Quote:
Hey guys, gonna keep this real short
I have been togheter with my girlfriend for 7 months now, and during that time she has had a guy friend. I have been certain he was in love with my girl all the time, but she said he wasnt.
Yesterday my girl told me that this guy confessed his love for her...and this was about 2-3 months ago. So she lies/hided this from me and im really upset about that. She said The reason was that she did not know how to handle it and was afraid to lose hem as a friend.
Im glad she came to me and told me about it, but im angry that she lied about it for a while (and hanging out with him during that time)
Now she is upset cause she knows that their friendship has to end
How should i handle this?
Should i support and comfort my girl or be upset with her?
Thanks
Hmm....Thought about this one for a while...my 2 cents:
Just be honest, ie she lied and hid something and you're upset about that. Personally, if it were me, I wont be upset if it happened like this: he told her 3 months ago, she dealt with it on her own for 3 months and didnt tell me. To me, I dont need to know what some guy tells my gf, my concern is how she handles it. If she handled it properly and didnt tell me, it never came up in conversation and she didnt lie or hide it if asked. Cool. Its like, I dont need to know if my gf realized she put on 5 pounds. If however, your gf handled it poorly, ie, acted like nothing was wrong, still hung out with the guy AFTER he confessed, when it came up in conversation with me she lied about it then, to me its a red flag that she handles situations like that. I wont be upset some guy told her he loved her 2-3 months ago, I'd be upset for 2-3 months she lied about it (if she did). That would weaken the trust I have for her if she has shown she lies like that. Now I dont know your situation, maybe your gf just didnt tell you what some guy told her and she didnt lie..she just handled it on her own, or maybe she lied to you for 2-3 months as the topic kept coming up.
If you're upset, act upset. If you're not then dont. 7 months in and you're not confident in yourself enough to act the way you feel. I'm not saying to start conflict, just that if she ACTUALLY broke your trust, dont be afraid to address it.