You know, I went through a process of "me against the whole god damn world"

And in that process, I didnt care, i honestly didnt give a shit what anyone thinks, acts or reacts to me.

I was fed up with living in my fear, my anxiety, withing the social rules etc.

I said enough.

And I started to do the craziest shit ever. I got a buddy of mine, we took a camera and filmed ourselves fighting in public. Thats just one example of what I did. It was much like jackass, infact, it was just like that.

And it was a relief. I got a tone of experience and most importantly, I proved to myself that I dont need approval of others. I won for me.

But after awhile of being the rebel, I got bored of rebelionship. I decided to take the next step.

After I proved to myself, that I can handle rejection infront of a large number of poeople and be ok with it... i decided to move on.

The next step was, determening who I want to be. Specificaly, how do I want to look like. What do I want to project and how do I want to talk to people.

But as I was doing this, I realized that I was putting myself in the same box as I was before. Same shit.

So I played with this for a while. Untill one day, I had it.

I couldnt take it anymore. The thoughts felt like prison, so I GAVE UP.

I said, OK, I AM NOT FIGHTING AGAINST MYSELF ANYMORE. I ACCEPT MYSELF COMPLETELY.

Strangly, this weird feeling came up for me. As if I was grieving for sombody. I went down and followed my feeling. I wanted to know where will it get me.

I locked myself into a dark room, so dark that I couldnt even see my own hand. I mean dark.

After a couple of hours of just being in that feeling, I came out. The realization I had was... I am A MAN.

And I should be a man. period.

All the answers that I was looking for were in me. I suddenly knew HOW to talk to women. I felt the conversation. The conversation came from within me, from my feeling as a man.

I wasnt in my head anymore. I knew. I felt it.

I cant picture myself using any of the rutines anymore, just because, being a real man is a lot more fun.

I enjoy my manhood. When I take a walk, and the wind is blowing into my face and my clothes are wawing in the wind, I just feel such a wawe of enjoyment of being a man.

I enjoy being a man.

All the conversations that I have now are from within. Not out of my head anymore. The realtionships with people come from me. Not from my head.

When I see a woman that I am attracted to, I feel manly. I dont go into.. o what should I say stuff. I just feel my manhood, and ride that wawe. When I say hi and she looks at me, there is no chance for rejection. She just knows.

Ive been in a game for a while now. But I feel like just started. Because from this point of view that I am now, everything is different.

Insted of fear.. I have courage.
Instead of thought.. I feel.
Instead of anxiety.. I have manhood.
Instead of fighting against... I accept.
Instead of hate.. I have respect.

A MAN.

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YES! There is no better feeling in the world, then the feeling of being a man. To me, it's a flexible feeling of focus, determination, and calm. Like when you see a lion moving slowly towards its prey. It is the feeling of complete and utter masculine energy!

The thing that did it for me is simply letting go of control. Letting go of trying to control a woman, a relationship, a conversation, etc. Just letting go and accepting things as they are. Being in the moment and just riding the wave.

thanks for the comment. I appreciate it.

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in UNDER an hour (2022 updated)

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