick to meet her.  I turn up to what is a posh part of melbourne.  My skinny jeans, 'emo hood' and doc martins look bang out of place.  I am greeted by her and her suited up 'media' friends including a guy  called 'Big Tony'.

This chick turns out to be a producer for a TV news channel.  She is a bit plain with just an eye for a flattering facebook photo.  Her hotter girl friend is sat on the table and is on a date with some muscle mary.  It turns out he is an AFL footballer.  (the equivalent of a premiership footballer over there)

I observe, and she looks bored as hell, her eyes constantly darting off in the opposite direction to the guy.  I work my way in and chat to her and the guy.    I dick around with her and I'm not even trying to win her over but it's noticeable that i'm providing the rock n' roll archetype she is craving.  The AFL footy player doesnt know whats hit him.  Sport vs Game in action i guess!  He trundles off to get himself another pathetic pint, I help myself to her glass of wine!

One of the most important principles that we teach is knowing how to fire off strong intent - something which gets totally overlooked in the industry.  It's working and she's now laughing at all my jokes and I can feel she wants my willy, so whilst she's on an emotional high, I take her upstairs for a jointcocktail.  I always find having the same drink as the girl helps build rapport.  I'll never have a beer if they drink wine for e.g  infact I'll never drink pints infront of a girl.  It feels a bit clumsy to me.

Big Tony invites us all to his pad, and she laughs off her date to join us. This guys pad is like something out of Thunderbirds, with moving walls, and indoor swimming pool.  

When the other 2 go out the room for a cigarette, i yank her hair back from her pony tail and give her a spiderman kiss.  She's clearly wet from this.  And i know i just have to extract her now.

"Shall we get out of here"  Holding strong intent.

We wave a cab and go back to her apartment, and we get it on for about 2 hours before we collapse into a drunken coma.  Her alarm goes off at 6am.  Grumpy I ask her "Why the fuck have you set your alarm for 6am?.  "I'm reporting this morning!"  It turns out she is a well known tv reporter in Aus.  I am rock solid in the morning and in need of  working a double shift, but she won't even touch it. Selfish cow, so i wank myself off, whilst looking at her like some dirty old man!

_________________
My Blog: thejohncooper.com
Top
   
Reply with quote  
Mack 2.0
PostPosted: Thu Oct 06, 2011 2:37 am 
Offline
PUA Forum Leader
User avatar

Joined: Sat Jan 01, 2011 9:05 pm
Posts: 2702
Quote:
Selfish cow, so i wank myself off, whilst looking at her like some dirty old man!
holy crap, i laughed so hilariously at this point.

_________________
what dr. house brings to medicine, i bring to everyday life (an extreme dose of cynicism), don't listen to the curmudgeon!
Top
   
Reply with quote  
niva56
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Wed Oct 12, 2011 8:26 am 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Wed Oct 12, 2011 8:12 am
Posts: 5
You, sir, are a hero.
Top
   
Reply with quote  
gotcha
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Fri Oct 14, 2011 10:44 am 
Offline
MPUA Forum Enthusiast

Joined: Mon Nov 22, 2010 1:19 pm
Posts: 65
Location: AUS
That was awesome. Inspiring shit right hurr.

_________________
Life is what you make it
Top
   
Reply with quote  
Max DHV
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Sun Oct 23, 2011 10:47 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Fri May 13, 2011 11:48 pm
Posts: 117
Location: Perth, Australia
Great effort buddy, dying to hear who she was-I watch alota AFL. Anyway you can tell-name, her show, description? Email me if prefer. If you'd rather not tell, no sweat. Great story nevertheless. The point here is that you wouldnt have said a word to her if the AFL guys game was good and she was laughing etc? Nice.
Top
   
Reply with quote  
JohnCooper
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 25, 2011 3:21 pm 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Thu Sep 29, 2011 2:18 pm
Posts: 20
you can see her pic on LSS forum, in my LR there

_________________
My Blog: thejohncooper.com
Top
   
Reply with quote  
Max DHV
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Oct 25, 2011 8:48 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Fri May 13, 2011 11:48 pm
Posts: 117
Location: Perth, Australia
Cool-whats the LSS forum?
Top
   
Reply with quote  
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic  Reply to topic  Page 1 of 1
  [ 7 posts ] 

Board index » Real Life Gaming » Lay Reports

All times are UTC

You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  

Can we be honest?

We want your email address. Let me send you the best seduction techniques ever devised... because they are really good.
close-link