Body Language the key to Natural Game



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PostPosted: Tue Dec 07, 2010 9:00 am 
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That was however why I wrote that a mentally sexually healthy women loves sex more then men.
No need to tell that. I was also talking about mentally and sexually healthy women only when making my statement
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Again I say women love sex more then men(when sexually healthy). This is a statement I have never had a women deny. Not once has a women told me they think they enjoy sex less then men.
But most men would probably say the same - they don't think they enjoy sex less than a woman. Plus how can you measure how much you like something and compare with other persons liking "level"? Most people love sex and its difficult for them to even imagine someone loving it even more :D
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I think that you should change your mindset on this it is the reality of the world we are moving into. Women love sex, and they love it more then men. I suggest you realize this.
I don't need to realize that, I know that average woman enjoys sex more than average man.
What I dissagre is that ANY (yes yes speaking only about sexually and mentally healthy) woman love sex more than all men. Like make top 1000 women and top 1000 men and the very last woman of that top1000 list enjoys it more than ANY men of mens top1000. I disagree with that. Its overstatement.
Why I disagree? Most woman I had sex with enjoyed more than me, but there were few that enjoyed it on the same level as me. And taking me as an average man we can give it that there are many men who enjoy sex more than me. So all those men enjoy sex more than those few women I am talking about as well.


Bottom line I agree that most of them enjoy it more but I don't agree with you saying that ANY (yes yes again sexually healthy and all) woman enjoys it more than all men.

Hope you understand my position.
Cheers

PS: This stuff that you always tell about women loving sex more than men is great, because it boost confidence of any man reading this thread. One of the key points of the thread and even of the whole picking up game. I am sure there already have been situations like for instance a dude being in a romantic moment with a girl and thinking "what if she won't like the idea of having sex now" and then suddenly - but I read in the thread of poeticlyskuac that they love sex, I should go for it. I am sure there were results already based on this single thing you say all the time. So its great.

I understand what your saying, when I say they enjoy sex more I mean it scientifically. There brains are wired to experience things differently. With a girl she has more of an experience, it isn't just relieving for her. I am by no means saying sex isn't an experience for men, different though. A women's tiny little clit has twice as many nerve endings as mens penis, 8000 to 4000, and interacts with 15,000 additional nerve endings during intercourse(I just looked this up, I knew they had more sensitivity). A womens experience during sex(physically) along with the way her brain is wired makes it very difficult to enjoy sex on their level, in fact impossible with out your mind taking on a serious overhaul.

While we may "enjoy" having sex as much as anyone of us is capable of it is quite difficult to say which sex "enjoys" it more, women just have some advantages. We get different things out of it. I envy the experience they get out of it, their experience is most of the time better, we are physically and mentally handicapped in comparison to them. This is why rape is so much more vividly traumatizing for a women then a man(not talking about the mental effects).

I suppose you are correct that there is likely more than a women or 2 that doesn't enjoy sex more than men, but perhaps they didn't have a positive enough experience with sex. I knew a women who complained the size of her ex-husband was too big and sex was unenjoyable because it hurt, she was numb to sex being good. She didn't hate it by any means, but she didn't get out of sex what she could have.

I am just going to consider that such a small possibility that I am going to continue on with my philosophy. I suppose one women will prove me wrong, as I have been so many times but I feel that it is true until proven otherwise. :) I see your point agree you are likely correct, it is highly unlikely in most cases.

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PostPosted: Wed Dec 08, 2010 5:10 am 
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Okay so I've been dying to ask you this all day and I've finally had a chance to sit down and log on.

Broadly speaking I'm a much cleaner cut person than I was before, which has not only raised my game with women, but in the work environment too. Teachers, professors and classmates all see a positive change in my behavior. Kudos to you once again good sir.

This is terrific for first impressions, because it creates conditions for inner game to set in, however, how far along the process am I? I'm better than I was before at approaching and introducing myself at parties (not perfect when it comes to public places like malls, bars, restaurants, etc) , and have found that if I accomplish something, get enough sleep, exercise and eat well I'M EVEN BETTER AT THIS STUFF. How much does a healthy lifestyle play into your game? Do you find it challenging to exercise regularly, eat healthy and get enough sleep? I've found that it's actually quite difficult to be on top of this, BUT if you do it, it's actually AMAZING TO YOUR GAME.

Okay so onto my problem....

Ever since reading your thread I certainly get more looks from women, because of the confident posture, not looking down, smiling and keeping in mind a sense of fashion that fits me.

With all this great discovery in learning more about body language and seeing the effects of treating myself better, I've noticed that I'm still not where I'm at with where I want this training to take me. Although I'm better than before, I'm still intimidated by women I'm attracted to. Ironically, friends, family, colleagues, and women I'm NOT attracted are easier to talk to, which is so backwards in logic to me. Why are guys intimidated by women they see as SUPER ATTRACTIVE?

For me, it's less of me being comfortable with women as much as it is me being NATURAL with women. This is the key to my problem, but I'm still not sure how it all fits. Is it because I see them as "Potential Mates"? If so, how do you kill this nervousness that takes over? My stomach ALWAYS cringes a little and I can feel my inner psychology twirling before ANY SORT OF INTERACTION WITH THEM. This includes texting, facebook chat, IM chat, emails, phone conversation, BUT ESPECIALLY person to person conversation. Did this ever happen to you too? Have you ever had anxiety before approaching an attractive woman? If so, can you walk us through your method and how it evolved over time?

I've read responses on this thread saying that women want sex (as do men), so should I think of this in order to remain "Natural"? I've also read your advice on breathing and just simply listening to yourself breathe if you get anxious. What's the best advice you've heard on remaining composed and cool when you are in mid game? I think everything that follows after I make the approach is something I can definitely improve on. What part of the game do you find easier to flow with?

I've been returning and referencing your thread for advice for more than a month and a half now ("What did Poetic's thread say again?" I ask this one a lot in tough spots) , but I still have not landed a kiss close or F-close on my excursions to parties (I don't frequent the clubs too often and when I go to bars it's MAYBE once a month). I'm beginning to think if it's my inner game, but having the ability to TOTALLY NOT BE INTIMIDATED BY A HB is a mindset that I'm nowhere near yet. Are you at this point? If so, how long did it take for you to achieve this? Months, Weeks, Years? As a NATURAL is the objective to have sex with ANY GIRL? Or to have sex with an ATTRACTIVE girl that you WANT to have sex with?

Thank you once again for all your advice. This is the most comfortable I've ever been in my entire life when it comes to playing the game, mainly because the Natural approach fits me better.

-John

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PostPosted: Thu Dec 09, 2010 8:54 am 
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Ok sorry, meant to answer last night.

Thanks for all the love, I am glad so many people are getting something out of this stuff.

When it comes to your health obviously it is a good thing to keep up on it. I am not the healthiest guy. I don't work out that much(as often as I should), I am a big fan of how I feel after working out. When you work out, eat right, and sleep right you will have a stronger libido. Obviously it is easier to go talk to a girl when you feel confident and have a strong libido. I am most definitely not one of the health nuts, but I believe in and agree with being healthy.

There are a lot of guys that feel they have to get somewhere and look like something to feel comfortable with who they are, for a long time I felt I needed to lose weight. My driving concept to working out was to be better looking, just like so many others. The problem with feeling you need to be something better is that you need to feel good about your self RIGHT NOW! If you become comfortable with how you look now and then improve upon that then your confidence will be soaring. It is good to work out and you should want to get somewhere but you should also be comfortable with who you are now.

If I don't get enough sleep I just don't want to have sex(weakens my libido), I just want to sleep. When you are to tired to go have sex then you have no reason to talk to a girl. I am better with girls when I am tired because I don't care in some cases. They kind of seem to try to get my attention. I'd prefer to want to talk to a girl rather than feel as if she is bothering me.

I have a couple of statements I make regarding my lifestyle. My mental health is a bigger part of my life style then physical health(obviously by the amount of info here).

Some of my beliefs and Philosophies on Life Style:

I laugh each and every day away. If you ain't happy you're likely crappy. Laughter and the mind can always heal you, emotionally or physically. Enjoy life as they say: Don't take life to seriously you'll never get out of it alive.

If I am doing good today it is because I choose to be doing good today, I have a choice in whether I have a good day or not. Bad events happen, it is your choice to react to them in the manner you do. People don't like to be around people who are miserable, they tend to influence our mood.

Your mind is your largest limit, always let your limit expand. I am always in the middle of reading a few different books to exercise, strengthen my mind, and learn.

I have chosen to live a life that does not cause me guilt. I have chosen to feel that I deserve to have what I have and be what I am. This was one of the harder decisions and changes I made. Sometimes we end any chances we have because of the fact that we don't feel/think we deserve things. It is a large lesson to learn to not feel guilty or undeserving when you were raised differently.

Honesty is always the best policy but diplomacy should always accompany honesty. Always butter up the horrible truth. Lies often times cause larger problems even if the short term is nice, in some cases the horrible truth can strengthen a friendship.

If you ain't doing what you want to be doing, then you best get doing. We all have PLANS, what is the point in a plan? To prepare for something? Well preparation is key but act on that preparation, planning isn't doing. Planning to chat with a girl is not chatting with the girl, planning to go work out isn't working out.

Life is about building relationships, if you are not building bridges you are burning them. A good mental state is to always be good to people and they will often times return the favor. If you want to be someone and know everyone, you best be building relationships, with the door man, dj, promoter, bar tender, owner(bar or house), etc. A good mental perspective is to take on the idea helping other people it will all come back. It does wonders for your lifestyle if you get introduced glowingly to everyone.

I am far more for your mental strength, freedom, and health then for your physical health. They do play off each other but I will say far more health problems are caused from mental stress(something like 90% of cancer is considered self induced) then by not eating right. I know people that eat perfect and are in great shape, good looking people, etc., even crazier some of these very people die young due to a stressful life. To me that is crazy especially since working out makes you feel so much better. I'd much rather be me fat and smart then uptight and good looking(not that I am bad looking :D). Keep working out man, it will give you plenty of confidence, it did for me/ does for me(when I do it). I suppose I have made the mental excuse dancing(skanking to ska is harder then running IMO) and sex(good abdomen and lower body work out :D) are workouts and that is how I do it.

We all get intimidated by girls we are attracted to here and there, it isn't something you grow out of for a while(at least I am not completely free of it). I still have it happen when I crush on a girl here and there, normally this girl meets some serious standards. There are a lot of pretty girls but a pretty dope girl for me is rare. A girl that likes the same music, movies, etc., and is intriguing as well as attractive is rare for me. Normally they end up boring me, or being crazy and I am over it. Girls that are hot are all over the place, physical standards are there, but personality standards are so much more. With those particular girls I tend to get nervous.

When you talk to these women it is as if you are worried you will screw it up(at least that is how I thought), scrutinizing even the smallest of sentences let alone ask. I figure if I remember it she does, this is not the case if a women likes you those small stupid things aren't as big a deal. Don't scrutinize every action, it does you know good.

In the movie 100 Girls there is something he says about the ultra-hot girl of the dorms(Jaime Presley), "she is like the superbowl of girls, you don't know when you'll get another shot or if you do." This to me is a very true story for a lot of us. We put this girl up on a pedestal, as if she is better then other people. That is not the truth, she is the same as any other person with some solid AESTHETICS. For us guys this is huge, but we need to realize that it is only looks and there are literally 100s of millions of other attractive women. She is just a person.

When you talk to these people you aren't attracted to you have nothing to fear, nothing to lose. You can be yourself humorous, serious, or whatever. No need to screen yourself to appear as a good mate. When you talk to an attractive girl though you want to appear as a good mate. So you clean up your act and try not to ruin things, ugh what a terrible perspective. I personally down play myself rigorously, they know from my body language I am secure.

The point to all this is you are human, just like I am human and you just have to work through the nervousness, you have to push yourself. You and I are two different people what motivates me may not motivate you. For some people it is the thought of a relationship, others wife, others not being a virgin, others just getting tons of whoopie, the point is I can't push you to do these things. You have to find out what you want and run towards it. In other cases you have to find out what you don't want and run away from it. Some of us are positively motivated (reward) and other negatively motivated (running scared).

If you get nervous and start thinking start walking over to her, don't just sit there and think. Walk over as you start thinking that may help. If inaction is making you nervous try action. That is the only thing I guess I can say.

I don't try and kiss close or f-close women the first night. I steer away from girls like this, if they give it up that easy who else did they give it up to. To me it isn't worth it, it isn't what I am looking for. I kiss close girls with frequency but not because I am looking for it, just sort of happens. Your environment should not relate to body language, just verbal language. I do agree with the moving a girl to elsewhere and isolating. You can create a moment easier when you guys have less distractions. If you want to kiss close a girl you need to find a way to create moment hard to have them with people around distracting.

As far as natural, I don't think anyone can have sex with any women. Yeah these pick up artists are amazing but there are more then a few girls that would not sleep with them. Once you get to be a powerful magnetic personality then you will have more opportunity(a large quantity of women like me) but not every single girl.

For me my particular goal isn't to have every attractive girl, not even every girl I find attractive, my goal is to go after the women most appealing to me. In these cases some times I fall short, it happens. I go after girls I have commonalities with and good aesthetics(sexy), having both a rarity where I am. Sanity seems to always elude me when they happen to have those two.

If you want to have sex with every single girl you find attractive put your work in, that is not what I am for. It is cool have girls that are friends too, worlds best wingmen. What you want to do is up to you. If you want one special one cool, if you want a buck fuddy that's cool too, if you want a one night that is solid as well, but what ever your after may not be on par with what I am after. I am not going to comment on which girls you should have sex with.

A natural for me is having the ability to read the body language, say what they know wants to be said, and moving at the level they are suppose too. An unscripted conversation, each person gets talked to as an individual(not routine). Having a large pool of women to choose from and being able to act on it. Most get dubbed the he get's more ass then a toilet see. This is natural to me.

What you choose to do with those abilities has nothing to do with the definition for me. If you want to have sex with every women go for it, what your looking for with the your tool (natural ability with women) have nothing to do with each other from my personal standpoint. Use and develop your own personal philosophy on which women you want to have sex with or how many or whatever.

This is super long sorry for any ramblings. I'll cut it up and edit it tomorrow. Just wanted to answer the questions. Super tired. Good night...

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PostPosted: Sun Dec 12, 2010 6:32 am 
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"She has to trust you won't judge her, I am very good at getting girls to trust me because I don't see having a strong sexuality as a bad thing. "

Poetic,

I agree that making sexual jokes and getting into sexual discussions with a woman can increase the sexual tension between you and her, but how do you find the confidence to do this with a girl you just met? Also, how do you escalate when it comes to building sexual tension. I remember the post you've written in this thread regarding kino escalation, so does this and sexual tension building ultimately lead you to the same goal?

"When women are comfortable with you and trust you enough they admit it without any shame, it is because people judge them over their driving primal sexual urges that make them hold back."

In your experience what's the relationship between getting a woman to be comfortable around you and her wanting to have sex with you? If you approach an attractive woman and begin conversing with her do you find she's more willing to play the game if she sees you as non-threatening? When I say this I mean if she knows you won't judge her.

What are the results to framing yourself as the non-threatening, non-judgmental guy? Sexually speaking are they more cooperative to your desires (given that she's an attractive woman with an appealing personality)? If so, could you shed some more light on your methods behind creating situations where one could graduate into sexual discussions + jokes with a woman who isn't comfortable discussing these topics.

Thank you very much for your insight.

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PostPosted: Sun Dec 12, 2010 11:15 pm 
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Situation - bus, she sits in front and a bit left from me (rows of 2 seats facing each other). I was not paying attention to her (was looking through the window + texting etc). She was preening a lot (fixing hairs and stuff all the time almost non stop) and fidgeting. She was sitting in my eye sight so maybe she was asking for attention?
Just made me think.


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PostPosted: Mon Dec 13, 2010 11:30 am 
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I don't find the confidence to mention sex with every girl. How I talk is person to person. Some people prefer you cuss, some prefer you stay courteous, each person needs to be classified so to speak. With men some prefer: sir, bro, boss, etc. Each person will react differently to different things. Environment also will change quite a bit what is acceptable and isn't acceptable. For obvious reasons different people will be in different environments as well as act different in certain environments.

So there is a filter, there is always a judgement on whether the person can handle it. As there should be for you. I have said some crazy things to girls, and I have got away with it. That said my character is crazy. Not many people get away with saying what I do. My laugh from what I have been told is infectious, I just laugh and they laugh because of my laugh.

Now on to the confidence to say it, I never let a "that's what she said" go. Sex is immediately brought up. I have a bit of wit with sexual jokes as well, I spot em and use em naturally. I have told girls at the bar they needed to spread their legs it wasn't meant to be said that way, but I was talking about her pool stance. It went sexual from there. I have told that story to mention sex.

Go side routes to mention sex. I happen to be very comfortable mentioning it, I guess I just go with the statement my boss coined: Sorry(innocent non-threatening body language smiling), my mind isn't always in the gutter but it's never above the curb.

When it comes to building sexual tension I was saying that it is a good idea to go to far then back off. Two forward and One back. You have to realize escalation is building sexual tension. With every step forward you are adding to that sexual tension. You aren't trying to convince her to have sex, you are building sexual tension to get to the ultimate goal, having sex. Make her want it more than you. A girl needs to realize you are a very desirable mate.

You already know she wants to have sex. You move on to her wanting to have sex with you. Then she is past wanting to have sex with you, she is on to needing to have sex with you. This is a formula I have worked out recently. With every escalation every move you are escalating and building tension. That is why you escalate to build sexual tension.

A women will never have sex with you if she isn't comfortable with you. It isn't consensual and considered rape. If you are considered harmless than yes she will be far more willing to talk to you. If she feels threatened she will look to leave. Just like any of us. If you are around someone who seems threatening you tend to leave. It is part of our natural behavior, basic fight or flight.

Judgement is true, she needs to know that you are neutral with any statement. If you are sitting there judging her yeah she will feel uncomfortable. If she is comfortable admitting things because your lack of judgment and your listening ear. Think about how easy it is to admit these things to someone who doesn't judge. It is easy to talk because you are willing to listen and stay neutral.

Well I have a lot of positive features that girls flock to. I use positivity to attract mates. Girls don't try and validate themselves because of a fake persona. I don't judge them for anything, they know they can be comfortable and trust me. This whole time you are also building sexual tension through words and actions. It is easier to get past a girls "bitch shield" or defensive behavior if she trusts you for obvious reasons.

Non-threatening body language shows them you are harmless and should you hook them in the conversation with something intriguing make it worth continuing a long conversation. If you are up in her face, she feels backed up, what will she do? Look to leave(flight) or get defensive(fight). So you need to be a guy that is non-threatening.

I don't really know what to tell you regarding humor and sex. Just listen to every statement from a sexual stand point and point it out to people laughing. "She never said that" against a "that's what she said" is a solid rebuttal. That is all I do is I see all the sexual jokes in life, it is funny to me I point that out to others.

Comfort is something you can only get through if you are not worried. If you are uncomfortable doing such find a way to get relaxed. When you are relaxed and having fun you won't be nervous about what you say or said. Find a way to make yourself comfortable before prowling. Don't sit and focus on it letting it become some huge ordeal. If you keep thinking about it then you will likely see every negative possibility while ignoring all the positive results. Just handle your business and stop thinking. This is the problem when you sit there and analyze a situation you look for all the possible out comes, if you are like most people the out comes that come to mind most often are negative. Screw analysis, just walk up say "how's it goin'?", don't think just act.

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PostPosted: Mon Dec 13, 2010 8:42 pm 
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poeticlyskuac great material you have written here man, thanks.

btw can you recommend me some good books on body language(general body language)


thank you very much

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PostPosted: Tue Dec 14, 2010 3:05 am 
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Situation - bus, she sits in front and a bit left from me (rows of 2 seats facing each other). I was not paying attention to her (was looking through the window + texting etc). She was preening a lot (fixing hairs and stuff all the time almost non stop) and fidgeting. She was sitting in my eye sight so maybe she was asking for attention?
Just made me think.

That is definitely a sign she was nervous(fidgety), preening for ya. I'd say she was asking for you to recognize it and pay attention there. Nice spot! If there was a bunch of eye contact you were given the green light, if she looked interesting you should have followed up.

Side Note: Sometimes however a girl is talking on the phone(I know this wasn't the case) or she is thinking about another guy(not making eye contact with you). I have seen a lot of girls talk about a guy, think about a guy, texting a guy, or talking to him(phone) and she was directing her body language to him even with him out of sight. Obviously eye contact is rough when they aren't around but they do the same things as if the guy was there.

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PostPosted: Tue Dec 14, 2010 6:16 am 
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poeticlyskuac great material you have written here man, thanks.

btw can you recommend me some good books on body language(general body language)


thank you very much

Thanks for the love!

There are 4 books mentioned in the first post on the thread.

What Every Body is Saying
-Joe Navarro

The Encyclopedia of Body Language
-Allan and Barbara Pease

Love Signals
-David Givens

Undercover Sex Signals
-Leil Lowndes

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PostPosted: Wed Dec 29, 2010 7:59 pm 
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There are a few nice videos on here guys check this page out.

http://freelanguage.org/learn-body-lang ... ideos-book

http://www.ehow.com/video_4438796_flirt ... guage.html

Fantastic

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PostPosted: Fri Dec 31, 2010 5:40 pm 
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personally, I dont think body language is ever an issue for anyone, unless the body language is blatantly bad.

to try and change your "natural" body language is "unnatural". everybody walks a different way, holds themselves differently etc

just do whats natural for you - but make sure it isn't stupid or bad BL.


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PostPosted: Fri Dec 31, 2010 7:08 pm 
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personally, I dont think body language is ever an issue for anyone, unless the body language is blatantly bad.

to try and change your "natural" body language is "unnatural". everybody walks a different way, holds themselves differently etc

just do whats natural for you - but make sure it isn't stupid or bad BL.

This isn't just about holding your own body language which is a bigger deal then you realize. You can derive confidence from just how you stand. This is why you can always tell when someone is insecure just by how they are standing.

This is also about reading their body language, how to know they are comfortable or uncomfortable. Whether they like or they don't. It goes over a lot of info for you to be here making one statement regarding a 11 plus page thread.

Read the thread first, then tell me the information is useless. Second person to write something in disagreement on the thread, there has been 14000 views, just saying look at the information before holding judgment. Makes you look pretty bad when you aren't even willing to read the thread.

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PostPosted: Sun Jan 02, 2011 5:00 pm 
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personally, I dont think body language is ever an issue for anyone, unless the body language is blatantly bad.

to try and change your "natural" body language is "unnatural". everybody walks a different way, holds themselves differently etc

just do whats natural for you - but make sure it isn't stupid or bad BL.

This isn't just about holding your own body language which is a bigger deal then you realize. You can derive confidence from just how you stand. This is why you can always tell when someone is insecure just by how they are standing.

This is also about reading their body language, how to know they are comfortable or uncomfortable. Whether they like or they don't. It goes over a lot of info for you to be here making one statement regarding a 11 plus page thread.

Read the thread first, then tell me the information is useless. Second person to write something in disagreement on the thread, there has been 14000 views, just saying look at the information before holding judgment. Makes you look pretty bad when you aren't even willing to read the thread.
just adding my comments mate - and no where did I say its useless

body language isnt a big deal if your body language is ALREADY ok. read what I wrote again. If your body language is blatantly bad, then YES, this thread is more useful.

also, manually deriving confidence from how you stand is AFC and try hard. you should stand and do things in your most natural position - everyone has a different way of standing, walking, talking

trying to copy someone elses way of doing things is lying to yourself, taking you out of the moment, making you conscious and will lower your energy


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 02, 2011 8:25 pm 
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just adding my comments mate - and no where did I say its useless

body language isnt a big deal if your body language is ALREADY ok. read what I wrote again. If your body language is blatantly bad, then YES, this thread is more useful.

also, manually deriving confidence from how you stand is AFC and try hard. you should stand and do things in your most natural position - everyone has a different way of standing, walking, talking

trying to copy someone elses way of doing things is lying to yourself, taking you out of the moment, making you conscious and will lower your energy

I understand your assessment but your comment falls so short of where the thread actually goes that it is just disappointing that you feel you have the right to make a comment. Again if you understood the concepts of body language then you would know that how you stand is how you feel. If you stand insecure you are insecure. Changing your body language changes how you feel and your emotions.

Standing like someone else? You do realize that outside of a few cultural gestures body language is universal. If you look confident in one country you look confident in almost any. So yes you would be standing like someone else but you already are so you might as well stand like someone who has confidence.

I understand that everyone has a different way(signature) of standing, walking, and talking. However everyone confident has a different way of standing, walking, and talking, if you ain't standing similar to that way already you best change it up. Most people that are here have to do that, most people lack confidence with women hence them being on the site. So what do most people have? Bad body language, if not women would already be hittin' them up.

Have you ever heard the phrase "fake it until you make it"? That is the same thing that you have to do in pick up anyways. Isn't it?

You do realize that there are at most 5 whole posts on how you hold yourself vs. like another at least 80 on other things right? Reading body language was the reason the start of the thread started. Read the damn thread!

This is rude, but so is your opinion. You don't understand body language and therefore lack a valued opinion. I'd appreciate it if you stayed off the thread until you read the whole thread. You will give others bad ideas with your ignorance.

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PostPosted: Sat Jan 22, 2011 1:04 am 
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Just Read a New Book

Winning Body Language by Mark Bowden this is about your own body language not reading it.

A lot of different information...

He has a bunch of new statements that are very original to him. He has a unique back ground involving acting so he gives you a unique outlook. He specializes in giving presentations, debates, etc. His outward message is his specialty basically. As I read the book I realized that a lot of what he was saying is absolutely true, so I'd like to share/summarize as best I can.

He being an actor has learned to present in such away that he can bring emotion out. So what he does is uses the fact that your energy copies his to his advantage. Moving his hands up and down his body he will bring you up and down and create a much better more rhythmic "emotional roller coaster". So he captures the crowd, gets them in sync, then moves their emotions up in down so he can control and get the desired result.

The Planes

He talks a lot about something called Planes: Grotesque Plane(thighs, pocket area), Truth Plane(navel area, waste), Passion Plane(chest chin), Disclosure Plane(mouth), Thought Plane(above mouth on head), Ecstasy Plane(above your head).

Each region of your body controls an emotion and where you hold your hands.

When you hold your hands around your thighs(Grotesque Plane) it is low energy, bland. People who hold their hands in this area seem untrustworthy, awkward, "off", it isn't attractive when someone does this with their body language.

When you hold your hands around your abdomen/navel area(Truth Plane) you seem honest. Go over any pictures of Jesus, Buddha, Gandhi, you will notice they hold their hands around their. They subconsciously do this. It makes you trust them. When you are talking with someone it is a good idea to hold your hands around this area.

Now you hold your hands around chest/shoulders. Refers to this as the Passion Plane. When you do these you evoke passion. So if you are talking about something you love you hold your hands around here and it will bring out a lot of passion. If you are to close to someone you can seem threatening and evoke a negative passion. So be careful when you put your hands up to your chest.

Hold your hands around your mouth, the Disclosure Plane. If you want to get your point across as you talking put your hands around here. You will appear to be annunciating. You will get them to listen.

Hold your hands around your head(Thought Plane) and you get them to access thought. They will follow you in their mind. So they will access thoughts for you. If you want someone to think about something you raise your hands up to around your head while you are talking.

Hold your hands above your head, Ecstasy Plane. We all know what happens when we hold our hands above our head. We feel good, hence Ecstasy Plane. This raises the energy. Makes you feel ecstatic. We do this at concerts and kids do this all the time.

Obama

Obama used all of these tremendously. When he would start a speech during elections he would hold his hands around his navel/abdomen area saying trust me, I am telling you the truth. He talked about things, then he would drop his hands to his side talking about the bad, get a grotesque feeling about an issue.

Obama moves you to passion when he raises his hands, "We need change" a pumped fist. Then he drops you back down to the truth plane to discuss the issue some more. Then he tells you the solution he makes you passionate "We need change". Repeats it while disclosing to the crowd moving his hands to his mouth after a passionate spill.

He gets you to think about the problem, raises he hand to his head. Then drops down his hands to tell you the truth with his hands around his navel. Slowly moving you up and down putting you in the ecstatic mood here and there as he gets you to raise your hand and pump your fist.

During his speech he will move you up and down he does all of this with where her hands are. Almost playing us like a symphony.

Tell the Story

You guys can use this to your advantage when you tell a story. I'd recommend trying out using this. Works surprising well. I will say sometimes you should start copying there body language to fall into sync with them. After you are in sync you can move their emotions up and down relatively easily.

Start adding facial expressions to help make people happier or sadder etc. Expanding on their emotion. You can make them feel the story and how you felt.

You can use your hands to act out what happened and it will help detail the story and make it far more entertaining. How attractive do you think you become when they associate you with a wide range of emotions? Especially including passion, truth, and ecstasy.

Keep your hands away from your thighs, it's bland and boring and I didn't need this book to teach me that. Unless that is what you want to evoke. Which is fine, sometimes you want to make the audience disgusted with something in the story.

Isopraxism

His system works off the fact that people absorb the energy of those around them. They absorb your fun. So if you are passionate they become passionate. If you "feel" honest they feel you are honest. If you are looking at them with your hands around your head they feel you are thoughtful, they feel thoughtful. When you raise your hands you raise their level. Ecstasy, fans do this at football games when their team captain raises his hand.

So keep in mind you are using your body language to control your audience whether that be a friend, interview, girl, presentation, speech, whatever, this happens regardless. Why not know how to use what you have been properly?

Just some new info I liked and thought I'd share.

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Blogging again living life: http://www.Scienceofnaturalgame.com


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