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n2thevoid
PostPosted: Thu Jun 19, 2014 7:30 am 
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Well she already did end it first so I don't think I have a choice in the matter anyway.
What you're doing is relinquishing power, letting it be her decision and chances are it always was this way during the rel.
Can you elaborate on this? I was always leading the relationship and when she said she wanted to break up I simply said ok it's over.
Your refusing to let go is every indication you're still attached. Your wanting to hold onto something that's not even aligned with your values. Let her go, if in fact she's personality disordered she's def not good for you to be around. This is about saving yourself, which means not being her or having ANY contact with her whatsoever. Until you're on the other side of the attachment you won't be stable.
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Muldoon
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2014 2:51 am 
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You're absolutely right, I just have to ride out the pain.
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n2thevoid
PostPosted: Fri Jun 20, 2014 3:34 am 
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You're absolutely right, I just have to ride out the pain.
Yup.

Your options are as follows:
-swallow your medicine now, go through the pain and out on the other wise of the attachment free of the curse
Or...
-cling onto toxicity, get further entrenched emotionally (attachment wise) only to temporarily alleviate the pain somewhat only to go through far more pain than you can imagine at a later date.
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Muldoon
PostPosted: Sat Jun 21, 2014 9:21 am 
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Honestly what's really bugging me is that I feel like I have no control. I feel like I don't even have the choice between the two options you mentioned because she broke up with me and is not contacting me at all within the last two weeks. That's what's driving me crazy me not being able to decide which option. Although obviously I need to not call her it just feels almost impossible to resist at times.
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n2thevoid
PostPosted: Sat Jun 21, 2014 10:09 am 
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Honestly what's really bugging me is that I feel like I have no control. I feel like I don't even have the choice between the two options you mentioned because she broke up with me and is not contacting me at all within the last two weeks. That's what's driving me crazy me not being able to decide which option. Although obviously I need to not call her it just feels almost impossible to resist at times.
Can still take some control back. How? By not giving into the temptation and contacting her.

Your attachment is trying to pull you back in. You can take control now by blocking her number, email etc and moving on in spite of what she may or may not be doing. What u r doing is taking control of your life again, for YOU. Whenever you shift your focus to her, that's when your ego convinces you you've 'lost'. Not having her in your life is a gain, that's the reality.

You'll see this more clearly once the attachment is broken.
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Muldoon
PostPosted: Sat Jun 21, 2014 7:12 pm 
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I know, it's just hard because she's on my mind 24/7. Thank you.
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